'Twas the night before MacWorld.
'Twas the night before Macworld and all through the house not a creature was stirring not even a mouse. Our old buddy Steve was asleep at his house. Some hopes were hung on rumors that spread in anticipation that LCD iMacs and a G5 would appear. The Mac fans were pacing all the night with visions of bake offs dancing in their heads. And Schiller in his X-large pajamas and Steve in his turtleneck had all set up for the ensuing keynote. Out on the lawn there arose such a clatter I ran to the window to see what was he matter, for I thought it was Schiller but the man was fatter. When what to my wondering eyes should appear but miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer. With a little old driver so charismatic and quick I knew in a moment it must be Steve. So down through the chimney Steve came with a bound. He was dressed as usual from his head to his foot, and his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot. A bundle of toys he had flung on his back, and he looked like a plumber I could see his butt crack (joke no rhyme ideas). His eyes how they twinkled his dimples how merry! His cheeks were like roses his nose like a cherry. His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow, and the beard on his chin was as gray and white as the snow. Schiller was there too, he had a broad face and round little belly that shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly. But soon his team gave a whistle and away they all flew like the down of a thistle. Oh And One More Thing, I heard him exclaim ere he drove out of sight happy Macworld to all and to all a good night!
Comments
[ 12-18-2001: Message edited by: Eupfhoria ]</p>
*BUMP TO TOP*
[quote] "Twas the night before Macworld,
and all thru the forums
were rumors and wonders
of what was before us.
Opinions were posted
to the forums with care
In hopes that a miracle
would soon be there.
The people were nestled
in the glow of there screens,
with visions of iMacs with detachable screens...
As night turned to day,
and apple began streaming,
the Quicktime servers all began beaming...
A keynote that rang
throughout the land from broadband servers,
to satalites,
to land.
A silence came over, all the people
with great anticapation,
for Steve Jobs was there
with a opening salutation.
And wonders to display
with increasing anticipation.
More rapid than superdrives,
his fans they came,
With visions of Lucite,
with a Platinum, Inner grain...
With a wink of his eye,
and a twitch of his head,
then I knew there was nothing,
left then to dread.
As he layed of his finger,
upon the enter key,
the system came up,
and worked perfectly.
The update updated,
the deletes, they deleted,
the inquiries inquired,
the closings completed.
Jobs tested each whistle,
and tested each bell,
with nary a bomb,
and all had gone well.
OS X was now updated,
the tests were concluded,
the users' last changes,
were even included.
Then the users exclaimed,
with a snarl and a taunt,
"What about hardware?"
with a nervous response.
Now Mister Jobs had waited,
with a certain tendency,
to the end of the show,
for the "Hardware" you see.
From beyond the shadows,
a cart came a'flying,
draped in secrecy,
and hidden from spying.
The new apple product,
was waiting beneath,
And the great church of apple,
cried with relief.
For there prayers had been answered,
when jobs removed the sheet...
Was it an iPad?
was it an iMac?
A tablet with wireless connectivity?
And so ends this story,
to short,
toot sweet,
for the future of apple,
will soon make its mark in history!!"
© -- FERRO <hr></blockquote>
E PLURIBUS UNIX
-----------------------------
I love this place.
A Visit From Saint Steve
(with profound apologies to Clement C. Moore)
Twas the night before MacWorld and all through the house
Not a pixel was stirring, not even my mouse.
The Internet access was checked with great care
With hopes that Steve?s keynote would soon webcast there.
The AppleInsiders were snug in their beds
While visions of G5 chips danced in their heads.
My PowerMac was wailing iTunes in the night
While the Pismo was showing a throbbing green light.
When suddenly a power surge spun the disk platter
On my iMac, which began an incessant loud chatter!
Away to the keyboard I flew at a dash
Unplugged the printer and emptied the trash.
The screen on the iMac revealed a dim glow
A small dot appeared, and started to grow!
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear
A Quicktime 6 window through which I could peer
At a man in a turtle-neck shirt with long sleeves,
I knew in a moment it must be Saint Steve!
More rapid than Gigabit Ethernet frames
Came the sights of the hardware Steve started to name:
?New iMac, new PBook, new iBook and more!
The G5! Apollo! and gadgets galore!
To the highest known FLOPS, past the GigaHertz wall!
Now stash away, stash away, stash away all!?
As transfers with FireWire connections imply,
When hot-swapped to Macintosh ports on the fly,
So his aides and associates hid the new stuff
Making pre-MacWorld rumors all seem like a bluff.
Then a new Quicktime window appeared on my screen
With Avie Tevanian making the scene.
As Photoshop turned the P4s into toast,
His Steveness was making another big boast.
He was dressed all in black from his head to his foot,
And he walked like an Admin logged into the root.
With a ?Micro$oft $ux? sticker glued to his back,
He looked like a Slash-dotter ready to hack.
His eyes - how they twinkled, his haircut - how scary!
A bottle of water he always would carry.
He smiled as he thought of the upcoming show
With his ?Oh, one more thing? speech all ready to go.
The stump of a pencil he held in his hand,
Computing the reception of AirPort through sand.
My hard drive by this time was getting quite smelly,
Like a dead fish with Celeron chips in its belly.
I coughed from the smoke and Steve looked up at me
I feared I was caught and would no longer see.
But a smile crossed the lips of the iCEO
And I knew he was going to let this one go.
He spoke not a word but pulled out a remote
That was hooked to an iWalk displaying a note.
The camera zoomed in ?til the screen could be read :
?Macintosh Rules!? was all that it said.
He showed once again each new Mac and device,
From the Gigawire hubs right down to the mice.
And I heard him exclaim as he faded from sight,
?Happy MacWorld to All, All The Rumors Were Right!?
Steve silently groaned
"If they don't get dual G5s, AIers will moan!"
"Damn Motorola, damn them to hell!"
"And damn them for casting that 500 MHz spell!"
But alas there was big blue
with G5s galore
but that wasnt all
Jobs had much more in store
The forums at AI
were buzing with glee
and those new iMacs
Indeed, LCD
One more sleepless night
read the quote from its website
would Apple deliver?
and would the rumors be hindsight?
Jobs would be ready
with just "one more thing"
and all the fine Macheads
would be able to sing
And so concludes
this Macworld to date
Lets hope that our beloved Apple
can screw Bill Gates!
[ 01-06-2002: Message edited by: TigerWoods99 ]</p>
last year in NY i had the info on where you could find the satellite feed so i could watch it here in europe .
This year, the only info i find is for the US .
Anyone knows if it's available in europe to, i think it was on eutelsat last year .
please help...
'Twas the night before Macworld
and up in Steve's crib
a baller keynote
Ya dig?
"Nelly flosses platinum, shit I floss Titanium
Let's put the G5 up against their Itanium
64-bit you betta take that shit back
cause Intel you know the performance is whack
Then we'll test it with Northwood
and pimp that out too
I'll invite my boy Rubenstein, hell, all of the crew!
"Yo Stevey believe me this Mac's off the heezy!" was the call from downstairs of Ave Teveezy
Jobs, head back, was bangin iTunes
while some fool downstairs
was testing out Doom
"It's time to show M$, that Apple's str8 blazin'
with Jaguar on G2000, they know we can phase em
Keynote all set
iWalk in his hands
it was time for just one little last minute plan
But this bitches, this is classified
See you on the 7th
tell Dell not to hide
And so goes this story of Jobs at his crib
Peace out motha****as
and oh yea,
Let Apple Live
[ 01-06-2002: Message edited by: TigerWoods99 ]</p>