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Microsoft to spoof Hodgman in new "I'm a PC" television ads

post #1 of 80
Thread Starter 
Microsoft on Thursday will segue into the next phase of a $300 million advertising campaign with an "audacious embrace" of the derisive "I’m a PC" label slapped upon its image by rival Apple, according to the New York Times.

The newspaper, which appears to have been briefed on the matter, says the new string of ads will mark a stark departure from the offbeat teaser skits (1, 2) featuring Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld that dominated the initial phase of the campaign, and which were met with mixed reviews.

"One new Microsoft commercial even begins with a company engineer who resembles John Hodgman, the comedian portraying the loser PC character in the Apple campaign," according to the Times. "'Hello, I’m a PC,' the engineer says, echoing Mr. Hodgman’s recurring line, 'and I’ve been made into a stereotype.'"

The risky decision to use Apple's assault as a foundation for a counter-strike is reportedly a trademark of the firm behind the Microsoft campaign, Crispin Porter & Bogusky, and reminiscent of tactics eventually used in other high profile corporate bouts such as Hertz vs. Avis and Pepsi vs. Coca-Cola.

Microsofts hopes to regain control of its image, as well as that of the "PC," in the new ads, which will feature cameo appearances by Gates and other celebrities such as Eva Longoria, but not Seinfeld. The stars of the ads will be "everyday PC users" who pride themselves on the use of Microsoft PCs, the Times says, in addition to some 60 Microsoft employees who'll be identified *"by e-mail addresses." *That includes Bill Gates.

Television commercials will begin airing Thursday evening on shows like “Grey’s Anatomy,” and will be complemented by newspaper ads and new media on Microsoft's Windows.com website.

Also beginning Thursday night, the Redmond, Wash.-based software giant will invite visitors to the website to upload videos and photos that will demonstrate "how they, too, are PCs." Microsoft will reportedly select some of the photos to appear on electronic billboards in Times Square beginning the following day, while others will be used in advertisement banners.

A future series of magazine and outdoor ads are also said to emphasizes Windows' ability to scale from mobile devices and TV sets to notebooks and traditional PCs.

Meanwhile, Microsoft remains coy on whether it plans to reintroduce Seinfeld in a future phase of the campaign.
post #2 of 80
>> Microsoft's hopes to regain control of its image, as well as that of the "PC," in the new ads, which will feature cameo appearances by Gates and other celebrities such as Eva Longoria, but not Seinfeld. <<

No, no, no. In this sentence, it's not "Microsoft's," but "Microsoft." Otherwise it is a sentence looking for a verb.
post #3 of 80
It'd be an incredible waste if they don't bring Seinfeld back. $10 million for two short spots? He didn't make that kind of money even on his own show.
post #4 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kolchak View Post

It'd be an incredible waste if they don't bring Seinfeld back. $10 million for two short spots? He didn't make that kind of money even on his own show.

It's not like Bill couldn't afford to throw that money around. Even in today's economy. What's 10mill here or there?
post #5 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by AppleInsider View Post

"One new Microsoft commercial even begins with a company engineer who resembles John Hodgman, the comedian portraying the loser PC character in the Apple campaign," according to the Times. "'Hello, Im a PC,' the engineer says, echoing Mr. Hodgmans recurring line, 'and Ive been made into a stereotype.'"

Hoo boy, it's about to get interesting. I'm eager not so much to see the MS ad(s) but to see if/how Apple will respond. I suspect they're in meetings right now, brainstorming possible responses and are calling Hodgman to see how soon he's available.
post #6 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by ktappe View Post

Hoo boy, it's about to get interesting. I'm eager not so much to see the MS ad(s) but to see if/how Apple will respond. I suspect they're in meetings right now, brainstorming possible responses and are calling Hodgman to see how soon he's available.

I doubt Apple would respond or brainstorm. Advertising wise, they have M$ by the balls. No response necessary, just tighter grip.
OMG here we go again...
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OMG here we go again...
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post #7 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by ktappe View Post

Hoo boy, it's about to get interesting. I'm eager not so much to see the MS ad(s) but to see if/how Apple will respond. I suspect they're in meetings right now, brainstorming possible responses and are calling Hodgman to see how soon he's available.

