Why the double standards?
Why are there such double standards for men and women? Ive debated and presented my points with many women and have always been looked at as sexist. One double standard that I think that needs to be addressed is that of domestic abuse.
A woman who hits a man is looked at as being empowered but a man who hits a woman is looked at as a wife-beater (even if he has no wife) even if its in retaliation for the woman assult. Dont take it the wrong way. Im in no way condoning domestic abuse but I think there are both sides to every story. Ive been slapped quite a few times by girls and its always been because of something I said. And in retaliation I hit them back. I was punished severly and told repeatedly that hitting girls was wrong however the girls was comforted and even praised by other girls (and some guys) about standing up to the "big,bad boy". I know that this might sound trivial coming from a 17 year old but a point needs to be made. I shouldnt have to stand down,then or now, if some one hits me whether it be male or female if I havent touched them, regardless if ive offended u or not. There are many others I could point out but I think I start with this one first
A woman who hits a man is looked at as being empowered but a man who hits a woman is looked at as a wife-beater (even if he has no wife) even if its in retaliation for the woman assult. Dont take it the wrong way. Im in no way condoning domestic abuse but I think there are both sides to every story. Ive been slapped quite a few times by girls and its always been because of something I said. And in retaliation I hit them back. I was punished severly and told repeatedly that hitting girls was wrong however the girls was comforted and even praised by other girls (and some guys) about standing up to the "big,bad boy". I know that this might sound trivial coming from a 17 year old but a point needs to be made. I shouldnt have to stand down,then or now, if some one hits me whether it be male or female if I havent touched them, regardless if ive offended u or not. There are many others I could point out but I think I start with this one first
Comments
These are obviously things that society has not yet felt it time to redress, and all of them are complicated topics that impact a lot of stereotypes and assumptions that underlie the fabric of our society. If you want to hear a fairly radical version of these possible grievances try looking for a "mens society" or "men's movement" groups. The parallels to the women's movement are uncanny.
Note: I recognize the points that those groups make, but am unsure that I agree with them, or feel that they are as big an issue as they are made out to be. I also don't feel that society is ready for any solutions at this point.
your issue is a delicate one. because your are allowed to hit back only if a) it prevents her from strikig you (selfdefence) and b) if you do not use excessive violence. and remember, normally, excessive violance is far less against a woman than against a man... it is also a question on how you hit each other... if she slaps your face and you knock her on her head with your fist -> different types of violence.
But yes, if she slaps your face and your only way of protecting you against a second slap is by slapping her face, then by all means, do it (but not too hard). If she has already slapped your face, then there is no point in hitting back. Instead, charge her with assult. Take her to the police and say:
if woman x hits me, and I am not supposed to hit back, then at least I will take her to court and make her pay. Just as if i were the one hitting.
Don't ever use excessive violence, and don't hit back unless absolutely necessary.
Originally posted by Protostar
A woman who hits a man is looked at as being empowered but a man who hits a woman is looked at as a wife-beater (even if he has no wife) even if its in retaliation for the woman assult.
The obvious answer, among others, is that males are generally stronger and have the ability to use their strength to dominate women.
but the fact that women more often get hurt by men than vice versa does not mean that it is in anyway less serious for a woman to hit a man.
my wife could hit me as hard as she wants and it wouldn't injure me, but I could hurt her very easily.
Is it more serious if a man to hit a woman because women have beem dominated by men?
Is it more serious if a white man to hit a black one because blacks have been in slavery?
Is it more serious if a German hits a Jew because Hitler was the dictator of Germany?
If a stronger woman hits a much weaker man, then this is as serious as if a stronger man hits a much weaker man... and so on. ok, then i agree.
Originally posted by Protostar
Ive been slapped quite a few times by girls and its always been because of something I said.
And in retaliation I hit them back.
Next time kick 'em in the nuts.
Originally posted by Not Unlike Myself
Biggest complaint I have is Selective Services. Women should have to register for the draft also. WHY no politician has picked up on this is beyond me. I'd case my vote for any candidate who corrects this. Either we do away with drafts, or make them sexually equal.
A few problems:
- We have not had a draft since Vietnam... the Selective Services board would be used if the draft were reinstated but this is unlikely despite the pre-election rumors/FUD
- Women are not allowed to perform combat roles under the current rules
- the physical requirements for women and men are very different in all branches (this is going by the officer standards)
- We have a very strong current in our societal history of men protecting women. This is undoutably partially genetic, and partially social (appears in other animals but the behavior/expression changes from society to society).
The middle two points speak to the rather big job that would have to be sorted out to put women on the selective service. Also a lot of though would have to go into the rules for any draft that included women (previous drafts put fathers much lower on the list than bachelors of the same age... where would mothers fall on this list, and how would you handle all of the pregnancy situations).But the last point is probably the greatest. Men and women are different, and we as people are wired to think so. What those differences mean, and how we react to them are worth examining.
Violence is NOT a gender issue. Lots of violence has been genedered, but that's a different proposition.
Now the argument of the original poster wants to ascribe a gendered rationale to violent behaviour. He may think that it equates to a sort of equalization, men and women are equal, so why can't I hit women? But the real question is, men and women are equal, so why should you hit either?
Hint. The answer is not because I would hit men just the same. The question is why do you feel justified hitting anyone?
2nd hint. Because they hit me is not the answer to that question.
Let's see if you're smart enough to work out the rest...
actually, this may shed some light on the subject
Some women can really put a hurtin on men.
My case and point....
it's the beatdown.wmv link. sorry that it's wmv
Originally posted by Karl Kuehn
A few problems:We have not had a draft since Vietnam... the Selective Services board would be used if the draft were reinstated but this is unlikely despite the pre-election rumors/FUD
Women are not allowed to perform combat roles under the current rules
the physical requirements for women and men are very different in all branches (this is going by the officer standards)
We have a very strong current in our societal history of men protecting women. This is undoutably partially genetic, and partially social (appears in other animals but the behavior/expression changes from society to society).
The middle two points speak to the rather big job that would have to be sorted out to put women on the selective service. Also a lot of though would have to go into the rules for any draft that included women (previous drafts put fathers much lower on the list than bachelors of the same age... where would mothers fall on this list, and how would you handle all of the pregnancy situations).
But the last point is probably the greatest. Men and women are different, and we as people are wired to think so. What those differences mean, and how we react to them are worth examining.
The fact that we have not had a draft in a long time has NOTHING to do with requiring women to be tracked as well.
Obviously current rules would need to change. It is the RULES which are the problem.
Lastly, society has nothing to do with LAW. I am LEGALLY required to register at 18. Why is the duty and imposition not put to a woman?
i think violencevise .. both have violence. but i prefer the maly type - the obvious. the female violence = mental, can be far worse in time. since when its done well (either by women or men) it can be equally harmful, or even worse.
Time to time, I encounter people so rude, I long for the times duels were still legal. (okay, I admit it's usually the rude males that make me feel like this.. feel free to sue me for discrimination) If they used light physical force on me, shoved me, insulted me or whatever, I wouldn't care much at all. But if they cheat, lie, squirm, and try to hide behind their position and formalities, I feel the appropriate response would be to hit them, hard.
The only reason they still carry on with the obnoxious behavior is that they have been lucky and haven't ever mouthed off at the wrong guy, one who feels the same as I do but disregards the law. Or they have.. and haven't learned anything from that.
It's the worst if these people are state/city/etc officials of various capacity. At least if they were in private companies you would have a real chance of getting them in trouble with their employer, and if that didn't work, you could vote with your money and avoid that particular establishment in the future.