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post #41 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter

Maybe his shift and apostrophe keys are broken.

I thought he was just being an intentionally annoying, tongue-in-cheek smart arse but it starting to look like he's serious.

But then Hassan has already told me I am something that comes out the end of a penis so I guess the hate was there already.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #42 of 149
k going to the gym now where i can be stupid.

you adults have fun.
post #43 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post

Maybe his shift and apostrophe keys are broken.

grammarmaster308 owns his house, 2 cars, a motorcycle, and a kid. surely he can afford a functioning keyboard!

post #44 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

I thought he was just being an intentionally annoying, tongue-in-cheek smart arse but it starting to look like he's serious.

But then Hassan has already told me I am something that comes out the end of a penis so I guess the hate was there already.

No, my love, you're not something that comes out of the end of a penis.

You're something that accrues around the end of a penis if you don't pay attention to your personal hygiene. Knobcheese can have many sources: semen must be one of the most significant components, granted, but urine, sweat, lint and chip fat can all play a part too.

So I'm told (circumcised.)

And yeah, it's OK to use two commas, I'm being a knobcheese. I'm objecting to

"Chester's dog, Bob is smarter than midwinter's dog, Molly."

I hate that.

"Chester's dog, Bob, is smarter than midwinter's dog, Molly."

That's fine.

Poor Molly.

Hey, trailmaster, reading is fun and impresses girls!
post #45 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hassan

You're something that accrues around the end of a penis if you don't pay attention to your personal hygiene. Knobcheese can have many sources: semen must be one of the most significant components, granted, but urine, sweat, lint and chip fat can all play a part too.

I thought you were going to say I was like a freshly bloomed rose, bespattered with diamond dewdrops sparkling in the warm light of dawn.

I guess I had my hopes raised a little high.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #46 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShawnJ View Post

grammarmaster308 owns his house, 2 cars, a motorcycle, and a kid. surely he can afford a functioning keyboard!




i'll go find one.

collecting IP addresses is fun...
post #47 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hassan i Sabbah View Post

And yeah, it's OK to use two commas, I'm being a knobcheese.

GAH! A COMMA SPLICE!!! ". . . it's OK to use two commas; I'm being a knobcheese." is correct. Now Hassan, I know y'all Brits talk funny and all, but I know you have semicolons over there. Maybe look inside one of your castles.

Quote:
I'm objecting to

"Chester's dog, Bob is smarter than midwinter's dog, Molly."

I hate that.

"Chester's dog, Bob, is smarter than midwinter's dog, Molly."

That's fine.

The first is an error. The second is a correctly constructed appositive.
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Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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post #48 of 149
So there, Hassan.










I wonder what the fuck an apositive is.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #49 of 149
Thread Starter 
An appositive is a blood type.
Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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post #50 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by trailmaster308 View Post



i'll go find one.

collecting IP addresses is fun...

Careful laddy. Fun's fun, but there are places you don't want to go.
They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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post #51 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by addabox View Post

Careful laddy. Fun's fun, but there are places you don't want to go.

Like CC's bedroom.

Black hole of disorganization in which nothing, including Bob, can escape-- or temporal nexus where all your dreams become reality?
post #52 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShawnJ View Post

Like CC's bedroom.

Black hole of disorganization in which nothing, including Bob, can escape-- or temporal nexus where all your dreams become reality?

It has to be one or the other?
They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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post #53 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawn

ike CC's bedroom.

Black hole of disorganization in which nothing, including Bob, can escape

"From" which nothing, including Bob, can escape

Quote:
or temporal nexus where all your dreams become reality?

Depends whether you're offering to wash my undies for me or not.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #54 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by addabox View Post

It has to be one or the other?

Unless Bob is part of your dreams!

Which, uh, I didn't know about you, but I suppose that's par for the course for left-coasters.
post #55 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawn

Unless Bob is part of your dreams!

Which, uh, I didn't know about you, but I suppose that's par for the course for left-coasters.