Apple should just incorporate it in their ads by having Hodgman run on the set and out of breath and the Mac guy asks where PC has been and PC can say "moonlighting for MS as a PC. (a brief pause) Literally!" (I think that succinctly says it all)

Ten years ago, we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash.  Today we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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Ten years ago, we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope and Johnny Cash.  Today we have no Jobs, no Hope and no Cash.

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post #8 of 80
A life without walls... and no Windows!
post #9 of 80
Quote:
The stars of the ads will be "everyday PC users" who pride themselves on the use of Microsoft PCs, the Times says, in addition to some 60 Microsoft employees who'll be identified "by e-mail addresses." That includes Bill Gates.

One word - sad.
post #10 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rot'nApple View Post

Apple should just incorporate it in their ads by having Hodgman run on the set and out of breath and the Mac guy asks where PC has been and PC can say "moonlighting for MS as a PC. (a brief pause) Literally!" (I think that succinctly says it all)

Now, that is brilliant!
post #11 of 80
In the apple ads, isn't Pc supposed to represent the operating system and not the user?

I really hate big companies that try to be "indie" or define their customers as individuals. how about they advertise the actal product.


***
post #12 of 80
I thought the Seinfeld Gates thing was looking up in Part II. Just seeing them talking in the bedroom was funny. That's the end of all that? Damn, they left me wanting more.

The thing with the celebs sounds so MS. It won't work, it'll come across as "This isn't your father's Oldsmobile." Microsoft can't buy cool no matter how hard they try.

But Part II - that was going somewhere...
post #13 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by AppleInsider View Post

"'Hello, I’m a PC,' the engineer says, echoing Mr. Hodgman’s recurring line, 'and I’ve been made into a stereotype.'"

Stereotype: a simplified and standardized conception or image invested with special meaning and held in common by members of a group

Truth: the true or actual state of a matter; conformity with fact or reality; a verified or indisputable fact, proposition, principle, or the like

Seems like they can't even tell the "truth" in their ads...PC isn't a stereotype...it's the truth!


Quote:
Originally Posted by AppleInsider View Post

"A future series of magazine and outdoor ads are also said to emphasizes Windows' ability to scale from mobile devices and TV sets to notebooks and traditional PCs."

iPhone...Front Row (or Apple TV)...MacBook...iMac...looks like OS X can run the gauntlet too!

Micro$oft...For those who can't innovate, you just imitate...and lie, deceive, and cry foul.
post #14 of 80
Apple should come up with some kind of ad pointing out that Macs can run Microsoft Windows too. Maybe something like this:

http://mammals.org/movies/us/apple/g...nt_480x272.mov

Then everything Microsoft says that makes Windows great is just one more reason to get a Mac, and enjoy all the Microsoft goodness alongside your OS X

Phrase it as being able to "choose" between OS X and Windows on one machine, and any Microsoft ads about walls begin to look especially silly.
post #15 of 80
microsoft marketing brainstorming session:

nobody understands our ads!
so dump the concept and just copy apple's marketing strategy, but call it "phase2".
whatever we do, don't showcase our products or their features in our ads, that's foolish.
let's give ballmer another line of blow and let him run around on stage, that seemed to work.
let's slap more code on top of vista, call it windows 7, and get away from the word "vista" quick!

windows. life without walls. now THAT makes perfect sense, but how do we show life without walls:
how about being stuck in a cage surrounded by sharks. perfect!

windows. life without walls, but you might feel like you're stuck in a cage.
post #16 of 80
No functioning company would allow it's brand to be sullied like this, and no functioning company would sit on it's hands while AAPL's market share doubles in the process. MSFT has got serious systemic problems that are only going to get worse.

Granted, they'll live off their fat for years, but Elvis has left the building.

In our desire to impose form on the world we have lost the capacity to see the form that is there;
and in that lies not liberation but alienation, the cutting off from things as they really are. --...

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In our desire to impose form on the world we have lost the capacity to see the form that is there;
and in that lies not liberation but alienation, the cutting off from things as they really are. --...

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post #17 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by desarc View Post

dump the concept and just copy apple's marketing strategy, but call it "phase2".
let's slap more code on top of vista, call it windows 7, and get away from the word "vista" quick!

