Strange iPod Grammar

rokrok
Posted:
in General Discussion edited January 2014
okay, i don't know why, but i somehow found myself in the battery discussion area of apple's website, when i noticed something odd... it's how apple refers to the ipod. or rather, how apple "refers to iPod."



for instance:



Quote:

Always make sure iPod has the latest software from Apple, as engineers may find new ways to optimize battery performance.



or



Quote:

It may seem obvious, but set iPod?s hold switch when you aren?t using it. This will prevent iPod controls from inadvertently waking up iPod and using unnecessary power. Also, if you are not listening to iPod, pause it, or turn it off by pressing the play button for two seconds.



never THE ipod or AN ipod, but just "ipod." it's vaguely reminiscent of SNL's Happy Fun Ball commercial. creepy...

Comments

  • Reply 1 of 5
    andersanders Posts: 6,523member
    Apple think their products are so special they need a grammatical category for itself. Like the royal first person plural.
  • Reply 2 of 5
    bergzbergz Posts: 1,045member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Anders

    Apple think their



    Or the British singularplural.



    --B
  • Reply 3 of 5
    andersanders Posts: 6,523member
    Or my own singural-confucius.



    Quote:

    Originally posted by Anders

    Apple think their products are so special they need a grammatical category for itself.



  • Reply 4 of 5
    placeboplacebo Posts: 5,767member
    iPod couldn't help but read your lips while you were in the Pod bay.
  • Reply 5 of 5
    rokrok Posts: 3,519member
    found the old SNL commercial, and a quick "find & replace" gives us this:



    Quote:

    iPod!



    \t? \tWarning: Pregnant women, the elderly and children under 10 should avoid prolonged exposure to iPod.

    \t? \tCaution: iPod may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

    \t? \tiPod Contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

    \t? \tDo not use iPod on concrete.



    Discontinue use of iPod if any of the following occurs:

    \t? \tItching

    \t? \tVertigo

    \t? \tDizziness

    \t? \tTingling in extremities

    \t? \tLoss of balance or coordination

    \t? \tSlurred speech

    \t? \tTemporary blindness

    \t? \tProfuse sweating

    \t? \tHeart palpitations



    If iPod begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.



    iPod may stick to certain types of skin.



    When not in use, iPod should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration...



    Failure to do so relieves the makers of iPod, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.



    Ingredients of iPod include an unknown glowing substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.



    iPod has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.



    Do not taunt iPod.



    iPod comes with a lifetime guarantee.



    iPod



    ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES!



    please note that the saudi arabia/iraq excerpt is legit, since the original parody came out during the first gulf war.
Sign In or Register to comment.