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The not so well thought out pickup lines thread

post #1 of 57
Thread Starter 
I was thinking about lame pickup lines after watching Blind Date last night. So let's post some. I'll go first.

-"Does yo daddy clean outhouses? Cause you da shit."

-"Is yo daddy a terrorist? Cause you da bomb."

-"They call me el gringo grande."

-if in a chatroom: "wanna cyber?" Actually that's pretty lame when not in a chatroom too.

-"Hi I'm -----. I live with my dad."

-Motion a girl over by waving your finger. "I just made you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with 5."

Ok someone else's turn.

[ 07-12-2002: Message edited by: G4Dude ]</p>
I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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I have a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell.
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post #2 of 57
"Hi, I'm called Noah."
meh
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meh
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post #3 of 57
a/s/l
You cannot conquer Ireland. You cannot extinguish
the Irish passion for freedom. If our deed has not
been sufficient to win freedom, then our children
will win it by a better deed.
Pádraig Pearse

...
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You cannot conquer Ireland. You cannot extinguish
the Irish passion for freedom. If our deed has not
been sufficient to win freedom, then our children
will win it by a better deed.
Pádraig Pearse

...
Reply
post #4 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Harald:
<strong>"Hi, I'm called Noah."</strong><hr></blockquote>

ROFL!

 

“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.” 
-Sagan
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“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.” 
-Sagan
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post #5 of 57
Are those space pants you're wearing? Cause your butt is out of this world.
Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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post #6 of 57
"Meh, you'll do."

 

“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.” 
-Sagan
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“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.” 
-Sagan
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post #7 of 57
Yo Baby, you be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King, you treat me right, and I'll do it your way, right away. <img src="graemlins/smokin.gif" border="0" alt="[Chilling]" />
I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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post #8 of 57
damn girl, is yo daddy a bakah, cuz u got some nice buns?

another 1:

girl let's have a math lesson. me plus you, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and let's multiply.

[ 07-12-2002: Message edited by: thuh Freak ]</p>
post #9 of 57
Good thing i didn't forget my library card, cuz I'm a checking you out!
post #10 of 57
"that dress sure is becoming on you....but then if i was on you i'd be coming too"

[ 07-12-2002: Message edited by: thegelding ]</p>
it's all fun till somebody loses an eye
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it's all fun till somebody loses an eye
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post #11 of 57
If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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post #12 of 57
Well, I'm here. So what are your other two wishes?
I was promised flying cars. Where are the flying cars?
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I was promised flying cars. Where are the flying cars?
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post #13 of 57


G4Dude touches on something I've noticed lately: there ARE about 14,000 "reality dating" shows on TV these days: Blind Date, Shipmates, ElimiDate, that one where they switch partners, MTV has one, the Learning Channel has one (!), etc.

And they're HORRIBLE. Ohmigosh, it's a wonder ANYONE is getting laid these days.

I'm not actively "out there, in the scene" (don't really want, or have, to be...), so is this an accurate depiction of how most 20-something gel-haired guys act?

I watch these shows sometimes (flipping around the tube) and these guys are completely ridiculous. About as deep as an eraser, all hoked up with beer muscles, half-ass attempt at the hip Facial Hair of the Moment and a very unbecoming shirt (usually a sparkly, spangly thing that's about 2 sizes too small and self-consciously "retro" and "hip").

You know the type. So out-of-their-way manly and studly that you just KNOW they're mere STEPS away from full-tilt homosexuality, and they're using this show as a last-ditch effort to try and convince themselves they're straight.

<img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laughing]" />

Holy hell.

:eek:

And the WOMEN! S H A L L O W B I T C H I N E S S, overanalyzing everything, talking non-stop about yourself, making yourself look put-upon and "stressed out" (because you gained 11 ounces over two years and seem to think THAT'S why you can't find a good man) and using the word "like" 11 times in two sentences is NOT attractive, ladies.

Just thought someone should let you know...



I'm surrounded by idiots, knuckledraggers, dirty dancers, drunks, pinheads, vomit queens, condom collectors, half-wits, chuckleheads, silicone sisters, braindead Matchbox Twenty listeners and standard issue dipshits and clue-lackers.

It's a beautiful world...so glad to be a part of it!

<img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laughing]" />
post #14 of 57
"Don't you post on AI?"
meh
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meh
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post #15 of 57
you want to get a pizza and fvck?

what's a matter, you don't like pizza?
post #16 of 57
Top Ten Worst Pick Up Lines at MIT

10)Do you really think I'm as sexy as Mr. Spock?

9)I think the electricity between you and me is throwing off the experiment.

8)I like your Maxwell's Equations t-shirt. I'd like it even better on my bedroom floor.

7)I'll see what I can do about your grade. (TA's only)

6)You know what they say about the size of man's calculator.

5)I make excellent use of my hard drive.

4)I hear the junior physics laboratory is gorgeous by moonlight.

3)I always carry protection--You never know when a pen might leak.

2)Hey baby, what's your sine?