I suspect you've hit the nail on the head with both of these.
post #18 of 80
Bogusky
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post #19 of 80
You know how when you buy a new car that turns out to be a piece of junk, it is described as a "Lemon" ?

Why not have Mac walk in on PC who is in the process of drawing his new "Lemon" logo. Only, as he walks up, the laptop he is using has a yellow lemon lit up on the back of his large bulky PC. He can say "Well, we copied everything else and it seemed to work. Now introducing PC Lemon!" -

You get the idea...

Thought this would be a funny ad.

Xodusboy
post #20 of 80
Jeez Microsoft - isn't it enough that you copy all Apple's user interface ideas? Now you have to copy their ad campaign too?
post #21 of 80
i think its funny that apple, possibly the most conceited company on earth, fessed up that mobileme isn't up to par pretty quickly. Microsoft, instead of admitting vista sucks, tries to say it flat out doesn't. Sounds amazingly foolish.

Also, I think we can prettymuch all agree that vista is the laughingstock of the tech world, and windows mobile is a pile of trash.

Microsoft's new push should be for windows 7, which should be unix based, superfast, have completely modularized components (you can remove/add anything you like), and allow people to share components over social networks.

but it won't. Can't wait till apple does that though
post #22 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by Quine View Post

i think its funny that apple, possibly the most conceited company on earth, fessed up that mobileme isn't up to par pretty quickly. Microsoft, instead of admitting vista sucks, tries to say it flat out doesn't. Sounds amazingly foolish.

I'm sure any MobileMe user will beg to differ. Sure Micro$oft took a longer time to admit failure, but Apple's time to respond was still unacceptably long...especially the second outage for the "1% of users" who could not access their email for over a week!!!!!!!!!
post #23 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by dmz View Post

No functioning company would allow it's brand to be sullied like this, and no functioning company would sit on it's hands while AAPL's market share doubles in the process. MSFT has got serious systemic problems that are only going to get worse.

Granted, they'll live off their fat for years, but Elvis has left the building.


As long as they are allowed to operate with a monopoly, they will outlast Apple.
post #24 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by Quine View Post

i think its funny that apple, possibly the most conceited company on earth, fessed up that mobileme isn't up to par pretty quickly. Microsoft, instead of admitting vista sucks, tries to say it flat out doesn't. Sounds amazingly foolish.

Also, I think we can prettymuch all agree that vista is the laughingstock of the tech world, and windows mobile is a pile of trash.

Microsoft's new push should be for windows 7, which should be unix based, superfast, have completely modularized components (you can remove/add anything you like), and allow people to share components over social networks.

but it won't. Can't wait till apple does that though

Vista is a very good OS and better in some respects to OSX. When I tried it in mid-2007 it wasn't the OS itself that was giving me problems but the drivers. Many drivers completely crashed the system. I believe that if I gave it another try today I'd love it.

The same was said about OSX 10.0 when it first came out. It was slow (spinning beach ball), lacked true compatibility with classic apps, and crashed often. Many years later we have an awesome OS (starting with 10.2) that we take for granted.

Vista was a major overhaul and showed in its immaturity when it was released. I believe it deserves some respect. It is Boot Camp worthy.
post #25 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by MacTel View Post

Vista is a very good OS and better in some respects to OSX.

I don't want to start a flame war, but I spend about half my time in Windows (at work) and the other half in OS X (at home), and there are a *few* things I like better in Windows:

- Load/save dialogs are better than OS X
- Font rendering is cleaner/clearer
- Windows Explorer is a better file manager than Finder
- Table controls, tree controls, and sliders look better
- Disc burning is more intuitive

But overall I prefer OS X. You can't expect something to be better in every single aspect because some things are tradeoffs.
post #26 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by dmz View Post

No functioning company would allow it's brand to be sullied like this, and no functioning company would sit on it's hands while AAPL's market share doubles in the process. MSFT has got serious systemic problems that are only going to get worse.

Granted, they'll live off their fat for years, but Elvis has left the building.

