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stupidest commercials ever

post #1 of 50
Thread Starter 
ok, just saw one of the most terrible and idiotic commercials i have ever seen. its for a dodge durango, and shows a durango passing a porsche 911 while pulling a trailor, and ends w/ the wife saying, "oh great, stuck behind another one of these" as they come across another 911...

seriously--what kind of morons write this shit??????????
what a load of crap
give me a break...
im sry, but this is so bad i dont even know what to say...

share any other pointless and idiotic commercials uv seen--i know ther are plenty, but cant remember right now...
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
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"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
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post #2 of 50
big SUV driving through deserted wilderlands then a lovely nature scene and it zooms out to show a little girl and her father.
Girl: "Why doesnt everybody come to see this?"
Father: "Because not everyone can get here"

Why do I think that the real reason is because places like that dont exist due to these damn SUVs...
Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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post #3 of 50
The dumbest damned tagline I've ever heard has got to be from that SUV commercial with Tiger Woods: "It's all good."

Is this the best they can do?
I'm not going anywhere.
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I'm not going anywhere.
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post #4 of 50
Dell!! Especially their Christmas one, where "Steve" is an elf telling santa how every kid is asking for some toy and how someone should tell them about dell. All their commercials are pathetic, but that one is above and beyond.
post #5 of 50
Anything with Jeff Goldblum or Steve Ballmer.
*Registered March 1, 1999*
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*Registered March 1, 1999*
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post #6 of 50
Can't really name a specific offender right now (names escape me), but what I hate most are those commercials, usually by big investment or financial firms, or even tech companies, that take the ultra touchy-feely approach.

The tinkling piano or stirring strings, obligatory slo-mo footage of families or individuals of every (and I mean EVERY) race/gender/appearance, all pulled together with an all-too-solemn voice over talking about "trust" or "moving forward" or whatever.

You know the type: these heavy-handed, self-important commercials that are oh so SERIOUS and so forth.

SNL did a great parody on those a year or so back with this fake commercial of all these business and technology cliches, none of them really going together or making much sense. Then at the end, was the logo and tagline, which was "Even we don't know what we do".



I just hate overblown, touchy-feely stuff by companies obviously bandwagon-jumping or blatantly trying to tug at heartstrings or invoke a lump in the throat.

I don't buy into that horseshit and it insults my intelligence, as it should everyone else's.

post #7 of 50
Either those stupid Dell commercials with Steven or the iPod commerical.
post #8 of 50
I hate those new Pentium 4 ads with the aliens. I miss the Blue Man Group Ads. They were cool, even though I don't like Pentiums.
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post #9 of 50
Ahh yes, those stupid Pentium 4 ads with the aliens! I'd always wanted to know what would happen if I plugged a P4 into my flying saucer. <img src="graemlins/bugeye.gif" border="0" alt="[Skeptical]" />

A particularly annoying series of ads here in Canada are put out by the Buck-a-Day company. They sell "genuine IBM computers" to the tune of some excruciatingly awful music.
I'm not going anywhere.
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I'm not going anywhere.
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post #10 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by tuxbook731:
<strong>I hate those new Pentium 4 ads with the aliens. I miss the Blue Man Group Ads. They were cool, even though I don't like Pentiums.</strong><hr></blockquote>

Yeah, those are pretty stupid too.
post #11 of 50
I hate the new Windows XP commercials.

Yeah, the Blue Men were pretty cool.
post #12 of 50
Every single AFLAC commercial ever made...
post #13 of 50
Fscking Geico / AFLAC / Progressive Auto Insurance ads

Steven the Dell Whore

iPod ads

Jeff Goldblum ads

Any ad for a business that tries to milk the events of Septemer 11th. "Keep America Rolling".

Any ad with a politican. Especially George W Bush. Politics aside, anything he says sounds really idiotic, contrived and completely facile. Just a string of nationalistic cliches, most of the time that don't even jibe with his actions.
post #14 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by pscates:
<strong>
SNL did a great parody on those a year or so back with this fake commercial of all these business and technology cliches, none of them really going together or making much sense. Then at the end, was the logo and tagline, which was "Even we don't know what we do".
</strong><hr></blockquote>

Then there was one kinda like that for an investment firm: <a href="http://www.clownpenis.fart" target="_blank">www.clownpenis.fart</a>
I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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post #15 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by cdhostage:
<strong>I hate the new Windows XP commercials.

