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Joke Thread

post #1 of 7
Thread Starter 
While visiting England, George W Bush is invited to tea with the Queen.

He asks her what her leadership philosophy is.

She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.

He asks how she knows if they're intelligent.

"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."

She phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"

Tony Blair responds, "That would be me, ma'am."

"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen.

She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"

"Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"

Upon returning to Washington, Bush decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."

"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"

"Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Helms hums and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?"

Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and hey puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem.

"Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course!"

Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!"

Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, Helms. You're fired! It's Tony Blair!"

[ 04-08-2002: Message edited by: tonton ]</p>
post #2 of 7
[quote]Originally posted by tonton:"[/QB]<hr></blockquote>


Ha Ha. Funny. Stooopid. Night.
I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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post #3 of 7
Thread Starter 
Q. How many Surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. The fish.
post #4 of 7
The Queen Mother is in heaven and spots Princess Diana.

The QM says to God, "I want a halo like hers!".

God says, "That's not a halo. That's a steering wheel".

Too early for QM jokes?? <img src="graemlins/hmmm.gif" border="0" alt="[Hmmm]" />

J :cool:
post #5 of 7
Haha... too early? not if you have a sick sense of humor.
No, the bazaar cannot satisfy users. Neither can the cathedral. Nothing can satisfy users, because software is written to enable rather than satisfy, and because most users are mewling malcontents...
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No, the bazaar cannot satisfy users. Neither can the cathedral. Nothing can satisfy users, because software is written to enable rather than satisfy, and because most users are mewling malcontents...
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post #6 of 7
Too early for Queen Mother jokes? I think its still too early for Princess Diana jokes. Didn't you know that its 22.3 years before something tragic is funny.

AIDS is now officially funny
Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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post #7 of 7
Right you are. I can't wait until OJ Simpson joke are funny. Wait, they're funny now!
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