No. Even if Windows were to die, and that's a pretty big if, Microsoft is everywhere else and would continue to grow. Were Windows to get into any serious trouble, Microsoft would eventually do a rewrite. Windows X?
post #27 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by MacTel View Post

Vista is a very good OS and better in some respects to OSX. When I tried it in mid-2007 it wasn't the OS itself that was giving me problems but the drivers. Many drivers completely crashed the system. I believe that if I gave it another try today I'd love it.

The same was said about OSX 10.0 when it first came out. It was slow (spinning beach ball), lacked true compatibility with classic apps, and crashed often. Many years later we have an awesome OS (starting with 10.2) that we take for granted.

Vista was a major overhaul and showed in its immaturity when it was released. I believe it deserves some respect. It is Boot Camp worthy.

With respect, you simply don't get it. Vista isn't an overhaul worthy of comparison to OS X. OS X was a complete rewrite, ground up stuff. Sure, a bit of NeXT here and there, but no OS 9. Yes, 10.0, 10.1 and hell I disagree, I think 10.2 too were incomplete. But that is irrelevant.

Baring perhaps being able to use Microsoft's DirectX and baring aesthetics, no part of any current version of Windows is measurably "better" than OS X. I challenge you to provide concrete examples that are specific to Vista that aren't already available in XP.

Vista remains a significant liability and a great deal of why is found in (a) the legacy code within Vista and (b) drivers that don't play nice with one another. Microsoft is working to address the latter concern, which is great but they also need to do what Apple did and now is a good time.

Ground up. It's time for a new Windows. And ya know what, I like to consider myself a Mac fanatic, but it is quality that grabs me the most. Microsoft could even win me over were they ever to do this, right.
post #28 of 80
Quote:
Apple should just incorporate it in their ads by having Hodgman run on the set and out of breath and the Mac guy asks where PC has been and PC can say "moonlighting for MS as a PC. (a brief pause) Literally!" (I think that succinctly says it all)

That's brilliant X2.

Even though I laughed at MS Seinfeld ad because it is irrelevant, I starting to see their message (I think), Oh well, just another attempt on Msoft screwing things up. Lets see how MS does the new ad this time. Im taking my popcorn! who want???

Oh yea, and its interesting to see people who is going to post a video of a PC and saying Im better then Mac (the only users that I can think of is gamers and computer modders)

Vista is not a complete overhaul, there is even techniques how to make your current Windows XP to look exactly like Windows Vista without having to install StarDock (or something like that)
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post #29 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by nagromme View Post

Apple should come up with some kind of ad pointing out that Macs can run Microsoft Windows too. Maybe something like this:

http://mammals.org/movies/us/apple/g...nt_480x272.mov

Then everything Microsoft says that makes Windows great is just one more reason to get a Mac, and enjoy all the Microsoft goodness alongside your OS X

Phrase it as being able to "choose" between OS X and Windows on one machine, and any Microsoft ads about walls begin to look especially silly.

They already have such an ad: the "Touché" ad from the Get a Mac campaign, from 2006.

It's on the Apple website.

http://www.apple.com/getamac/ads/

When you look at all of the ads together, it's easy to see how brilliant they really are. No wonder that MS's feelings are hurt...
post #30 of 80
This thread is fun, but ppl are kinda missing the big picture...

The way these things work is usually a progression along these lines:

Step 1: IGNORE
Step 2: RIDICULE
Step 3: ATTACK
Step 4: COPY
Step 5: STEAL

When Apple first started to gain marketshare against Microsoft in the desktop PC market, MS's first response was to utterly ignore it. Which is part of the reason they're having to dig themselves out of a hole, image-wise. And why Apple has been able to define MS's 'PC' image so effectively in the form of Mr. Hodgman.

Then, when Apple started to do better and better, MS ridiculed it. Remember Ballmer's mocking comments about Apple being "the little guy" with 2% of the market? They weren't an accident. The party line was, "Don't take Apple seriously."

That didn't work either. So, now we're in the 'attack' phase. MS will ostensibly be attacking Apple's defining of MS's image. However, that of course will draw all the more attention to it. MS may also decide to attack the Mac or Apple directly, which legitimizes Apple and the Mac as viable alternatives.