Yeah, the Blue Men were pretty cool.</strong><hr></blockquote>

At least windows XP HAS commercials. When was the last time I saw an OS X commercial, let me think, oh NEVER
I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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post #16 of 50
I find the Jeep tie-in with Band of Brothers pretty funny.
proud resident of a failed state
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proud resident of a failed state
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post #17 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by iDude:
<strong>Dell!! Especially their Christmas one, where "Steve" is an elf telling santa how every kid is asking for some toy and how someone should tell them about dell. All their commercials are pathetic, but that one is above and beyond.</strong><hr></blockquote>
AHhaha yeah I about fell off my chair when I saw that lameness. Dell should have just put Beavis and Butthead in their commercials instead. Sad part about it is.. this guy is you average Windows toted teenager you find out the net. So their marketing is actually dead on.
The crucial memorandum will be snared in the out-basket by
the paper clip of the overlying memo and go to file.
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The crucial memorandum will be snared in the out-basket by
the paper clip of the overlying memo and go to file.
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post #18 of 50
Oh my god, those stupid buck a day adds, Id forgotten about those... ARGH!

*to the tune of that shit techno "your better off alone" song*
"Do you think you reaaaaaalllly want a clone..."

FCUK I HATE THOSE!

Face it, most advertisers should be lined up against a wall and shot.
Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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post #19 of 50
I liked the Nissan ones that at the end did a one letter at a time, "GO FARTHER".

I always loved pausing this on a VCR with
"GO FART"....

i am monkey
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i am monkey
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post #20 of 50
The iPod ad
Because the people who are crazy enough to think thay can change the world, are the ones who do
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Because the people who are crazy enough to think thay can change the world, are the ones who do
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post #21 of 50
the ipod ad is retarded... we see an actual ipod for 2 seconds...

If someone can find that <a href="http://www.clownpenis.fart" target="_blank">www.clownpenis.fart</a> ad I'd like a download of it.

"The young people of America need be taught that the only pride they may properly hold is in the content of their character, and the achievements they make. There is no legitimate pride or moral...
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"The young people of America need be taught that the only pride they may properly hold is in the content of their character, and the achievements they make. There is no legitimate pride or moral...
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post #22 of 50
"Tune in to Good Morning America on Monday morning to see what "IT" is"....



[ 12-03-2001: Message edited by: Moogs ]</p>
Aldo is watching....
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Aldo is watching....
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post #23 of 50
Seems like them SUV commercials rank as the worst of all time...

There was a Jeep Liberty ad I saw last night...where it caressingly drives up the Statue of Liberty's skirt and all the way up to the top. There was a song with it but I forgot what it was...I was getting nauseous at he time.

Another thing...SUV's, much less any vehicle as far as I know...CANNOT DRIVE UP WALLS, STATUES OR THE SUN!
I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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post #24 of 50
The Dell ads with Steve, WIndows XP ads, new Pentium 4 ads.

What are you talking about the Tiger Woods Buick commercials are great!

"Looks like we're not in Kansas anymore"
"Are you Tiger Woods?"
"No"

"What? You were expecting Igor? Ahahahaha!..."

The best commercials are almost every golf commercial.

~Winner of the Official 2003 AppleInsider NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament Pool~
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~Winner of the Official 2003 AppleInsider NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament Pool~
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post #25 of 50
Best ads are beer ads
<a href="http://mmm.beer.com" target="_blank">mmmm... beer... .com</a>
Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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post #26 of 50
posted by groverat :

I find the Jeep tie-in with Band of Brothers pretty funny.
----------------
Ya, the funniest thing is that the commercial is about how Jeep helped the the Americans in WWII but now adays Jeep is owned by a German company
post #27 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by solo:
<strong>posted by groverat :

I find the Jeep tie-in with Band of Brothers pretty funny.
----------------
Ya, the funniest thing is that the commercial is about how Jeep helped the the Americans in WWII but now adays Jeep is owned by a German company </strong><hr></blockquote>

Don't get me started on that supposed "merger of equals." It was more like a hostile takeover. Just as Chrysler comes alive and makes good cars again, they go sell themselves.
I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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post #28 of 50
I'd say the worst ad ever is a tie among all those local car ads where the announcer is dressed in a funny outfit, screaming at the top of his lungs, or they make their car out to be this AMAZING thing when it's just a car.

Yeah, I really want to buy a car from someone who screams at me the whole time.

Runners up: Personal injury lawyer commercials ("If you've been injured, you're going to need a lawyer."), or debt consolidation companies ("You've been so irresponsible with money, you get to sell your soul to us now.")
Living life in glorious 4G HD (with a 2GB data cap).
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Living life in glorious 4G HD (with a 2GB data cap).
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post #29 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by CosmoNut:
<strong>Runners up: Personal injury lawyer commercials ("If you've been injured, you're going to need a lawyer."), or debt consolidation companies ("You've been so irresponsible with money, you get to sell your soul to us now.")</strong><hr></blockquote>

<a href="http://www.adcritic.com/content/fx-network-the-x-show-lawyer.html" target="_blank">http://www.adcritic.com/content/fx-network-the-x-show-lawyer.html</a>

post #30 of 50
Car ads are especially funny. Because they're all the same car.