Remember, adda, he's all man. All man, I say!
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #56 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShawnJ View Post

Unless Bob is part of your dreams!

Which, uh, I didn't know about you, but I suppose that's par for the course for left-coasters.

Myself, I swing Doodle-wards, which has less to do with left-coastedness than an unfortunate incident with an ottoman during my formative years.

Don't tell Bob or Molly.
They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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post #57 of 149
Hmmmmm.......
They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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post #58 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

Remember, adda, he's all man. All man, I say!

So you say, but have we ever seen documentary evidence?

At this time I'd like to formally apologize to the entirety of AppleInsider, if not the internet at large, for encouraging Chester to post pictures of her dog's penis.

I would also like to personally apologize to Midwinter, for having at his grammar thread, doggie style.
They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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They spoke of the sayings and doings of their commander, the grand duke, and told stories of his kindness and irascibility.
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post #59 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post

GAH! A COMMA SPLICE!!! ". . . it's OK to use two commas; I'm being a knobcheese." is correct. Now Hassan, I know y'all Brits talk funny and all, but I know you have semicolons over there. Maybe look inside one of your castles.

Ah. Yes. Well. That was intentional, actually. I was attempting to convey a sort of conversational tone, employing a deliberately insouciant grammatical caprice, if you will, la de da.

Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post


The first is an error. The second is a correctly constructed appositive.

Yes.

Crazychester is as fragrant as a morning dozing in the shade of the catalpa tree, jasmine blossom drifting on the west wind like etc.
post #60 of 149
So midwinter, since you're using your Saturdays to freelance on the internet, I've got two questions for you.

1. I've seen newspapers omit the last comma before the 'and' in a list, like "crazychester is a scoundrel, a cretin and a knobcheese." It drives me crazy. Am I wrong to be driven by crazy by this?

2. I was corrected recently when someone asked "how are you doing?" and I responded "good." They said "well" is the only appropriate answer. Needless to say, I pulled his tongue out with a pair of pliers. But was he right?
post #61 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by BRussell View Post

So midwinter, since you're using your Saturdays to freelance on the internet, I've got two questions for you.

1. I've seen newspapers omit the last comma before the 'and' in a list, like "crazychester is a scoundrel, a cretin and a knobcheese." It drives me crazy. Am I wrong to be driven by crazy by this?

That is called the "serial comma." To put it shortly, the usage pattern, which leads to the rule, is changing. I retain it, but I'm old school. In other words, you are not wrong to be driven crazy by this.

Quote:
2. I was corrected recently when someone asked "how are you doing?" and I responded "good." They said "well" is the only appropriate answer. Needless to say, I pulled his tongue out with a pair of pliers. But was he right?

He was, in fact, correct. "Good" is an adjective, which is used to describe nouns. "Well" is an adverb, which is used to modify verbs. And since the question is "how are you doing?" the answer is "well," since you are describing how you "do," which is a verb.

That'll be $5 or an answer to this question:

Assuming that there is such a thing as the Oedipal phase, would a child in a same-sex family (say, two men) go through it? I've asked three psychologists and gotten three different answers.

And lastly, shouldn't you be in bed by now?
Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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post #62 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Sprout

1. I've seen newspapers omit the last comma before the 'and' in a list, like "crazychester is a scoundrel, a cretin and a knobcheese." It drives me crazy. Am I wrong to be driven by crazy by this?

We will admit the terms "scoundrel" and "knobcheese" may be applicable on occasion, but we strenuously object to being called a "cretin" and we are most definitely not amused.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
Reply
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #63 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

We will admit the terms "scoundrel" and "knobcheese" may be applicable on occasion, but we strenuously object to being called a "cretin" and we are most definitely not amused.

I agree. Crazychester is an Aussi. A cretin would be a deformed/dwarflike person from the Alps.
Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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post #64 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post

I agree. Crazychester is an Aussi. A cretin would be a deformed/dwarflike person from the Alps.

