David Beckham

Posted:
in General Discussion edited January 2014
Uh oh.



Watch out for the News of the World on Sunday. Your eyes are going to pop out yer heads.



(David Beckham is a world famous football (aka 'soccer') player, happily married to a Spice Girl, with two very young children. He recently went to Japan (island in the Pacific Ocean) where there was a football tournament (the "World Cup").



You heard it here first.



Probably.

Comments

  • Reply 1 of 17
    [quote]Originally posted by Harald:

    <strong>Uh oh.



    Watch out for the News of the World on Sunday. Your eyes are going to pop out yer heads.



    (David Beckham is a world famous football (aka 'soccer') player, happily married to a Spice Girl, with two very young children. He recently went to Japan (island in the Pacific Ocean) where there was a football tournament (the "World Cup").



    You heard it here first.



    Probably.</strong><hr></blockquote>



    He's also a tosser and he probably cheated on his wife like every football player. That said, he could have done a lot better in the first place than that anorexic, stuck up, cockney cont.
  • Reply 2 of 17
    [quote]Originally posted by tonton:

    <strong>...and if he's married to a Spice girl and cheats on her, I doubt he's literally a tosser. Maybe figuratively speaking, though...</strong><hr></blockquote>







    Did you see the Ali G interview with them for Comic Relief?



    Ali: "Now Beckham, just cuz this is for comic relief don't mean you'z can speak in a funny voice"



    Golden.
  • Reply 3 of 17
    haraldharald Posts: 2,152member
    You said it.



    "Cheating" is to be expected from footballers.



    Just "cheating" wouldn't make your eyes pop out.



    Heh.
  • Reply 4 of 17
    [quote]Originally posted by Harald:

    <strong>

    "Cheating" is to be expected from footballers.

    </strong>

    <hr></blockquote>



    If it turns out that he's gay there will be mass suicides of teenage girls across the nation. Every single female I have ever spoken to adores David Beckham.
  • Reply 5 of 17
    [quote]Originally posted by stupider...likeafox:

    <strong>



    If it turns out that he's gay there will be mass suicides of teenage girls across the nation. Every single female I have ever spoken to adores David Beckham.</strong><hr></blockquote>



    What do you mean turns out?



    If he comes out you mean.
  • Reply 6 of 17
    Let's not pussyfoot around.



    He shagged Michael Owen's sister.



    Yes he did.
  • Reply 7 of 17
    [quote]Originally posted by Hassan i Sabbah:

    <strong>Let's not pussyfoot around.



    He shagged Michael Owen's sister.



    Yes he did.</strong><hr></blockquote>



    I don't follow football so am I missing some significance here.



    Are they teammates, rivals?



    Is she married, ugly?



    Why is this worse than bedding a couple of star-struck teenage groupies which seems to be what everyone else does?
  • Reply 8 of 17
    haraldharald Posts: 2,152member
    Well yes, they're teammates.



    In the England squad.



    Owen plays for Liverpool (currently no. 2 in the Premiership).



    His sister's quite a chubster.



    What's signficant is the extraordinary amount of public fuss DB and his wife Posh Spice make about being in love (which will now come back and bite him on the arse).



    Hassan, however, is sadly short of the full facts -- as usual -- which will make this a serious eye-opener.
  • Reply 9 of 17
    [quote]Becks denies wicked whispers

    Staff and agencies

    Friday November 29 2002

    The Guardian





    David Beckham has issued a statement saying there is "absolutely no truth"

    in rumours about him which have been flying around cyberspace during the

    past few days.



    Email users around the UK and beyond have been circulating claims about the

    Manchester United star which first appeared on the celebrity gossip website,

    Popbitch.



    But in a statement, his spokeswoman warned that repeating the rumours could

    result in legal action.



    The spokeswoman said: "We are aware that there are malicious rumours

    circulating in the media about David Beckham.



    "There is absolutely no truth whatsoever in these rumours and the web site

    we believe to be the source of these rumours has been contacted and all

    defamatory material has been removed.



    "No publication of these rumours should be made as it would result in legal

    liability for defamation."



    Beckham, who is currently recovering from a rib injury, and his wife

    Victoria returned from a Caribbean holiday yesterday with their two sons

    Brooklyn and Romeo. The couple spent a week enjoying the sunshine in

    Barbados and flew back to Heathrow Airport.



    The internet rumours come shortly after the couple were forced to step up

    security following an alleged kidnap plot. They now have a more visible

    minder presence and have taken greater security precautions at their homes.



    Copyright Guardian Newspapers Limited <hr></blockquote>



    From an email I got today.
  • Reply 10 of 17
    stunnedstunned Posts: 1,096member
    This guy earns 100,000 pounds a week, not inclusive of advertising endorsements. He's famous, captain of the England squad, own 4 cars..........



    Some guys got all the luck.... Geez
  • Reply 11 of 17
    [quote]Originally posted by Harald:

    <strong>



    Hassan, however, is sadly short of the full facts -- as usual -- which will make this a serious eye-opener.</strong><hr></blockquote>



    I will give a statement. The facts are these.



    I shagged Posh Spice.



    I shagged Michael Owen's sister.



    I shagged Michael Owen.



    I snorted cocaine off David Beckham's back on Alex Ferguson's desk.



    I wish I could say I was sorry. But I would do it again.
  • Reply 12 of 17
    haraldharald Posts: 2,152member
    (wonders how to do this when he can't reveal a source and doesn't really want to reveal who he actually is)



    The rumours floating around for the past few days could well be false -- actually the Owen's sister one is relatively new to me.



    The rumours I heard several MONTHS ago, confirmed by two sources, are I am certain, totally, utterly true.



    And WILL come out.
  • Reply 13 of 17
    So what happened?
  • Reply 14 of 17
    Beckham snagged Owen's sister.



    And everyone else on the island.



    The rail-thinness is undoubtedly caused by railing a bit too much of a white powdery substance.
  • Reply 15 of 17
    jeffyboyjeffyboy Posts: 1,055member
    "Bend It Like Beckham," indeed!

    <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laughing]" />



    Jeff
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