I've reached a point where I feel the need to express my disappointment with Random Complaint Generator. Let me get to the crux of the matter: We must work together to present a clear picture of what is happening, what has happened, and what is likely to happen in the future. What can you do to help? For starters, you might want to put to rest puerile and complacent machinations such as Random Complaint Generator's. I personally derive great satisfaction in doing that sort of thing because Random Complaint Generator motivates people to join its band by using words like "humanity", "compassion", and "unity". This is a great deception. What Random Complaint Generator really wants to do is perpetuate harmful stereotypes. That's why Random Complaint Generator says that it is not only acceptable, but indeed desirable, to turn the trickle of libertinism into a tidal wave. That's a stupid thing to say. It's like saying that it is its moral imperative to exploit the feelings of charity and guilt that many people have over the plight of the homeless. Random Complaint Generator's dishonest personal attacks convince me of only one thing: that mass anxiety is the equivalent of steroids for Random Complaint Generator. If we feel helpless, Random Complaint Generator is energized and ramps up its efforts to feed blind hatred.
Random Complaint Generator has a deep conviction that governments should have the right to lie to their own subjects or to other governments. Why is that relevant to this letter? Because it truly believes that it has mystical powers of divination and prophecy. It is just such incompetent megalomania, hotheaded egoism, and intellectual aberrancy that stirs Random Complaint Generator to make my worst nightmares come true. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe Random Complaint Generator's deeds are Holy Writ. Admittedly, that's about as likely as Elvis materializing in my room tonight and singing Heartbreak Hotel. Still, the possibility does help one realize that I want to oppose evil wherever it rears its cruel head. But first, let me pose an abstract question. Why do we put up with Random Complaint Generator? I'll tell you the answer in a moment. But first, let me just say that the irony is that Random Complaint Generator's most execrable crusades are also its most humorless. As the French say, "Les extremes se touchent."
I plan to work within the system to persuade my fellow citizens that I, hardheaded cynic that I am, can't let Random Complaint Generator threaten, degrade, poison, bulldoze, and kill this world of ours, not because I lack the courage for more drastic steps, but because I have to wonder where it got the idea that it is my view that the moon is made of green cheese. This sits hard with me because it is simply not true and I've never written anything to imply that it is. This seems so obvious, I am amazed there is even any discussion about it. To tolerate Random Complaint Generator's inimical, mentally deficient perversions simply because they're not packaged and sold as snivelling is to suborn raucous, meddlesome guttersnipes to preach hatred. Anyone who follows today's debates on metagrobolism and, by happenstance, is also familiar with Random Complaint Generator's impulsive initiatives, is struck by that old truism: Random Complaint Generator's roorbacks are continually evolving into more and more domineering incarnations. Here, I'm not just talking about evolution in a simply Darwinist sense; I'm also talking about how Random Complaint Generator might galvanize a neurotic hysteria, a large-scale version of the lackadaisical mentality that can cause one-sided flimflams to be entered into historical fact, sooner than you think. What are we to do then? Place blinders over our eyes and hope we don't see the horrible outcome?
If you don't think that a lot of people may end up getting hurt before the final spasm of Random Complaint Generator's rage is played out, then you've missed the whole point of this letter. Random Complaint Generator's conduct can be described as less than perfect. What are the lessons for us in this? First, it's that I don't enjoy its bawdy sense of humor. And second, there is no doubt that it will use organized violence to suppress opposition eventually. Believe me, I would give everything I own to be wrong on that point, but the truth is that Random Complaint Generator may reduce human beings to the status of domestic animals right after it reads this letter. Let it. When you least expect it, I will maximize our individual potential for effectiveness and success in combatting Random Complaint Generator.
This is not to say that inequality does not beget equality. It is merely to point out that corporatism has served as the justification for the butchering, torture, and enslavement of more people than any other "ism". That's why it's Random Complaint Generator's favorite; it makes it easy for it to dress up its profit motive in the cloak of selfless altruism. Though I don't doubt the depth of Random Complaint Generator's sentiments, it's rather the form of its expressions that I find both laughable and birdbrained. What is often overlooked, however, is that Random Complaint Generator's underlings all have serious personal problems. In fact, the way it keeps them loyal to it is by encouraging and exacerbating these problems rather than by helping to overcome them.
To initiate a reign of footling terror has never been something that I wanted to do. Never. The gloss that Random Complaint Generator's fans put on Random Complaint Generator's homilies unfortunately does little to act honorably. Our attempts to protect our peace, privacy, and safety have so far served only as a divertissement for Random Complaint Generator and its allies. This means, in particular, that I, hardheaded cynic that I am, have a scientist's respect for objective truth. That's why I'm telling you that if you read Random Complaint Generator's writings while mentally out of focus, you may get the sense that children should belong to the state. But if you read its writings while mentally in focus and weigh each point carefully, it's clear that if it thinks that it can make me drop to my knees and beg for mercy, then it's barking up the wrong tree.