You have all these ads for all these 'different' brands of car. They market them based on the music playing in the background. Techno. Jazz. Lame alternative. Rock. Classical.

Lifestyle is the only way these companies can differentiate their products, because they're all the same product.

<a href="http://www.adbusters.org/campaigns/first/toolbox/agitators/matthews.html" target="_blank">
</a>

[ 12-04-2001: Message edited by: stimuli ]</p>
No, the bazaar cannot satisfy users. Neither can the cathedral. Nothing can satisfy users, because software is written to enable rather than satisfy, and because most users are mewling malcontents...
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No, the bazaar cannot satisfy users. Neither can the cathedral. Nothing can satisfy users, because software is written to enable rather than satisfy, and because most users are mewling malcontents...
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post #31 of 50
Thread Starter 
[quote]Originally posted by stimuli:
<strong>Car ads are especially funny. Because they're all the same car.

You have all these ads for all these 'different' brands of car. They market them based on the music playing in the background. Techno. Jazz. Lame alternative. Rock. Classical.

Lifestyle is the only way these companies can differentiate their products, because they're all the same product.

<a href="http://www.adbusters.org/campaigns/first/toolbox/agitators/matthews.html" target="_blank">
</a>

[ 12-04-2001: Message edited by: stimuli ]</strong><hr></blockquote>

hardly
a car is NOT just another car...
japanese make very different cars than americans--japanese make smaller, more efficient cars w/ smaller engines and are more reliable. americans make bigger, noisier, much less efficient cars w/ huge engines that are more prone to break down. but theyre cheaper.
european cars are kind of the middle ground, and more expensive cause they are higher quality usually--moreso the german brands.

so please please never NEVER compare a freakin KIA (or hyundai) to a TOYOTA again--damn, those are probably the worst commercials...
it dont matter what the price is...yer still buying a freakin kia, for the love of God...

sry fer the rant, but please dont turn this into a car thread, cause not all cars are the same...
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
post #32 of 50
european cars are kind of the middle ground,
Dont remember where I heard it, but supposedly some European car company is designing a straight out desil car (no fuel cells or anything) that gets 1000 miles on a gallon of desil.
THAT is efficient.

Now if only we could get fuel cells in cars...
Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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Those who dance the dance must look very foolish to those who can't hear the music
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post #33 of 50
Thread Starter 
[quote]Originally posted by The Toolboi:
<strong>european cars are kind of the middle ground,
Dont remember where I heard it, but supposedly some European car company is designing a straight out desil car (no fuel cells or anything) that gets 1000 miles on a gallon of desil.
THAT is efficient.

Now if only we could get fuel cells in cars...</strong><hr></blockquote>

wow, thats impressive
damn efficient--kiks the crap outta the hybrids
but they need it alot more over there, w/ the feul prices being so high...
prolly BMW...i wouldnt count on mercedes to be that innovative in that regard...
or maybe VW...
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
post #34 of 50
ahem... did someone say BMW?

post #35 of 50
Thread Starter 
[quote]Originally posted by Jonathan:
<strong>ahem... did someone say BMW?

</strong><hr></blockquote>

hey jonny, start a car thread--ill give u more info than ud ever want

<img src="graemlins/smokin.gif" border="0" alt="[Chilling]" />
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
post #36 of 50
I think the line "The New Mayor of Truckville" is pretty lame.

The Tiger Woods commercials aren't bad but the tagline "It's All Good" is awful- some lame Detroit marketing type trying to sound cool. Pathetic.

G4Dude- do read AutoExtremist?
"..do you remember where you parked the car?"
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"..do you remember where you parked the car?"
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post #37 of 50
Thread Starter 
[quote]Originally posted by tmp:
<strong>I think the line "The New Mayor of Truckville" is pretty lame.
</strong><hr></blockquote>

yeah, no joke dude
they were playing that damn piece of crap at every home football game here this season...
such a POS...
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
"If it weren't for my horse...I wouldn't have spent that year in college."

"If curling is an olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery. If anything, oral sex should be an olympic sport...cause it's...
Reply
post #38 of 50
[quote]Originally posted by tmp:
<strong>I think the line "The New Mayor of Truckville" is pretty lame.

The Tiger Woods commercials aren't bad but the tagline "It's All Good" is awful- some lame Detroit marketing type trying to sound cool. Pathetic.

G4Dude- do read AutoExtremist?</strong><hr></blockquote>

No, why?
I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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post #39 of 50
I forgot about the Windows XP ads. The iPod ad does a better job showing what it can do than those. Since when can an OS let people fly?
post #40 of 50
Oh stop it...if Apple actually got off their ass and released an OS X commercials where people were flying around and so forth, you guys would be creaming your jeans and straining your noggins trying to come up with all the kudos and superlatives you could fling its way.

"Man, that Apple commercial kicks ASS! People all flying around and shit..."

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