"The CEO who gave us the Monkey Boy dance is reported to have jumped about the stage to Michael Jackson’s Wanna be startin’ somethin’ – the song he played at that fateful 1983 meeting – while screaming “the sound of Microsoft!”
Reports talk of tears streaming down Steve's face as he gave his final speech.
Ballmer closed on (I’ve had) the time of my life from Dirty Dancing, continuing to dance and run around the stage. Employees were shaking hands with Ballmer and screaming “we love you” through the routine, we're so reliably informed."
Someone get the video!
I'd never watched the MonkeyBoy Dance until now.
That. Is. A. Really. Embarrassing. Performance.:no:
Microsoft should issue a takedown notice.
This is rapidly devolving to one of those classic "XKCD" comics, where the protagonist can't step away from the computer, because "someone is WRONG on the Internet!"
"Doing more," is for sure!
Virus scans, disk defrags, annual clean re-installs, high upgrade fees, weird products (hello, RT), axed products, endless configuration.
What more could customers want?
What stood out to me is that he didn't bother mentioning Samsung, which to me indicates his agreement that they're just copying Apple. I haven't used Windows 8 but at least MS is doing something different. Ballmer is an idiot but MS has done some good work lately (Xbox, Bing, and even W8 looks interesting) and I wish them well in the future. I certainly like their approach better than Google, Amazon, Samsung, or BlackBerry.
Breaking: Steve Ballmer to team up with Scott Forstall and create third computer company to take on Apple. The Ball-Stall Conglomerate plans to have its first machine out when it feels like it.
Ballmer is an idiot, that's a given—but seriously, what can they do?
Apple is in a unique position. They're supreme in the mobile space (unless you use the dishonest ploy of the Fandroids of lumping all "Android" phones together as if all these companies shared profits), and they also have the most profitable line of desktops and laptops. That market ("Post-PC era" or not) is not going to go away, but it's going to shrink considerably. Apple can manage that transition smoothly (yes, I said "smooth";)) since they control both sides. Who else can do that?
Unless Microsoft starts making "real" computers—which would spell the end for HP et. al., already near death in a race to the bottom—or they remain dependent on the fortunes of the PC makers, who are, again, cutting each other's throats for the cheapest price. If they want to maintain Window's market share, they may be forced to start making their own boxes.
Instead they have two completely disjoint divisions, one committed to Windows, one committed to making Nokia phones saleable—and now some mutants trying to create a laptop-tablet hybrid that nobody wants. As the PC market declines, so does 2/3 of their business. They're going to coast on momentum for a while, maybe decades, but creativity is just not in their genes. They stole Windows, they wrote MS Word, but if they hadn't been creating it for the Mac they never would have—Hell, they just bought DOS, which was just an unauthorized port of CP/M to begin with. I don't see any radical new ideas coming from them—but meanwhile, it's Apple that "can't innovate", and "didn't invent" any of the things they did innovate. People's misperceptions will keep Microsoft in business for a while, but their dominance is not long for this world.
Thats what you get from a piss poor looser. He has basically singlehandedly made microsoft irrelevant. And hes walking away with millions for doing it.
Look past the condescending, misguided metaphor of "fashionable" and there is some truth to what he is saying. But you have to have the intellectual curiosity and wherewithal to look past your own biased filter, too.
Jony Ive says something like, "when something is simple and well designed, it becomes beautiful by default" (heavily paraphrased, sorry).
If that kind of beautiful is what Ballmer means by "fashionable", then I'm a permanent customer of fashion.
MS should be striving to be ALL the things their competitors are, and more. They should be trying to create "fashionable" products (aka design so excellent that is naturally beautiful AND desirable as a result), high-quality products that are ALSO affordable and a good value, truly smart products that extend and enhance knowledge (making knowledge accessible at the flick of a finger)…
In fact, the products that accomplish those things ARE the most enabling, letting us just get things done. "Doing things"… yes, Stevie, except, you need the first three to accomplish the last in today's market.
Him not seeing that, it's easy to see why his time is up.
Even Valve is making their own OS these days, OS software is becoming commoditized. MS should go back to their roots as an app company.
They have missed such an opportunity to dominate with Office on the iPad. And games are hugely popular on these new devices, they should make more games, they've done some great games in the past.
Clearly the strategy of make your own hardware is not working out for them, it's just not in their corporate DNA, but software writing is!
Too bad he is leaving; with the new CEO, Apple may face real competition.
He played a big role in decelerating MS allowing Apple to make an spectacular come back.
Besides, he was one of a kind cheerleader, we'll miss you Steve.
Its likely too late for the successor to do much of a dent in the smartphone and tablet markets, how many times will they revamp Windows? And when they are done, where will the competition be?
Steve Jobs turned Apple around, with iMacs, with iPod, Apple stores, virtual online stores, with great strategy, with great people. MS wasn't decelerating when Apple introduced the iPhone in 2007, and then iPad a year later, in fact MS was a top player in the smartphone OS market back then.