What may seem insignificant or humorous to Random Complaint Generator is often hurtful and confusing to others. Of course, it's not quite that simple. Random Complaint Generator's zingers manifest themselves in two phases. Phase one: fill the air with recrimination and rancor. Phase two: show us a gross miscarriage of common judgment. While Random Complaint Generator is undoubtedly entitled to ignore good advice from intelligent people, it claims to have turned over a new leaf shortly after getting caught trying to advocate its precepts amid a hue and cry as disaffected as it is bookish. This claim is an outright lie that is still being circulated by Random Complaint Generator's deputies. The truth is that I admit I have a tendency to become a bit insensitive whenever I rebuke Random Complaint Generator for trying to declare martial law, suspend elections, and round up dissidents (i.e., anyone who does not buy its lie that the ideas of "freedom" and "plagiarism" are Siamese twins). While I am desirous of mending this tiny personality flaw, it's not the boogeyman that our children need to worry about. It's Random Complaint Generator. Not only is Random Complaint Generator more scornful and more detestable than any envisaged boogeyman or bugbear, but by allowing Random Complaint Generator to subordinate all spheres of society to an ideological vision of organic community, we are allowing it to play puppet master.
Plan to join Random Complaint Generator's camp? Be sure to check your conscience at the door. Unless we overcome the obstacles that people like Random Complaint Generator establish, our whole social structure will gradually disintegrate and crumble into ruins. It is painful to write such truisms, but Random Complaint Generator believes that the rest of us are an inferior group of people, fit only to be enslaved, beaten, and butchered at the whim of our betters. Sorry, but I have to call foul on that one. I would like to register my strong objection to Random Complaint Generator's jeremiads. Yes, I could add that the common denominator of all of its screeds is that they seek to allow federally funded research to mushroom into a sick, grossly inefficient system, hampered by vile antagonists and combative trolls, but I wanted to keep my message simple and direct. I didn't want to distract you from the main thrust of my message, which is that the real question here is not, "Whatever happened to community standards?". The real question is rather, "What accounts for Random Complaint Generator's prodigious criminality and dissipation?" As you no doubt realize, that's a particulary timely question. In fact, just half an hour ago, I heard someone express the opinion that I have frequently criticized Random Complaint Generator's unspoken plan to rifle, pillage, plunder, and loot. It usually addresses my criticisms by accusing me of credentialism, onanism, child molestation, and halitosis. Random Complaint Generator hopes that by delegitimizing me this way, no one will listen to me when I say that Random Complaint Generator's hypocrisy is transparent. Even the least discerning among us can see right through it.
I frequently talk about how Random Complaint Generator's writings exhibit a disregard, not merely for style, but for the truth. I would drop the subject, except that what it is doing is not an innocent, recreational sort of thing. It is a criminal activity, it is an immoral activity, it is a socially destructive activity, and it is a profoundly hateful activity. Incidentally, Random Complaint Generator and its dupes are brain-damaged troglodytes. This is not set down in complaint against them, but merely as analysis. You know what I mean? In the end, we have to ask, "To what lengths will Random Complaint Generator go to replace the search for truth with a situationist relativism based on libidinous antipluralism?" To help answer that question I will offer a single anecdote. A few weeks ago, I overheard some unpatriotic, depraved gutter-dweller tell everyone who passed by that violence and prejudice are funny. Astounded, I asked this person if he realized that Random Complaint Generator's prognoses are a masterpiece of paltry, cankered feudalism. Not only was his answer "no" but it was also news to him that if I withheld my feelings on this matter, I'd be no less crass than Random Complaint Generator. Random Complaint Generator's insinuations are a house of mirrors. How are we to find the opening that leads to freedom? While I don't know the answer to that particular question, I do know that the problem with Random Complaint Generator is not that it's uncouth. It's that it wants to teach grotesque concepts to children.
Whether or not Random Complaint Generator should leave a large part of this country's workforce dislocated and disillusioned ought to be a simple question, far beyond the realm of debate. However, we must remove our chains and move towards the light. (In case you didn't understand that analogy, the chains symbolize Random Complaint Generator's resentful whinges, and the light represents the goal of getting all of us to condemn -- without hesitation, without remorse -- all those who muzzle Random Complaint Generator's critics.) Random Complaint Generator would have us believe that its army of morally crippled scofflaws is looking out for our best interests. Yeah, right. Finally, to those of you who are faithfully helping me step back and consider the problem of Random Complaint Generator's expostulations in the larger picture of popular culture imagery, let me extend, as always, my deepest gratitude and my most affectionate regards.
To save time, assume I know everything.
To save time, assume I know everything.
... or 501 now 
err... 502 then? Oh whichever. Happy 1000 to you, and a Happy New Year to everyone... I'm about 22 hours away from 2007 though...
Otherwise I could actually digest some of this utraflamboyantistic languagesneessses.
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