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What's Steve gonna chuck this time?

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
Last time on Macworld Expo Bloopers, our man Steve, in a fit of rage, pitched a flaky digital camera at an unsuspecting underling, and later blamed it on the batteries.

What's Steve gonna chuck this Macworld - and what is he gonna blame it on?

[ 12-31-2001: Message edited by: The Mactivist ]

[ 12-31-2001: Message edited by: The Mactivist ]</p>
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post #2 of 23
his evian water bottle.. he's gona blame evian
post #3 of 23
An iMac when it crashes... Yes, he will pick up a nice heavy iMac, and thrust it to the 22nd row...
post #4 of 23
He'll chuck Schiller off the stage. :eek:
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post #5 of 23
Maybe they'll introduce the iFrisbee?
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post #6 of 23
"I think we have had enough of this big, bulky iMac..."

*Loud crash, screams*
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post #7 of 23
Hardware weight issue:
  • While showing off the wonderful multimedia capabilities of the new iMac, Steve fidgets too much and causes the super-light iMac to tumble backwards. Incensed, Steve picks the iMac up by the handle and hurls it at Jonathan Ives, yelling, "Hey Ives, maybe you shouldn't be such a smart aleck and make this thing heavier instead!"

    (replace iMac with PowerMacs for more drama)

PowerMac stutters while playing QuickTime movies at HD quality:
  • Steve tries to show off the new PowerMac's processing power, and what better way than to play huge high-quality movies on the new 52" Apple Plasma Cinema Display? Unfortunately, the G5 in the PowerMac couldn't keep up with all the I/O (Steve was burning a DVD, ripping a CD, crunching RC5 and SETI data, and downloading MP3s at the same time), and drops a couple of frames. Ever the perfectionist, Steve picks up the new PowerMac enclosure (made extra-light by space materials) and hurls it at (guess who?) Jon Rubinstein while cursing. He then turns to the audience, and calmly says, "Oh yeah and that's our new casing."

[edit: formatting]

[ 12-31-2001: Message edited by: catalyst ]</p>
post #8 of 23
I thought he might do that with the iPod - show it's skip free operation...
post #9 of 23
He didn't "chuck" anything. He tossed the digital camera (which bounced) offstage to someone to have it fixed (or figured out, 'cause he couldn't).
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post #10 of 23
deleted.. too stupid

[ 12-31-2001: Message edited by: David R ]</p>
post #11 of 23
[quote]Originally posted by crawlingparanoia:
<strong>He didn't "chuck" anything. He tossed the digital camera (which bounced) offstage to someone to have it fixed (or figured out, 'cause he couldn't).</strong><hr></blockquote>

Come on, its obvious that Steve's a little irked and that he "tosses" the camera with a bit of force. Looks and sounds like chucking to me...
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post #12 of 23
IIRC, Steve used a girlie underhand "toss"
post #13 of 23
Steve's gonna hurl himself into the crowd in a body surfing wave of euphoria over the unveiling of the new iMac!
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post #14 of 23
Have you guys been out of the Rumor mill lately???

Sheesh....

He's gonna but-kick RYAN MEADER into the crowd...
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post #15 of 23
Adobe CEO Bruce Chizen, after Steve tries to do his Mac OSX vs. Win XP Photoshop bake-off using a quad G5 when... d'oh!
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post #16 of 23
Thread Starter 
I think he's going to drop kick Meg Ryan off the stage for mentioning the G5 without sufficient RDF training. I mean like, she mentions it only ONCE and didn't even say 'amazing, super or incredible! ' The nerve!
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post #17 of 23
[quote]Originally posted by Matsu:
<strong>Steve's gonna hurl himself into the crowd in a body surfing wave of euphoria over the unveiling of the new iMac!</strong><hr></blockquote>

Best post Matsu!

I propose we all start chanting STEVE!, STEVE!, STEVE!, STEVE!, STEVE!, STEVE!, until he complies with our wishes.
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post #18 of 23
Of course if the new iMac is lame and expensive, and there is no G5, we can still use the same chant...
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post #19 of 23
I think we have to make a bundle

He straps a G5 onto Meg Ryan and hurls her and it at Ryan Meader on his way out of the room stealing one of the new iMacs to be able to be the first to put it on the web. Thus making a G5 iMac MegRyanMeader special edition. And THEN Jobs crowdsurfs.
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post #20 of 23
hehe... Can we have him bitch-slap Bill Gates too?

"And now, to introduce the all new OfficeX, already shipping, please welcome Bill Gates"

crowd cheers. They've learned their lesson, not to boo MS execs anymore.

"WTF? You guys are cheering? Bill come o'er here"

"Yes?"

[Steve Bitch slaps Bill]

"Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present you the all new, gorgeous and incredibly fast, Apple CyberDogII and MacOSX86."

"buut... I... don't..."

"Shut up Bill"


OK, forget about this one
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post #21 of 23
Steve: "Phil, it is time for that final thrilling demo... To demonstrate that this iMac flat-panel display is made of the same polycarbonates as bullet proof glass, I want you to hold this pesky malfunctioning one in front of your chest while I fire a few brisk rounds at it from my trusty .357 Magnum that I just happen to have here for the occasion..."

Phil: "Thanks Steve, the great thing about my job is I get to do fun things like this, which is even better than my last stunt, jumping on a trampoline with an iBook!"
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post #22 of 23
He will chuck workerbee (That was part of the settlement) and every other "insider" he can find, into a iWood chipper.
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post #23 of 23
[quote]Originally posted by MacAddict:
<strong>"I think we have had enough of this big, bulky iMac..."

*Loud crash, screams*</strong><hr></blockquote>

He just might do that
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