Comments
I'd never watched the MonkeyBoy Dance until now.
That. Is. A. Really. Embarrassing. Performance.:no:
Microsoft should issue a takedown notice.
Perhaps he's suggesting that with him leaving, Microsoft will now have unlimited potential.
This is rapidly devolving to one of those classic "XKCD" comics, where the protagonist can't step away from the computer, because "someone is WRONG on the Internet!"
You got that much right.
Steve Jobs got it right. Microsoft does not have to fail in order for Apple to succeed.
Corollary - We don't have to bash other companies just because we like Apple.
More critical updates!!!
Breaking: Steve Ballmer to team up with Scott Forstall and create third computer company to take on Apple. The Ball-Stall Conglomerate plans to have its first machine out when it feels like it.
Apple is in a unique position. They're supreme in the mobile space (unless you use the dishonest ploy of the Fandroids of lumping all "Android" phones together as if all these companies shared profits), and they also have the most profitable line of desktops and laptops. That market ("Post-PC era" or not) is not going to go away, but it's going to shrink considerably. Apple can manage that transition smoothly (yes, I said "smooth";)) since they control both sides. Who else can do that?
Unless Microsoft starts making "real" computers—which would spell the end for HP et. al., already near death in a race to the bottom—or they remain dependent on the fortunes of the PC makers, who are, again, cutting each other's throats for the cheapest price. If they want to maintain Window's market share, they may be forced to start making their own boxes.
Instead they have two completely disjoint divisions, one committed to Windows, one committed to making Nokia phones saleable—and now some mutants trying to create a laptop-tablet hybrid that nobody wants. As the PC market declines, so does 2/3 of their business. They're going to coast on momentum for a while, maybe decades, but creativity is just not in their genes. They stole Windows, they wrote MS Word, but if they hadn't been creating it for the Mac they never would have—Hell, they just bought DOS, which was just an unauthorized port of CP/M to begin with. I don't see any radical new ideas coming from them—but meanwhile, it's Apple that "can't innovate", and "didn't invent" any of the things they did innovate. People's misperceptions will keep Microsoft in business for a while, but their dominance is not long for this world.
PLEASE DON'T GO! Ballmer can lead MS down a slow death spiral. He's the John Sculley of MS.
Thats what you get from a piss poor looser. He has basically singlehandedly made microsoft irrelevant. And hes walking away with millions for doing it.
Look past the condescending, misguided metaphor of "fashionable" and there is some truth to what he is saying. But you have to have the intellectual curiosity and wherewithal to look past your own biased filter, too.
Jony Ive says something like, "when something is simple and well designed, it becomes beautiful by default" (heavily paraphrased, sorry).
If that kind of beautiful is what Ballmer means by "fashionable", then I'm a permanent customer of fashion.
MS should be striving to be ALL the things their competitors are, and more. They should be trying to create "fashionable" products (aka design so excellent that is naturally beautiful AND desirable as a result), high-quality products that are ALSO affordable and a good value, truly smart products that extend and enhance knowledge (making knowledge accessible at the flick of a finger)…
In fact, the products that accomplish those things ARE the most enabling, letting us just get things done. "Doing things"… yes, Stevie, except, you need the first three to accomplish the last in today's market.
Him not seeing that, it's easy to see why his time is up.
Bye bye Ballmer.
Even Valve is making their own OS these days, OS software is becoming commoditized. MS should go back to their roots as an app company.
They have missed such an opportunity to dominate with Office on the iPad. And games are hugely popular on these new devices, they should make more games, they've done some great games in the past.
Clearly the strategy of make your own hardware is not working out for them, it's just not in their corporate DNA, but software writing is!
They have missed such an opportunity to dominate with Office on the iPad.
And Apple is squandering their chance to make iWork the Office of the next decade or more…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Paradox_of_Choice:_Why_More_Is_Less
Like this?
https://myspace.com/yourememberthat/video/coffee-coffee-coffee-moscow-on-the-hudson/30092257
Too bad he is leaving; with the new CEO, Apple may face real competition.
He played a big role in decelerating MS allowing Apple to make an spectacular come back.
Besides, he was one of a kind cheerleader, we'll miss you Steve.
Its likely too late for the successor to do much of a dent in the smartphone and tablet markets, how many times will they revamp Windows? And when they are done, where will the competition be?
Steve Jobs turned Apple around, with iMacs, with iPod, Apple stores, virtual online stores, with great strategy, with great people. MS wasn't decelerating when Apple introduced the iPhone in 2007, and then iPad a year later, in fact MS was a top player in the smartphone OS market back then.
edit:grammer
And Apple is squandering their chance to make iWork the Office of the next decade or more…
Yes, they really need to put more effort in to that product. Regular updates would be a nice start.