Originally Posted by sheff
Makes me feel very fuzzy when I hear an innovation based company valued on the same scale of economic importance as an Oil Company. I hope we move away from oil and let those oil companies die as soon as possible.
I, Hydrogen, simple mortal, hereby testify in the front of Heaven that this is the true, complete and unaltered record of the prophecy that the Orbe of time transmitted to my iPad on the Patmos island (Sorry, no, I was unable to trace back the IP address of the sender ...). May Heaven grant me to live long enough to see the fulfilment of this prophecy !!!!
Autumn 2010 : Apple announces quarterly results which show a 50 Billion Dollar revenue / 20 Billion Dollar profits trajectory. The analysts revise their expectations ..
Spring 2011 : after the iPad and the iPhone are introduced in China, a specific Verizon CDMA model is introduced for the US. The competitors announce models "soon to come", but fail to materialize ... Analysts revise their expectations again..
The analysts start to realize that instead of the iPad (now sold at more than three million per month) cannibalizing the Macs, each product or service of the Apple ecosystem strengthens each other, and that Apple is eating up every year a percentage of the huge PC market share. They revise their expectations accordingly ..
Autumn 2012 : Apple reinvents the watch: iWatch (human skin surface currents being used to transmit information to earphones. At that time, rumors already circulated that Apple was secretly working on a way to convey the audio information directly to the brain. Other rumors from sources (which insisted to remain unidentified) also speculated that Apple was working on the most secret project of its history (code name Wozniak), aiming at implementing a neuronal version of the iOS into the human brain (the only minor remaining technical difficulty being to implement into the human brain a 5.1 encoded audio information into the human brain).
Summer 2011 : Steve Jobs announces that a few billion Dollars out of Apple's cash will be used to launch Apple's largest private satellite constellation (this representing a tiny proportion of Apple's total cash). TV broadscasters feel uncomfortable ..
Spring 2012 : Apple reinvents the TV : iTV (British shareholders of ITV, the managers of which had previously expressed irritation about the use of this acronym, enthusiastically accept Apple's generous offer). The TV broadcasting industry understand that its destiny is sealed, and consists in being cut into tiny bits...
Summer 2013 : Apple reinvents the credit card : Steve announces that the iPhone now fully possesses credit card capabilities (with of course sophisticated authentication capabilities, and added value services for budget management, etc ...), and announces the creation of the Apple iBank. Although Banking companies publicly minimize the announcement, they infact are terrorized, as they know that Apple's gigantic cash makes this situation very dangerous for them.
Spring 2014 : the Apple profits have now jumped to the incredible amount of 40 Billion Dollars a year, turning Apple shares into the largest stock among any companies in the world (beyond Exxon Mobil or Petrochina). Analysts again revise their expectations ..
Summer 2014 : Apple chief financial Officer (R Oppenheimer) manages to convince Steve that the only way to reduce Apple's enormous cash (on which the US government is starting to look at in a somewhat threatening way) would be to distribute a dividend to the shareholders. The Apple share skyrockets again ..
Spring 2015 : Apple acquires Intel. The analysts ...
Apple competitors feel increasingly worried, and find no way to navigate safely through the mine fields of Apple patents (the Lawyers department of Apple has grown up to ten thousand of people, becoming the first department of the company). Sadly for them, they have no hope to expect from the antitrust authorities, since Apple, not being he dominant player in any of its markets, due to its vertical integration model, is out of reach.
Following IBM's historical example, PC suppliers quit one by one the PC market, into which they have no hope to make any decent profit (especially since the competition on prices has become even tougher, as the Windows market share shrinks ..).
Microsoft is in trouble.. (Especially since Steve's pitbull buddy Larry Ellison has successfully sued Google and Microsoft companies about Java (plus various other things), has aggressively and successfully promoted Open Office against Microsoft Office, and engaged a strategic partnership with Apple very dangerous for Microsoft in the professional business market.
Steve Ballmer is fired. Apple uses the old Microsoft video of the "iPhone4 funerals" (pathetic episode, inconcievable for such a large company) to celebrate the news. Dell runs out of business (and distributes the money to its shareholders (who immediately buy Apple shares with it).
Spring 2015 : Steve announces that from now on, the Apple enormous cash + the revenues driven from immaterial content (advertising, music, films, newspapers ..) enable the company to distribute its electronic consumer products for free
Autumn 2016 : in a keynote which will forever remain in the anthology, Steve Jobs reveal that Apple reinvents the car : iCar (yes, it is a mobile device, too ). the automotive industry is terrorized ...
Summer 2019 : the «*water party*» candidate to the US Presidency (tea party follow up, even more aggressive republican sect (yes, it is possible ...)) announces Apple's dismantling in case he/she is elected. Steve Jobs is successfully (without any campaign, as the other candidates withdraw for him) designated as Democrat candidate to the election.
2020 : Apple reinvents the Presidency of the United States :Steve Jobs is elected president of the United States (reachhing majority of votes in all states, including Texas), but insists for its salary to be one dollar / year only (first iPresident of the United States).
At that time, Steve's popularity is so great that most American people convert to Zen Buddhism, and are no longer interested in profit making. The National Riffle Association (NRA) turns itself into the National reconciliation Association, and now promotes non-violence. Apple Stores throughout the world (even China agrees) are converted with little modifications into Zen Buddhist temples (the Logo stays, the tables and Apple products are removed, the Genius bar employees are trained to become spiritual advisors).
2030 : Apple reinvents the religion : after a carreer as a business man & a politician, Steve Jobs reaches the final (and probably the most successful) accomplishment of his life in being a religious leader. Flying throughout the world with his Gulfstream, he preaches successfully Zen Buddhism through "spiritual keynotes" in a climate of religious fervor which cannot even be described, and manages to convert very unlikely disciples (such as Arnold Schwarzenegger & Larry Ellison (who decides to give his entire fortune to charity funds, and to spend the rest of his life in the street of San Francisco as a beggar)).
2031 : after a second unsuccessful liver transplantation, Steve Jobs dies. Like Prometheus (who, according to ancient Greek Mythology, was condemned to have his liver perpetullay destroyed and then regenerated, for having stolen the fire from the Olympus, and having given it to the human), Steve Jobs, after having given the Mac to the human, therefore had similar destiny.