UN Seeks Control of Internet
Since the UN is going to discuss taking over the internet on Wednesday, I'd like all members to add to the possible scenarios I've come up with below.
Rueters Link
Ars Technica Link
What would a new Internet run by the United Nations look like? Some possible scenarios:
1. China is granted internet root access control. China immediately blocks access to all sites which have ever criticized China's human rights record. These sites comprise approximately 68% of all internet sites.
UN hails China for solving internet congestion problem with bold, new solution.
2. Cuba is officially given responsibility for maintaining the internet backbone structure.
UN says if Cuba can maintain fleets of 1950s automobiles, it's a natural for internet maintenance.
3. Russia granted control of RSS protocol.
UN says it's only one letter different than their old name.
4. Angelina Jolie appointed as ambassador for Children's Access to Internet program.
UN turns down Michael Jackson's application for same appointment.
5. UK submits new Back-End Protocol proposal. Prince Charles reportedly interested.
UN appoints subcommittee chaired by Paris Hilton and composed of Greek and Arab experts to study the proposal.
6. UN takes up issue of internet spam.
UN assigns black helicopter fleet to enforce internet spam ban.
7. Microsoft offers to run internet for UN and pay off all UN debts at the same time.
UN seriously studying Microsoft's 99 cent per internet access plan which requires only Windows-enabled browsers. Says current WWW standard needs "improvements".
Rueters Link
Ars Technica Link
What would a new Internet run by the United Nations look like? Some possible scenarios:
1. China is granted internet root access control. China immediately blocks access to all sites which have ever criticized China's human rights record. These sites comprise approximately 68% of all internet sites.
UN hails China for solving internet congestion problem with bold, new solution.
2. Cuba is officially given responsibility for maintaining the internet backbone structure.
UN says if Cuba can maintain fleets of 1950s automobiles, it's a natural for internet maintenance.
3. Russia granted control of RSS protocol.
UN says it's only one letter different than their old name.
4. Angelina Jolie appointed as ambassador for Children's Access to Internet program.
UN turns down Michael Jackson's application for same appointment.
5. UK submits new Back-End Protocol proposal. Prince Charles reportedly interested.
UN appoints subcommittee chaired by Paris Hilton and composed of Greek and Arab experts to study the proposal.
6. UN takes up issue of internet spam.
UN assigns black helicopter fleet to enforce internet spam ban.
7. Microsoft offers to run internet for UN and pay off all UN debts at the same time.
UN seriously studying Microsoft's 99 cent per internet access plan which requires only Windows-enabled browsers. Says current WWW standard needs "improvements".
Comments
Even if ICANN should be renamed "ICAN'T I'm Only Advisory", it still does a better job than the UN could ever do.
Originally posted by mcsjgs
The goofiest thing is that the is a serious proposal by the UN.
Even if ICANN should be renamed "ICAN'T I'm Only Advisory", it still does a better job than the UN could ever do.
Which is only true if you live in the US. If you happen to live in a country that has seen its cc-domain entries revoked by the US (Somalia for instance), you get a different perspective.
OK, maybe that?s not the best example.
I was going to add a tasteless joke about Somalia's internet access being two cans and a string, while broadband was a rope and two buckets, but that would be racist and culturally insensitive, so I won't.
Originally posted by mcsjgs
4. Angelina Jolie appointed as ambassador for Children's Access to Internet program.
UN turns down Michael Jackson's application for same appointment.
5. UK submits new Back-End Protocol proposal. Prince Charles reportedly interested.
UN appoints subcommittee chaired by Paris Hilton and composed of Greek and Arab experts to study the proposal.
Ah, easy targets
Maybe he can do a better job than Kofi Annan... Cos he has more financial clout. Simply bribe all the poorer nations to suit his policies.