Bigfoot is a Fake!

[rogue master]

Bigfoot is a Fake!

Here is the text of the article:

Sasquatch Speaks: The Truth Is Out There

Now it can be told: Bigfoot isn't real!

So says Bob Heironimus, a retired Pepsi bottler from Yakima, Wash., who reveals to the Reliable Source that he donned a gorilla costume and appeared in the famous grainy film clip that helped fuel the Bigfoot craze in 1967 and is studied by Bigfoot, Sasquatch and Yeti investigators to this day.

"It's time people knew it was a hoax," Heironimus told us. "It's time to let this thing go. I've been burdened with this for 36 years, seeing the film clip on TV numerous times. Somebody's making lots of money off this, except for me. But that's not the issue -- the issue is that it's time to finally let people know the truth."

Heironimus, 63, makes his full "confession," as he calls it, in a just-published book by paranormal investigator Greg Long, "The Making of Bigfoot." Long spent four years investigating the 60-second film clip and the people behind it. He traces the shaggy Bigfoot costume to a North Carolina gorilla suit specialist, Philip Morris, who says he sold it for $435 to an amateur documentary maker named Roger Patterson (who died in 1972). The hoax was staged near Bluff Creek in Northern California, according to Heironimus.

"Patterson was the cameraman," Long tells us. "They made a gentleman's agreement that Bob would get in the suit and walk in front of the camera for $1,000."

But, Heironimus says, "I was never paid a dime for that, no sir," and adds, "Sure I want to make some money. I feel that after 36 years I should get some of it."

Backers of the Bigfoot legend include primatologist Jane Goodall, who was in Silver Spring last week to tout a new chimpanzee documentary that premieres tomorrow on Discovery Communications' Animal Planet network. Too busy to comment herself, Goodall authorized an aide, Nona Gandelman, to tell us she has read "countless books" about Bigfoot, Sasquatch, Yeti, Chinese wild men and other creatures. "She's spoken to people whom she respects who say they have seen one of these hominids," said Gandelman, "and to many other people she respects who have heard strange calls they thought were made by Bigfoot. As a scientist, she has a very open mind about this and has yet to close the door on the possibility."

Bigfoot researcher John Green, a retired Canadian journalist, says the book doesn't disprove the existence of the mysterious beast. "It's all [expletive]," he told us. "There are going to be libel actions flying."

Tom Malone, a lawyer in Minneapolis, called us Friday on behalf of Bob Gimlin, associate of the now-dead Bigfoot filmmaker. "I'm authorized to tell you that nobody wore a gorilla suit or monkey suit and that Mr. Gimlin's position is that it's absolutely false and untrue."

And the mystery lives on . . .

I thought someone else (who is now dead) had claimed in the early 90's that he posed as bigfoot for the Patterson film. The main thing that makes his story not credible is that since he wasn't paid and didn't have a contract that he would have come out a long time ago. The debate continues...

[Moogs]

Actually, I believe that film has been known as a "fake" for some years now. Someone got wise and studied the gait of the "ape" and other factors that could be discerned from the film (in tandem with computer modeling and some knowledge of the physics behind ape anatomy) and concluded that it could not possibly have been real.

My take: for this guy, it really *is* about the money.


Even so, there have been sightings all over Washington and Oregon supposedly. Although I often wonder why there are none in southwestern British Columbia since the climate and terrain is virtually the same in many spots...

...could it be Canadians have a better sense of humor and "don't find the shit funny"?

[Giaguara]

no. really? what next? some old redneck confesses he dressed up as santa claus and another redneck dressing as ronald mcdonald?

[Powerdoc]

The key word is money. People who have done this fake will never admit it. They are simple scrooges.

[Kickaha]

I still hold out hope.

I've been hiking high into the backcountry in the North Cascades, and haven't seen anything... but have heard some night cries that were utterly unlike any animal I know to be resident up there.

A gibbon is probably the closest thing I've heard to it.

When you hear two of them calling to each other across a valley, it can be a little unnerving. Especially when you're *IN* the valley.

[Ganondorf]

Old news.

[Argento]

Well when Murbot is finally willing to admit it was him it'll be over.

[Stoo]

When you hear two of them calling to each other across a valley, it can be a little unnerving. Especially when you're *IN* the valley.

/me is glad the largest predator here is a fox. Or maybe a badger.

[Jubelum]

Great. Earlier today I heard that my beloved Mac is not a religion, now Bigfoot is a fraud. I'm going to go read some Poe and Hemingway and contemplate what is left of my reasons for living.

I love this board. 8)

[Kickaha]

Poe was a heroin addict, and Hemingway was an alcoholic.

Next?

[Giaguara]

no wait .. we've knewn bigfoot is fake since the first episodes of simpsons. everybody knows that the guy who dressed like bigfoot was homer simpson.