Crimes and misdemeanors

Posted:
in General Discussion edited January 2014
Okay, this thread will probably get locked for being inappropriate. C'est la vie.



If you 'could' commit a crime or misdemeanor (but WOULDN'T, of course...heaven forbid!) what would it be and why?



I'm afraid I fantasize about scaring the pants off vandals and graffiti artists. They make me so angry, how they deface property that others have worked hard to make attractive.



A small community of people built a little church themselves - by hand. A unitarian church on a nearby corner. It's small, but when the landscaping is grown, the site will be quite lovely. They put expensive lettering on a low wall with the name of their church. Over the last two weekends, thieves have come and pried off various letters for their own use. They used to do the same to the large gold letters for my neighborhood. Finally we took our metal letters down completely and now have raised letters that are actually part of the stucco wall and can't be removed.



I fantasize about staking myself out with a rifle on a weekend night, and waiting for these creeps to show up to finish removing the letters from the church wall. Then I'd like to shoot into the ground 8-10 feet away from these loser vandals - far enough away not to hurt them, but close enough to scare the pants off them.



I'm so sick of this kind of stuff. You probably think I'm crazy. Maybe I am. I am just so tired of people committing anti-social acts like this that deface neighborhoods, and then getting away with it completely - because the police have more serious problems to deal with.



I wish to point out that I would NEVER actually DO this; but I DO fantasize about doing it. I'd love to see the horrified looks on their punk faces. I'm sure they're gang members, the creeps. I'm sure they do MUCH worse things than just steal letters.



So does anyone else ever fantasize about crimes and misdemeanors you might like to commit (but never would, of course)?



Just wondering if anyone else has anger fantasies like mine.



Thanks for any replies.



Carol
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Comments

  • Reply 1 of 30
    hassan i sabbahhassan i sabbah Posts: 3,987member
    Murbot?



    Over to you.
  • Reply 2 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by tonton

    I'd tell you but I'd soon have the FBI at my door. Needless to say, despite my deepest fantasies, I will not be committing any crimes against anyone.



    Oh, and I'd like to throw a cream pie in Tung Chee Hwa's face.




    So you DO have anger fantasies, then. I wonder if everyone does.
  • Reply 3 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    I sometimes think that people who commit heinous physical crimes against others should have the same done to them. See how 'they' like it. Especially those who abuse women and children.
  • Reply 4 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Hassan i Sabbah

    Murbot?



    Over to you.




    This is about anger fantasies, Hassan.



    NOT something that anyone would actually do.



    Maybe I didn't make that clear enough.
  • Reply 5 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by tonton

    I'd tell you but I'd soon have the FBI at my door. Needless to say, despite my deepest fantasies, I will not be committing any crimes against anyone.



    Oh, and I'd like to throw a cream pie in Tung Chee Hwa's face.




    Ooo, a cream pie. Let's see, whose face is just crying out for a cream pie?



    Maybe Sean Penn. He always looks so bitter and cranky. And his face looks parched with all the annoyance he seems to feel about life. A nice cream pie would act as a moisturizer. (I can't believe Robin Wright has to wake up to his face every morning. Urgh.)
  • Reply 6 of 30
    brussellbrussell Posts: 9,812member
    I have fantasies about making Arab men get naked and putting hoods over their heads and having them pile up on top of one another.
  • Reply 7 of 30
    ghost_user_nameghost_user_name Posts: 22,667member
    BnE... take what I want, leave what I don't. It crosses my mind everytime I see a cardboard box of some expensive electronic infront of someone's house waiting to be picked up... it's like a sign telling people that this house has good shit inside.



    But I would never do it.
  • Reply 8 of 30
    billybobskybillybobsky Posts: 1,914member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Carol A

    I sometimes think that people who commit heinous physical crimes against others should have the same done to them. See how 'they' like it. Especially those who abuse women and children.



    what about those who abuse men?
  • Reply 9 of 30
    billybobskybillybobsky Posts: 1,914member
    I once fantasized about installing a minigun weapon system in the grass at my college to take out my roommate as he happily passed by on his unicycle. god, i hated him...



    unfortunately, I realized that murder is only good when your victim suffers the consequences of that murder but not the murder itself. at the same time, i wouldn't kill an innocent... this conundrum is the very essence of why murder is wrong...
  • Reply 10 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by billybobsky

    what about those who abuse men?



    Well, I said "especially" women and children. That does not preclude men. But women and children are generally smaller and weaker, so brutality against them seems especially appalling.



    Anyone who abuses another could learn a few pertinent 'lessons' from a taste of his/her own medicine.



    I know 'cruel and unusual punishment' is against the law of the land. But some people do such vile things, that the idea of 'an eye for an eye' does cross my mind from time to time.



    (The kind of person I *actually* am is one who couldn't possibly harm any living creature. But I have dark thoughts when I hear of the terrible things that some criminals enjoy doing to their victims. And they 'do' enjoy their crimes; that's the very worst part. )
  • Reply 11 of 30
    chinneychinney Posts: 1,019member
    Well, yes, I do sometimes have such fantasies.