1)I don't need your number, I'll just finger you later.
I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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I AM THE Royal Pain in the Ass.
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post #17 of 57
"Wanna see my Barbie collection?"

post #18 of 57
is that a ladder in your pocket, or a stairway to heaven?
post #19 of 57
[quote]1)I don't need your number, I'll just finger you later.<hr></blockquote>

you know, for the one Unix aware chick you can find that might actually work, assuming she knew what you meant.

LOL, that one rules.
post #20 of 57
This thread reminds me of (not only my lame a** dating days) but of the scene in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back where Jay is getting sweet with whatsername using foul language. She says "can't you call me something sweet?" and he says "Ok. Boo boo kitty......fvck?"
I fell over. That's what I call my wife now. She is amused with it, for now.

Thoth
You can fly?!?
No. Jump good.
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You can fly?!?
No. Jump good.
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post #21 of 57
Is there a mirror in your pocket, cause I can see myself in your pants.
Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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Be quiet, Brain, or I'll stab you with a Q-tip
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post #22 of 57
"Palestinians or Israelis: who do you reckon is in the right, baby?"
meh
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meh
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post #23 of 57
"wanna fuc?"
post #24 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Harald:
<strong>"Palestinians or Israelis: who do you reckon is in the right, baby?"</strong><hr></blockquote>

Dimwit.
post #25 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by PC^KILLA:
<strong>

Dimwit.</strong><hr></blockquote>

If you don't think that (even handed) line is THE SINGLE WORST chat-up line ever, then my comments about the utter poverty of your sex-life in the "Dirty Bomb" thread simply must be true.

Cuz you're getting NONE.



[ 07-12-2002: Message edited by: Harald ]</p>
meh
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meh
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post #26 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Harald:
<strong>

If you don't think that (even handed) line is THE SINGLE WORST chat-up line ever, then my comments about the utter poverty of your sex-life in the "Dirty Bomb" thread simply must be true.

Cuz you're getting NONE.



[ 07-12-2002: Message edited by: Harald ]</strong><hr></blockquote>


No. I just think ur a dimwit.
post #27 of 57
Oops. Just saw Harald making the exact same point

[ 07-12-2002: Message edited by: Anders ]</p>
"I reject your reality and substitute it with my own" - President Bush
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"I reject your reality and substitute it with my own" - President Bush
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post #28 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Anders:
<strong>

You gotta show the ladies some respect mika <img src="graemlins/oyvey.gif" border="0" alt="[No]" /> </strong><hr></blockquote>


heheh, ... Harald didya hear that? Have you been able to achieve those orgasms lately?
post #29 of 57
<img src="confused.gif" border="0">
"I reject your reality and substitute it with my own" - President Bush
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"I reject your reality and substitute it with my own" - President Bush
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post #30 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by PC^KILLA:
<strong>


heheh, ... Harald didya hear that? Have you been able to achieve those orgasms lately?</strong><hr></blockquote>

Must the Israel/Palestine conflict intrude on every discussion in AO. Get back to the thread topic.
20" iMac G5, 2 GB Ram, OS X 10.4.11, .Mac
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20" iMac G5, 2 GB Ram, OS X 10.4.11, .Mac
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post #31 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Anders:
<strong> :confused: </strong><hr></blockquote>

Twiddle dim and twiddle dumb... <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laughing]" />
post #32 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by gobble gobble:
<strong>

Must the Israel/Palestine conflict intrude on every discussion in AO. Get back to the thread topic.</strong><hr></blockquote>


k.

So what's the first thing that a nice girl does when she wakes in the morning?
post #33 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by gobble gobble:
<strong>

Must the Israel/Palestine conflict intrude on every discussion in AO. Get back to the thread topic.</strong><hr></blockquote>

I agree.

Er...

"You remind me of my mum."
post #34 of 57
"Can I buy you a... goddamn, I've just ejaculated."
post #35 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by PC^KILLA:
<strong>


k.

So what's the first thing that a nice girl does when she wakes in the morning?</strong><hr></blockquote>

... she goes home.

(So what does the not so nice girl do? She stays )
post #36 of 57
You know, speaking as a coprophiliac...
post #37 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Hassan i-Sabbah:
<strong>You know, speaking as a coprophiliac...</strong><hr></blockquote>

:eek: :eek:

holly sh*t!!!
dude, ur scaring me ... <img src="graemlins/bugeye.gif" border="0" alt="[Skeptical]" />
post #38 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by PC^KILLA:
<strong>

:eek: :eek:

holly sh*t!!!
dude, ur scaring me ... <img src="graemlins/bugeye.gif" border="0" alt="[Skeptical]" /> </strong><hr></blockquote>

'Holy shit' is indeed quite apt.
post #39 of 57
Okay, I just looked the word up and have to chime in with the "you're scaring me" crowd also!

Ugh!

post #40 of 57
[quote]Originally posted by Hassan i-Sabbah:
<strong>You know, speaking as a coprophiliac...</strong><hr></blockquote>

Dude, that's sick <img src="graemlins/oyvey.gif" border="0" alt="[No]" />

J :cool:
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