If these attempts fail, the next step will be to COPY. Yes, funny I know, considering that that is all MS does, particularly to Apple. But, this will be a much more PUBLIC copying of Apple then what has come before. MS will suddenly become the "user experience company". They will talk, in a slightly different way of course, about "humanizing" computer technology, and making PCs "for the rest of us", in effect. You get the idea.

And, assuming MS is successful in this 'mother of all copycats' effort, they will then have STOLEN Apple's image, MS will have 'ALWAYS' been the user-experience company, according to their zillions of ads, thus completing the eternal five-step progression--> Ignore. Ridicule. Attack. Copy. Steal.

I do not necessarily think they will succeed, but this is how these things usually progress, and this is what MS will TRY to do. It's up to Apple to counter it effectively, and I don't think ppl quite grok that it may not be the 'Harlem Globetrotters vs New Jersey Generals' contest it has been up to this point. Ineffectual Jerry Seinfeld ads or no.

...
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post #31 of 80
Quote:
Step 1: IGNORE
Step 2: RIDICULE
Step 3: ATTACK
Step 4: COPY
Step 5: STEAL

Wow, interesting and you get this from your observation or from a source?
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post #32 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kolchak View Post

It'd be an incredible waste if they don't bring Seinfeld back. $10 million for two short spots? He didn't make that kind of money even on his own show.

He GOT WAY to much (Much more then 10 million when the show sold). The show was not worth 10 million when it sold, let alone nearly 1 BILLION???

Getting rid of him, is a good thing, but it's not going to matter who they get
post #33 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by AHeneen View Post

I'm sure any MobileMe user will beg to differ. Sure Micro$oft took a longer time to admit failure, but Apple's time to respond was still unacceptably long...especially the second outage for the "1% of users" who could not access their email for over a week!!!!!!!!!

And now Apple is issues with many printers not working with 10.5

error -9632

But there is a cure
post #34 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by MacTel View Post

Vista is a very good OS and better in some respects to OSX. When I tried it in mid-2007 it wasn't the OS itself that was giving me problems but the drivers......

Vista was a major overhaul and showed in its immaturity when it was released. I believe it deserves some respect. It is Boot Camp worthy.

You are way off base.
You are also spouting the pure MicroSoft line.

"There is nothing wrong with Vista, it's just a perception problem"

If THAT were true, they could've fixed their "issues" long long ago with a simple bunch of ads.
They can "call" it perception issues, but if that's all it was, all the companies (Dell, Gateway, eMachine, HP....etc) would've fought back because THEY are the ones getting their head handed to them and NOT MicroSoft. Sure MicroSoft loses some market share but the battle is REALLY for the life and health of the HARDWARE makers.

So far, MicroSoft successfully uses the hardware makers as an extension of their organization. So when the product sickens their efforts, it's a problem back at MicroSoft. They fought like crazy to kill XP, and did NOT want to have Dell have an "Upgrade" on their website that essentially was "Pay us 50 bucks extra and we'll take vista off and put xp back on your new PC". The failure is at the hardware companies, MicroSoft is trying to protect their relationship with THOSE companies. This is not so much Apple vs. MicroSoft as it is MicroSoft losing control of the hardware mono-architecture. Other unix based solution, open source products, the world is going to crack. As it does, the old "Does it run Windows, because I know if it runs windows all my software will work...." model is dead.

The old model is NOT dead because OS X is killing Vista. (I do think that is happening....)
The old model is dead because most people run stuff off the internet rather than as a desktop application.

A final note for all you people that want to screen by screen compare Vista to OS X.
It doesn't matter.
Nobody is going to get rid of their three thousand dollar Dell two years early and "Get a Mac" because the finder is pretty or not, or because spotlight is a must have. But the tenth time in one year you have to reinstall Windows because your trojans, viruses, and popup ads have taken over....... well THAT'S what is wrong with Vista. It's trash.
It can be the best OS in the world in a remote setting, but people are online.

One of the funniest "Get a Mac" ads was the security one, "Allow or ..." with the secret service standing behind him. OMG. Talk about a lame solution in Vista. Their marketing approach is to allow "innovation" by making ways in the OS for pieces of code from partner developers to attach and act as a part of the OS. An absolutely brillant way to allow virus activity. For MS to spend SO MUCH TIME, to bring a new OS to market and to have the security model be "Ask the user if they really want stuff to happen" is something I still laugh at every time I think about it.