    But, based on the title, I had hoped that this thread would be about that wonderful Woody Allen film of that name. Really great movie. And certainly exploration of the 'fantasy of crime' turned into reality - and the moral consequences, and personal price, of trying to get away with such crime - was what the movie was about. I recommend giving it a view.
  • Reply 12 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by billybobsky

    I once fantasized about installing a minigun weapon system in the grass at my college to take out my roommate as he happily passed by on his unicycle. god, i hated him...



    unfortunately, I realized that murder is only good when your victim suffers the consequences of that murder but not the murder itself. at the same time, i wouldn't kill an innocent... this conundrum is the very essence of why murder is wrong...




    I loathed one of my roommates too, and fantasized about doing her in. She was so completely self-centered and inconsiderate - not toward me, but toward her parents and grandmother - that I fantasized about standing on a chair next to her bed while she was sleeping, and then jumping onto her back and snapping her spine.



    Pretty stupid fantasy. No one else would room with her, but I didn't know her very well at first and agreed to do so. I wonder if she ever changed.
  • Reply 13 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Chinney

    Well, yes, I do sometimes have such fantasies.





    Care to give an example?



    And thanks for the film rec.



    However, I'm afraid I'm not a Woody Allen fan. Mostly because of his 'crimes and misdemeanors'. \
  • Reply 14 of 30
    outsideroutsider Posts: 6,008member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by BRussell

    I have fantasies about making Arab men get naked and putting hoods over their heads and having them pile up on top of one another.



    Have you ever thought of joining the army?
  • Reply 15 of 30
    shawnjshawnj Posts: 6,656member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Outsider

    Have you ever thought of joining the army?



    -- I love it.
  • Reply 16 of 30
    burningwheelburningwheel Posts: 1,827member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Carol A

    I loathed one of my roommates too, and fantasized about doing her in. She was so completely self-centered and inconsiderate - not toward me, but toward her parents and grandmother - that I fantasized about standing on a chair next to her bed while she was sleeping, and then jumping onto her back and snapping her spine.



    Pretty stupid fantasy. No one else would room with her, but I didn't know her very well at first and agreed to do so. I wonder if she ever changed.




    do we have issues



    i sometimes think that some people don't deserve to live but i've never ever considered doing anything to them. hell, i feel bad if i hurt a bug



    geez..what a thread Carol
  • Reply 17 of 30
    I would rob a bank...shit, I NEED to rob a bank....stop putting up threads like these!



  • Reply 18 of 30
    crazychestercrazychester Posts: 1,339member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Artman @_@

    I would rob a bank...shit, I NEED to rob a bank....stop putting up threads like these!







    Artman you're obviously going to have to start selling your body on the street. Sorry, I'm not trying to trivialise your financial woes.



    Alternatively, we could do a bank job together. That was my first thought on seeing this thread title (sorry Carol not really into the whole revenge style killing thing). Or should I say a bank heist. A really clever one, like in the movies. Wrong as it may be, I can never help but be intrigued by people who commit really clever crimes.



    A few years ago there was a gang doing bank jobs round Sydney. Now the fact is, most criminals are actually pretty dumb and manage to bring themselves unstuck especially by getting greedy and dropping their co-conspirators in it.



    But these guys were clearly old pros. They've done maybe half a dozen jobs and then disappeared off the face of the planet. Whatever "arrangements" they had, they've stuck to them.



    Then there was a gang who robbed the Bank of China in Sydney. This was straight out of the movies. They've broken into the basement of the building next door and then drilled through a wall into the Bank of China's basement where all the safety deposit boxes were. Got away with millions. Cops reckoned they were in there the whole weekend.



    But here's the best bit. A lot of the people who had stuff stolen from their SD boxes had stuff stashed in there for tax avoidance purposes. So the story went that a lot more stuff went missing than was ever accounted for because a lot of it couldn't be declared to the cops after the fact.



    Karma at work. Ya gotta love it.
  • Reply 19 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by burningwheel

    do we have issues



    i sometimes think that some people don't deserve to live but i've never ever considered doing anything to them. hell, i feel bad if i hurt a bug



    geez..what a thread Carol




    There was a black widow spider in my outside utility/laundry room (back when I had my condo). I was afraid it might bite my dog, so I sprayed it with some kind of chemical cleaning foam, assuming it would be lethal. When I came back later and found the black widow gone, I imagined it struggling away, suffering horrible agonies. I've never been able to 'personally' kill an insect since then (not that I ever could 'before' that, but you know what I mean).



    I don't really have issues, burningwheel. I 'harbor' no long-term anger in my heart. But anger does spring up in me when I see the senseless damage inflicted upon neighborhoods by vandals. Defacing business' window-glass with box-cutters - a permanent, expensive and very disheartening crime. Defacing the inside walls of elevators with gang symbols - marks that will be there for decades, in very nice, artistically-designed and decorated buildings, like the medical building where my doctor is located.



    Men seem to feel free to express their anger, but women often feel obliged to repress theirs. It's culturally unseemly for women to express anger.["geez...what a thread Carol"]. I think that's one reason women suffer from depression more than men.



    So the anger I feel occasionally, about this or that, I seldom get to express. Therefore I fantasize. I refuse to feel guilty about doing so, and I refuse the implied label you seem to wish to impart to me of being 'sick and twisted'. So there! (attempt at expressing anger) \



    And frankly, I would have started almost *any* thread to try to breathe some life into the top of the board.
  • Reply 20 of 30
    carol acarol a Posts: 1,043member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by tonton

    Well, you missed my post about what should happen to the cold-blooded murderers of the transvestite in California?



    Yes, I guess I 'did' miss that post. What was the name of the thread?
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