Why it sucks to have a roommate!

in General Discussion edited January 2014
Unnecessary background information:

I am a college student in Los Angeles and I found myself needing a roommate as an extra income. I am only 21 and I bought my first new Lexus, hence I am poor now and it's my own fault. I live own an apartment that I am paying a mortgage on so a roommate is necessary - I have an extra bedroom that I do nothing with, so it is sensible to make money on it - or so I thought.

The Scenario:

<img src="graemlins/surprised.gif" border="0" alt="[Surprised]" />

I found a roommate through the newspaper at school, Loyola Marymount. I placed an add for a roommate and received 20 something calls. After a few interviews and phone conversations with the possible choices, I chose the one I have now - when he saw my house, he said, "I hope it's not just clean for my benefit." and I said, "No, I really am this clean." What a bunch of crap. He isn't tidy in the least. He constantly makes a mess in the kitchen, he makes food on the tile and anything he makes on the stovetop spills over and never gets cleaned up.

FIX: The stove is electric and digital, so I type in a pin code and it physically locks the oven door and disables the burner off too. So the stove problem is merely fixed.

<img src="graemlins/surprised.gif" border="0" alt="[Surprised]" /> The Bathroom: It looks like an ewok took a shower in there. Hair everywhere. The soapdish gets turned over and soap goes everywhere everytime he uses the shower; that's not what pisses me off, he never CLEANS it up!

He uses my towels and then folds them and puts them away as if it has never been used before, so that I can take a shower and use a dirty towel unknowingly.

<img src="graemlins/hmmm.gif" border="0" alt="[Hmmm]" /> I discuss his messes with him. But he continues to do the same thing. I hate to sound like a jerk but I can't help it -- I feel like I am being walked all over. Any reccomendations?

:o This tops it off: When he signed the lease, he thought that the money was due at the end of the month. What moron thinks the money is due at the end of the month? I shouldnt have rented to him, that's what my friends keep on saying. He is really nice and quiet as a roommate but he makes messes and ties up the phone. He told me I would be paid within two weeks of the contract signing, this is why I signed the contract and let it slip. My own fault entirely. He originally told me he would get his own phone line. Then he never did. I guess I have to really lay down the law.

I had to vent. I guess I rant too much. I just feel taken advantage of. This is obviously the first time I have had a roommate.

Anyone have any roommate horror stories?


  • Reply 1 of 11
    stroszekstroszek Posts: 801member
    Why don't you just kick the bastard out?
  • Reply 2 of 11
    pfflampfflam Posts: 5,053member
    You own an apartment in LA and you bought a Lexus . . . who the hell are you trying to fool except maybe yourself.... you are NOT poor!!!!! and probably never will be.

    Now with roomates... you need to screen them better before hand. You have to absolutely know what th eother person's cleanliness level is . . . I am a comfortable semi-slob with organized cupboards . . . I have lived with extreme clean freaks and it was difficult but luckily the clean freak I lived with had much experience with living with others and never demanded that I meet his standards.

    Also, once I lived with a group of people and we didn't screen to carefully and thoughthe person said no heavy drug use, he ended up being a speed dealer . . . nice guy but he was always awake and pretty difficult to talk with.

    Roomates are the worst... thank god those days are over.... but you need to NOT be too sensative, learn to have open ideas of property and definite lines of privacy and you need to compromise without keeping damerits for every little bad thing . . . .

    boot him out and get a roomy who is a genuine anal retentive sponge monger -they're out there... both of you will be happy in the long run . . .

    after all if he's your basic semi-slobby LA college student and you're complaining about hairs in the shower, then he probably can't believe it as much as you can't believe it.
  • Reply 3 of 11
    scott_h_phdscott_h_phd Posts: 448member
    Yea. Same thing happened to me. I had just bought my first used Honda. It was the Lexus of its time I'm telling you. I let my roommate borrow it because his girlfriend's car broke down on the highway. He must have gone 90mph and blown out the oil pump or something. So I had to have it towed back and then junked.

    But you got it way worse.
  • Reply 4 of 11
    pushermanpusherman Posts: 410member
    My first roommate in college and I had problems like that. I just hope you're joking about locking up the stove though. His name is on the lease too, and that's just petty.

    Just don't be a jerk about it, talk to him like a friend and ask him to help you make a list or something, and divy up the "chores" (as lame as that sounds, it works). I did the same kind of passive agressive stuff you did with my first roommate and it only got worse.

    With my current roommate, I'm a bit neater than he is, but I just expect that I should be willing to clean the house as much as it takes for it to be as clean as I want it. In other words, don't expect him to meet your expectations. Talk to him and figure out what he can do, or knows how to do (my current roommate, for the life of him cannot work a vacuum cleaner - so he does the dishes).

    Just take it easy and you won't make yourself miserable.

    [ 06-08-2002: Message edited by: poor taylor ]</p>
  • Reply 5 of 11
    powerdocpowerdoc Posts: 8,123member
    [quote]Originally posted by Stroszek:

    <strong>Why don't you just kick the bastard out?</strong><hr></blockquote>

    Because he has sign a contract
  • Reply 6 of 11
    finboyfinboy Posts: 383member
    [quote]Originally posted by pfflam:

    <strong>You own an apartment in LA and you bought a Lexus . . . who the hell are you trying to fool except maybe yourself.... you are NOT poor!!!!! and probably never will be.