The next version of Windows, had better be really designed and not thrown together.
And if it doesn't fix the fundamental problem of how they are leaking like a submarine with a screen door..... that one will be less adopted than Vista.

The number of companies that have so far taken a pass on Vista, will turn into a list of companies that have taken a permanant pass on it as they decide to skip it for the Vista replacement. (after it comes out, after SP1 and SP2 come out, and after they evaluate it)

This means sometime in 2010, Vista's replacement will be making headway.
MicroSoft is going to need more than an Ad campaign to help their hardware partners if they expect those companies to hold the "MicroSoft Only" OS choice.

The richest companies in the Microsoft world, are the virus/trojan protection companies.
Until THAT changes, don't focus so much on how clean the fonts are.....
post #35 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by ascii View Post

Jeez Microsoft - isn't it enough that you copy all Apple's user interface ideas? Now you have to copy their ad campaign too?

How else can they ever come up (or have ever come up) with anything even half way decent other than ripping off Apple? Mind you, the psychology of this is a bit dubious. They are working on the principle that everyone knows the Mac ad to understand theirs if they spook Mr PC. So in effect endorsing the Mac ad ...
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post #36 of 80
I can't wait to see "real PC users" sending in their videos of them using PCs.

Cheeto fingers and Star Wars t-shirts anyone?
post #37 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by adammull View Post

I can't wait to see "real PC users" sending in their videos of them using PCs.

Cheeto fingers and Star Wars t-shirts anyone?

This fits in very well with what I was going to post.

I personally think the best ad campaign Microsoft could use would be to feed off the stereotype of Mac users/aficionados being arrogant and self-righteous. Make PC users appear down-to-earth whereas Mac users appear as fashion victims. I think that would connect with people more than these trying-too-hard-to-reinvent-their-image style ads.

It would have to be done in a somewhat subtle (not hokey) way though. Which isn't really Microsoft's style.
 
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post #38 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kolchak View Post

It'd be an incredible waste if they don't bring Seinfeld back. $10 million for two short spots? He didn't make that kind of money even on his own show.

Despite how they Microsoft is spinning this as merely being the first phase of an ad campaign that is now "over," anyone can see that actually these ads were actually "cancelled."

There are rumours of at least two more episodes "in the can" that will never see the light of day, so that's four commercials for 10 million and that's fairly standard rates.

I just hope we don't have to wait until we are in the retirement home for the ones that were never aired to leak out. I think they are lousy advertisements but I'd still love to see them.
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post #39 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by auxio View Post

This fits in very well with what I was going to post.

I personally think the best ad campaign Microsoft could use would be to feed off the stereotype of Mac users/aficionados being arrogant and self-righteous. Make PC users appear down-to-earth whereas Mac users appear as fashion victims. I think that would connect with people more than these trying-too-hard-to-reinvent-their-image style ads.

It would have to be done in a somewhat subtle (not hokey) way though. Which isn't really Microsoft's style.


Agreed. What's funny is how awful and predictable Microsoft is at advertising. They really just don't get it do they? It's almost unbelievable how bad they are at interaction.

I could come up with tons of ads making fun of Macs. We are easy. We are pricks who have a hatred for anything un-Mac. I would play up the fact that there are still websites I cannot use with Safari. There are tons of games that will never come out for Mac. These are minor issues, but still. A Mac has some, and I say that lightly, deficiencies.
post #40 of 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by adammull View Post

I could come up with tons of ads making fun of Macs. We are easy. We are pricks who have a hatred for anything un-Mac.

Even beyond that. Have the Mac user pull up in an Audi/BMW (with built-in iPod integration), being very smug about the latest music to come out of <pick your fashion capitol>, talking about "haute" architecture/design, being dismissive of any opinions the PC user has. Make the Mac user seem obsessive in their following of high-end culture, and really play up that feeling one gets when they encounter someone like that. Make the PC user intelligent, but have a much more approachable and common-sense outlook on things.

Hey Microsoft, want to pay me 10 million to write your next ad campaign?
 
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