Mais non! A cretin is a retard; to whit, a congenital retard, retardicated (or more accurately 'retardified') by a wonky thyroid gland.

Crazychester is Australian.
post #65 of 149
Oh shit. I just looked up ret... 'cretin' on the wikipedia.org website, and yes, the word 'cretin' come from the Alps.
post #66 of 149
Knobcheese?

I am offended by knobcheese!

The proper word is smegma. Good old smegma......

1.) It's a real word
2.) It's a lot of fun to say.
A good brain ain't diddly if you don't have the facts
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A good brain ain't diddly if you don't have the facts
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post #67 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flounder

Knobcheese?

I am offended by knobcheese!

The proper word is smegma. Good old smegma......

1.) It's a real word
2.) It's a lot of fun to say.

I just googled "smegma" and couldn't help but be struck by these results:





One can only assume the latter is the unfortunate result of large quantities of alcohol.

Anyway, the Wiki makes no mention of chip fat being a component of smegma. Rather, smegma seems to be a substance composed exclusively of genital secretions. This suggests that, while similar, "smegma" and "knobcheese" are in fact distinct substances.

Or maybe, Hassan's smegma is just special.

I warn you in advance that Wikipedia entry includes a picture with the caption:

"Smegma allowed to accumulate long enough to become visible."

Y'all may be interested to know that the term is one of the few English words referring to aspects of human genitalia that is of Greek and not Latin origin.


I added that last bit to try and sound as smart as midwinter. But I really just read it in the Wiki.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #68 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

Y'all may be interested to know that the term is one of the few English words referring to aspects of human genitalia that is of Greek and not Latin origin.

Clitoris is of Greek origin.

"Pussy" is, I believe, some kind of modification of a Greek word for "purse."
Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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Gangs are not seen as legitimate, because they don't have control over public schools.
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post #69 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by some dude in London

Crazychester is as fragrant as a morning dozing in the shade of the catalpa tree, jasmine blossom drifting on the west wind like etc.

1) Bloody genius, this line.

2) Obviously inspired by e. e. cummings various usages of the abbreviation "etc." For example:

Quote:
Originally Posted by edmund estlin cummings

my sweet old etcetera
aunt lucy during the recent

war could and what
is more did tell you just
what everybody was fighting

for,
my sister

isabel created hundreds
(and
hundreds) of socks not to
mention shirts fleaproof earwarmers

etcetera wristers etcetera, my

mother hoped that

i would die etcetera
bravely of course my father used
to become hoarse talking about how it was
a privilege and if only he
could meanwhile my

self etcetera lay quietly
in the deep mud et

cetera
(dreaming,
et
cetera, of
Your smile
eyes knees and of your Etcetera)
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post #70 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter

Clitoris is of Greek origin.

"Pussy" is, I believe, some kind of modification of a Greek word for "purse."

I had a teacher in high school who claimed "quaint", while having the same meaning it does for us, was also an early variant of the "c" word.

I've never been sure whether to believe this or whether it was one of those risqué things some teachers seemed to delight in coming out with at an all-girls Catholic school.

Anyway, she reckoned that Andrew Marvel may have intended the use of the word as a double entendre in these lines from "To His Coy Mistress":

"And your quaint honour turn to dust,
And into ashes all my lust.
The grave's a fine and private place,
But none I think do there embrace."

Ever heard that one before in your biz, midwinter?
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #71 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

I had a teacher in high school who claimed "quaint", while having the same meaning it does for us, was also an early variant of the "c" word.

I've never been sure whether to believe this or whether it was one of those risqué things some teachers seemed to delight in coming out with at an all-girls Catholic school.

Anyway, she reckoned that Andrew Marvel may have intended the use of the word as a double entendre in these lines from "To His Coy Mistress":

"And your quaint honour turn to dust,
And into ashes all my lust.
The grave's a fine and private place,
But none I think do there embrace."

Ever heard that one before in your biz, midwinter?

NOt that I'm an expert on the history of dirty words, but "cunt" is actually a really, really old term referring to rabbits. "Coneys." The reasons are obvious, I should expect.