    Yeah, since you're not poor you deserve whatever happens.

    Down with the rich!
  • Reply 7 of 11
    janejane Posts: 68member
    I had bad roomates too but for now I have the queen of bi... as an owner; she put the place for sale without telling us and now that she sold it she forbade us to move without giving her one month notice and she is not going to reimburse me my damage deposit event though there is obviously no damage to the place and that I have manage the place for over 2 1/2 years; meaning I have deposited the rent in her account, paid the bills, paid for ads in the papers to find a new roomate. Because of the latest episode I now live in hell.

    I hope everything will work out; if it was written in the contract that he had to keep the place neat; you should hire a maid and make him pay by increasing the rent. I know what kind of stress that could be put on you; I always say there is enough stress at work you do not need it at home too.
  • Reply 8 of 11
    scadboyscadboy Posts: 189member
    You call that a friekin' "horror story"

    buckle your seatbelt?

    The summer after my freshman year my b/f and I moved out of the dorms and into a little duplex on the outskirts of the college ghetto south of Forsyth park in Savannah with a couple of his friends. It had three bedrooms, two bathrooms, nice big kitchen, living room, and even a little backyard, it was pretty nice and decent rent-wise.

    The first three months were generally great, being that the two roommates were back home for the summer, while paying their share of the rent, so it was just me and my b/f.

    A few problems cropped up early though. One of the roommates had volunteered us to watch some kittens for a friend of his for "two weeks," at the beginning of the summer and told us this right before he left for break. So we magically had a momma cat and six kittens to look after. It seemed okay, we wanted to try to be nice, and the owner of the kittens was going to scoop them up just as soon as she returned to Savannah from a little two-week jaunt home, and we were going to get some cash for it.

    A month passes, we still have the cats, their owner has yet to return to Savannah, and we have no way to get ahold of her since she's out of state. After six weeks we gave all the kittens away, but we kept the mama cat (she kinda grew on us). Her owner finally arrives back in Savannah in September, three months later. She apologizes, then gets angry when we tell her we gave away all the kittens. It's not like it was a purebred or anything, total mutts. She ends up giving us $50 for food and litter and such, and took the mama cat back.

    Other than that, it was pretty smooth for the summer, except for some problems with the landlord and the house. The house was supposed to be finished and liveable by May 1st, but when we moved in on the 28th the laundry machines and the oven weren't hooked up, and it took a good month after we moved in before he got around to doing it, so we ate alot of ramen and anything we could make in a toaster oven for the first month, and took our clothes down to a scary ghetto-ass laundromat.

    When september came and the roommates came back, serious problems started to crop up. Ok, my b/f and I are gay, the two roommates are straight, they were well aware of the situation when we all sat down and signed the lease, they had been friends of my b/f since the previous fall, they knew two boys would be having gay sex frequently in the room adjacent to theirs for the next year, and while we wouldn't be going at it on the kitchen table, we would most likely be hugging and kissing outside the bounds of our bedroom from time to time.

    First day with the roommates back, me and my b/f are making dinner in the kitchen, I get a hug and a peck on the cheek and one roommate flips out and yells "watch the ****in' pda fags." He thought he was being cute when he called us "fags," despite our frequent requests that he stop. "Roomie #1" as we'll call him, was by far the most problematic of the two, "Roomie #2" was easier to live with, but he was the one who set us up with the cats, and his unwillingness to stand up to "Roomie #1" was frustrating.

    Roomie #1 was fond of throwing parties frequently, not just like every weekend, but like, in the middle of the week for no reason. And we're not talking about like quiet little get togethers for wine and cheese and polite conversation, we're talking "bring your friends, bring a keg, bring a bong, call and ambluance" type of parties that would start conveniently right after my b/f and I left for our jobs and end far too long after we had gotten home from work.

    We called the cops on our own house several times to get the parties broken up. Roomie #1 just liked to invite fifty to hundred of his closest friends over to the house to get ****ed up, and while he would be enjoying his waterbed while tripping on acid, his friends would be vomitting in and around our bathroom, eating our food, and stealing things from our room.

    On one occassion a friend of Roomie #1 put his arm through the glass in our front door, and none of them would call and ambulance because they were all tripping, so I had to call 911 for the kid and sit on the steps with him, trying to talk him down and keep him calm as he just about bled to death.

    Our front door had a key code lock, and Roomie #1 gave it to just about all of his "friends," inviting them to come over and enjoy the cable Tv and whatever was in the fridge. One afternoon, a friend of his got an eyeful, my b/f and I were home from classes, and not expecting anyone home for another three hours, as both Roomies were in class, we started going at it in the living room. Sure enough, a friend of Roomie #1 walks in, freaks the hell out, and runs off.

