Originally Posted by tonton
She's 12, she got into the best secondary school in Hong Kong based solely on merit, and I don't need to count the pocket change we leave around the house. She's a little lazy with homework, but other than that her worst problem is forgetting her housekey.
Yet you don't endorse a society that runs on merit. How many students should be promoted ahead of your daughter regardless of their grades or performance on exams just because of a desire for diversity or due to being disadvantaged?
Originally Posted by sammi jo
Perhaps, as a non-teacher, as well as someone who doesn't have kids, I am less qualified to venture a thought on this...
But it appears than many parents seem to disregard boundaries, re. kids, and allow them to do whatever they want, sometime to the point of running the household... ie everything revolves around the kid(s)' wants (rather than needs). The kid then develops expectations outside of the home environment, and when things don't work out accordingly, then trouble ensues. IMHO, a light spanking is OK as long as it is done as a *last*
resort, in a direct response to the infraction, and immediately explained by the parents to the kid, and not "formalized" into a premeditated, formalized "ritual" punishment.
Then there's this: kids don't come with an "instruction manual". Although parenting skills (should) come instinctively, there's a correlation between problem kids and uneducated parents. What are the solutions...? And is society bothered enough to place this issue on the totem of priorities?
This kid certainly disregarded boundaries.
You can hear the whiny girl defending him after he had licked glass, cursed out the teacher, and was physically intimidating her.
The other aspect of this is it only considers one type of aggression. People, Groverat specifically used to get upset about all the I used to post about female violence because it was not physical violence. Yet more and more is being written about and understood with regard to relational aggression.
It is also understood that not only females do it, but regardless of who does it, it is a form of aggression.
Here are forms of it which studies like those on spanking seldom deal with.
Betrayal Where the abuser breaks agreements with the victim.
Exclusion/Solitude Where the abuser prevents the victim from socializing with the abuser's friends.
Gossip Where the abuser tells others personal information about the victim.
Humiliation Where the abuser humiliates or shames the victim in front of others.
Lies Where the abuser lies about the victim to others.
The kid in the video above declares and may in fact have never laid a hand on that teacher, but failed to see, as society does, that he was still practicing aggression in half a dozen different forms and that aggression and violence can be rendered unto others without lifting a finger.