Well lord almighty. I was all prepped to say that your English teacher was a moron, and lo and behold, here's the OED entry for "quaint" as a noun:

Quote:
Originally Posted by probably some lunatic sending in made up citations

The female external genitals. Cf. CUNT n.

c1330 (?a1300) Sir Tristrem (1886) l. 2254 Hir queynt abouen hir kne, Naked {th}e kni{ygh}tes knewe. c1390 CHAUCER Miller's Tale 3276 This hende Nicholas Fil with this yonge wyf to rage and pleye..and pryuely he caughte hire by the queynte. c1415 CHAUCER Wife of Bath's Tale (Corpus Oxf.) 608 And trewely, as myn housbond tolde me, I hadde {th}e beste queynte [Heng quonyam] {th}at mighte be. c1576 T. WHYTHORNE Autobiogr. (1961) 128 A queint, A queint, hee kried bianby. 1598 J. FLORIO Worlde of Wordes, A womans quaint or priuities. 1659 G. TORRIANO Florio's Vocab. Ital. e Inglese, Dóndola, any thing, toy, fancy, or conceit to passe away the time withall, any dalliance, dandling, or wantonizing.., by Met. a womans quaint.

Was apparently rare after the late c16.
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post #72 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post

Clitoris is of Greek origin.

"Pussy" is, I believe, some kind of modification of a Greek word for "purse."

On this subject, I never understood the "lay, laying, lain, laid, lie, lying, lied" distinction.
post #73 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter

NOt that I'm an expert on the history of dirty words, but "cunt" is actually a really, really old term referring to rabbits. "Coneys." The reasons are obvious, I should expect.

Umm..........actually, not really.


Well, I'll be. Miss What's-her-name might really have been onto something.
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter

Well lord almighty. I was all prepped to say that your English teacher was a moron, and lo and behold, here's the OED entry for "quaint" as a noun:

Quote:
Originally Posted by probably some lunatic sending in made up citations
The female external genitals. Cf. CUNT n.

c1330 (?a1300) Sir Tristrem (1886) l. 2254 Hir queynt abouen hir kne, Naked {th}e kni{ygh}tes knewe. c1390 CHAUCER Miller's Tale 3276 This hende Nicholas Fil with this yonge wyf to rage and pleye..and pryuely he caughte hire by the queynte. c1415 CHAUCER Wife of Bath's Tale (Corpus Oxf.) 608 And trewely, as myn housbond tolde me, I hadde {th}e beste queynte [Heng quonyam] {th}at mighte be. c1576 T. WHYTHORNE Autobiogr. (1961) 128 A queint, A queint, hee kried bianby. 1598 J. FLORIO Worlde of Wordes, A womans quaint or priuities. 1659 G. TORRIANO Florio's Vocab. Ital. e Inglese, Dóndola, any thing, toy, fancy, or conceit to passe away the time withall, any dalliance, dandling, or wantonizing.., by Met. a womans quaint.

I especially like this example:

"c1415 CHAUCER Wife of Bath's Tale (Corpus Oxf.) 608 And trewely, as myn housbond tolde me, I hadde {th}e beste queynte [Heng quonyam] {th}at mighte be."

I bet he did. Sounds like he wanted a fuck if you ask me. Gives a whole new perspective to the term "bragging rights".
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And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #74 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

Umm..........actually, not really.

Um. Rabbits reproduce because they, um, fuck like bunnies.

Quote:
I especially like this example:

"c1415 CHAUCER Wife of Bath's Tale (Corpus Oxf.) 608 And trewely, as myn housbond tolde me, I hadde {th}e beste queynte [Heng quonyam] {th}at mighte be."

I bet he did. Sounds like he wanted a fuck if you ask me. Gives a whole new perspective to the term "bragging rights".


I'm going to take some time tomorrow and look at Hamlet—specifically the exchange between Gertrude and Hamlet—to see if there's any "quaints" in there. Har!