    One day, Roomie #1 decided to get some animals, even though they were forbidden in the lease, and everyone else had asked him not to. He got a dog and a cat, netiher of which got much training or attention, they were both prone to squatting everywhere in the house, and he would frequently call me or my b/f asking us to take out his animals. At one point, it was obvious the dog wasn't doing well, he was a few months old, hadn't had any of his shots, and he just started to look rather ill. We talked to Roomie #1 about it, but he just brushed us off and ignored it.

    At the end of that week, his girlfriend had been walking the dog, and when she brought him inside, he started to just randomly bleed from his mouth, and ended up collapsing on the steps, she dragged him inside and he died on the living room floor, convulsing and howling until he just stopped moving. I was at work when I got a phone call from my b/f about the dog around 5pm, this had all happened right before he left for work. When I got home at 1am, the dog was still in the middle of living room floor, in a puddle of blood piss and feces, covered with a blanket. Roommate #1 and his friends were in his room smoking weed, when we asked that he do something about the dog, and pointed out the 24 hour hotline for animal control, he refused to do anything. He eventually moved the dog into the hallway and half-assedly cleaned up the mess on the floor.

    Roomie #1 also had a problem with tidying the kitchen after he was done with it, but not just leaving a few dishes in the sink, more like slathering raw meat all over the counter tops and leaving it overnight, leaving puddles of maple syrup on the floor, burning things in the oven and leaving them there, forgetting to turn off the stove or oven. I came home from work to find something on fire in the oven more than once.

    So you're probably asking "so what did you do about it?" Well, everything I listed above happened in the first three weeks Roomie #1 came back to Savannah. At the end of wich, we spoke to him about everything that had happened, and gave him an opportunity to improve. While Roomie #2 agreed with everything we had to say, he was unwilling to go about evicting him because he didn't want to seem like the "bad guy," and compromise their friendship. So another three weeks passed, all hell continued to break loose, and my b/f and I were apartment hunting six months into our lease.

    We did our part to find replacement roomies, put up flyers, ran ads, all that, We didn't want to put one of our friends in that situation, we much preferred to screw over a complete stranger. Everytime we had someone over to look at the place, something bad happened. The first time, Roomie #1's girlfriend came running out of his bedroom naked and screaming as he chased her screaming obscenities. The second time, despite having spent the better part of the morning cleaning the house, Roomie #1 decided to make a big dinner for himself, and made a huge smelly mess in the kitchen, put his creation in the oven, and went to his room to bake while his food did the same. He forgot about it, and just as our prospective sublietter arrived, the fire alarm was going off and flames were shooting out of the oven.

    We realized that we were not getting out of their before the end of our lease. So we just did our best to avoid both roommates for the last six months. Things got worse, very worse. The parties increased, the foolishness trippled, and Roomie #1 got another dog. We ended up leaving two month early, but not without having to pay for those two months with the balance of my IRS refund.

    We kind of won in the end though, the landlord called us to tell us that they had left a month early, without getting their deposits back, and if we wanted to clean the house we could have what was left. The place was obscene when we came to "tidy it up." There was food in the fridge that looked like a middle school science experiment, broken beer bottles were everywhere, our room was destroyed, Roomie #1's bathroom was covered in kitty litter and used condoms, Roomie #2's room was suprisngly clean.

    We cleaned what we could, and we ended up getting the full amount of our deposits back, and the boys got zilch. Tecnically, we "should have" split what was left with them, but since the didn't leave a forwarding address or contact info with the landlord, he gave it all to us, but he did have to take out about half of it, since the boys only paid part of the rent for the last month.

    We had moved into a small apartment, just me and my b/f, and lived there for a full year in complete bliss. It was much smaller and not nearly as nice as our first apartment, but we were much much much happier. We just now moved into a huge, gorgeous house with a few roommates, Everyone in the house has had bad experiences with roommates, so we all came into this with hopes of avoiding serious problems.

    It's a huge three story house on Jones street, the single most beautiful street in all of the north america. We've got four bedrooms, two and half bathrooms, a huge kithen, living room, and dining room. Everyone has their space, and everyone keeps the common areas tidy. It's been damn near ideal so far, and we're hoping it stays that way.


  • Reply 9 of 11
    ebbyebby Posts: 3,110member
    Ouch! My eyes! :eek: They Burn! (Long post)

    Feel sorry about the dog though. That person should never be allowed to own pets again. <img src="graemlins/oyvey.gif" border="0" alt="[No]" />

    [ 06-10-2002: Message edited by: Ebby ]</p>
  • Reply 10 of 11
    Yeah, you should have called ASPCA about the dog... from the time it looked ill to when it passed away. People that don't respect animals are always unpleasantly surprised to see armed ASPCA officers show up and inform them that what they are doing is indeed quite illegal.
  • Reply 11 of 11
    groveratgroverat Posts: 10,872member

    Remember that he's paying you money, you seem to act like this is some random guy off the street holed up in an extra room of yours.

    My roommate is not clean. He doesn't clean up much and he has different ideas than me as to when it's time to take out the trash (I think when it's full, he thinks when it starts to smell) and when to do the dishes (I think when the dishwasher is full, he thinks when the dishwasher and both sinks are full). But that's what they are; differences.

    Aside from that he's a great roommate, so I have no complaints. Thank your lucky stars he's nice and quiet and just a little messy.
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