God I love stuff like this. When I was finishing my undergraduate work, one of my professors tried to push me into the History of English/Linguistics because I seemed to have a knack for it. I went into another sub-field. Sometimes I wonder whether I made the right decision...this is fun!
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post #75 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter

Um. Rabbits reproduce because they, um, fuck like bunnies.

Telling me "coney" was another word for rabbit probably would have been more helpful. We call them rabbits, bunnies and various names not fit for a family-friendly forum but "coney" is not one I've come across before.

Quote:
I'm going to take some time tomorrow and look at Hamlet—specifically the exchange between Gertrude and Hamlet—to see if there's any "quaints" in there. Har!

God I love stuff like this. When I was finishing my undergraduate work, one of my professors tried to push me into the History of English/Linguistics because I seemed to have a knack for it. I went into another sub-field. Sometimes I wonder whether I made the right decision...this is fun!

Are you familiar with Mr Quislibet? I've probably posted it here before. Still one of the funniest things I've read on the internet. I, too, would marry this man sight unseen like many of the commenters. It stands to reason he would be supremely entertaining and good in bed. And looks aren't that important after all.

The original (Sir Mix-a-lot "Baby's Got Back"):

Quote:
I like big butts and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull out your tough
'Cause you notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring

After Mr Quislibet has done his thing:

Quote:
magnae clunes mihi placent, nec possum de hac re mentiri.
(Large buttocks are pleasing to me, nor am I able to lie concerning this matter.)
quis enim, consortes mei, non fateatur,
(For who, colleagues, would not admit,)
cum puella incedit minore medio corpore
(Whenever a girl comes by with a rather small middle part of the body)
sub quo manifestus globus, inflammare animos
(Beneath which is an obvious spherical mass, that it inflames the spirits)
virtute praestare ut velitis, notantes bracas eius
(So that you want to be conspicuous for manly virtue, noticing her breeches)
clunibus profunde fartas(*1) esse
(Have been deeply stuffed with buttock?)
a! captus sum, nec desinere intueri possum.
(Alas! I am captured, nor am I able to desist from gazing.)

Keep us updated on how many "quaints" you find in Hamlet.
Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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Tomorrow shall be love for the loveless;
And for the lover, tomorrow shall be love.
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post #76 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post

...some lunatic sending in made up citations...

Well we do know our famed Dr. Minor was an institutionalized loon after all. Just one of his little jokes, no doubt.

(Finally something I could contribute to this thread to make me seem, in pretense, half as intelligent as the rest of you!)
post #77 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

Telling me "coney" was another word for rabbit probably would have been more helpful. We call them rabbits, bunnies and various names not fit for a family-friendly forum but "coney" is not one I've come across before.

And of course we're discussing the origins of the word "cunt" in a family-friendly forum.
post #78 of 149
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by crazychester View Post

Telling me "coney" was another word for rabbit probably would have been more helpful. We call them rabbits, bunnies and various names not fit for a family-friendly forum but "coney" is not one I've come across before.



"There's only one way to cook a brace of coneys!"
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post #79 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by other people on this forum View Post

I wonder what the derivation of the word 'cunt' is? )

I understood it's older than 'coney', having a really ancient Indo-European root. Like 'queen', to which it's related. If I remember, a a 'cunt' is a sacred well in Sanskrit, but it's also got lots of things to do femininity.

In the Mahabharata, Kunti was the mother of the Pandavas, the good guys, one of whom was Arjuna, the co-star of the Bhagavad Gita. I think the Celtic version of Kali was also known as Cunti.

I love this stuff too. I just can't ever remember it.
post #80 of 149
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwinter View Post

That'll be $5 or an answer to this question:

Assuming that there is such a thing as the Oedipal phase, would a child in a same-sex family (say, two men) go through it? I've asked three psychologists and gotten three different answers.

I can't get past that assumption, so where should I send the $5?

Alternatively, I could just make up some shit, just like Freud did!
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