As Seen On TV

Posted:
in General Discussion edited January 2014
Anyone ever buy crap off of TV? I have purchased a Bowflex, which is pretty good product, of course it is the granddaddy of all TV products.



Most of it looks like $h!t.



For example, the internal antenna. Yeah, 20 bucks for a sticker. I bet that doesn't work.



I hate when they show someone who must be incredibly stupid making the most mundane task incredibly difficult, and being shown in black and white, sweat pouring off their faces just to tighten a screw or something, then we see some housewife in color all happy using her gatorgrip having no problems at all.



Another one I hate are all these ab products, especially those things you strap on and they vibrate...yeah like the models they show really got those abs sitting around with a cheap electrical belt. The kciker is during one commercial they actually have the nerve to say, while showing a guy (in black and white again) doing sit-ups, pausing him in mid-situp, pointing an arrow at his gut, and saying "and some exercises can even make your ab muscles bigger." Uh, excuse me, when was that a bad thing? "bigger" ab muscles will help you get the washboard abs...more muscle burns more fat. Yeah people want a flat tummy, but "bigger ab muscles" does not mean you will get bulging 24" Arnold biceps on your stomach.



If I hear some product is "amazing" and only costs "$19.95" I am gonna throw up.
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Comments

  • Reply 1 of 23
    [quote]For example, the internal antenna. Yeah, 20 bucks for a sticker. I bet that doesn't work.<hr></blockquote>



    A friend of a friend is a reporter for a local tv station, he does a segment every week called "Can You Believe It?" He buys crap off the internet that he sees on tv commercials/infomercials, and then tries it out. A few weeks ago he did the internal antenna, and had two identical phones on the same service, one with the "antenna," and one without. Everywhere he went, they were exactly the same. It still cut out like crazy inside big stores or in tunnels.



    [ 12-26-2001: Message edited by: poor taylor ]</p>
  • Reply 2 of 23
  • Reply 3 of 23
    sebseb Posts: 676member
    That "Tornado" thing for car intake/carbs looks kinda cool.



    The principle makes sense. Kinda expensive though.



    Whenevery I see that stuff on TV I always think, "geez why didn't I think of that".



    Whether the crap works or not, the person selling it is bound to be making a good chunk of change of selling a gimmick.



    These people even have little booths in the mall now where they sell the "as seen on TV' products that "aren't available in stores". Got the clothes steamer thing there last christmas but it was missing a part. Never got to try it out. \
  • Reply 4 of 23
    pscatespscates Posts: 5,847member
    The entertainment value on most of those things surpasses most network sitcoms.



    Some of them are like train wrecks in that you can't NOT look at them because they're so devastating, tragic and loud.







    Yes, they DO have those little production "techniques", don't they? The "bad way = B&W with a fat guy" and the "good way in blazing color with a sexy little monkey of a housewife".



    I like watching the one for Nad's hair removal system because this woman from Down Under has some SERIOUSLY fine daughters on there that help her demonstrate. This trio of black-haired, smooth-legged vixens beats the living hell out of any Drew Carey episode ever produced, I'll say that right now!



    But yeah...you KNOW this crap doesn't work. It can't. Everytime I see one of those "wear this magnetic reverse polarity baseball cap and lose up to 15 pounds a day!!!" things, I always go "motherfücker, PUT DOWN the Ding-Dongs and the pork rinds and you might find those 15 pounds go away on their own!"







    There's an entire industry out there devoted to the whole idea that "eating right and excercising" can't POSSIBLY be the only true, guaranteed way to lose weight.



    "EAT, EAT, EAT your way to a thin body! Our new weight loss formula GUARANTEES you that the more you eat, the less you'll weigh! Listen to what these satisfied customers had to say: 'I done lost 38 pounds in 3 days...I've never looked better!", 'I haven't seen my penis in 14 years, but thanks to Slim-X, I can gaze upon my manhood in a way I haven't been able to since junior high! Thanks Slim-X', 'I went from being hugely overweight and quite grotesque to only mildly obese and not nearly as frightening to small children and cats...I couldn't have done without ya, Slim-X!'



    YES, those and many others are walking success stories. BUT WAIT...THAT'S NOT ALL. Call within the next SEVEN MINUTES and you'll get the free pocket pud-puller. Regularly priced at $217, it's yours for FREE. Even if you return the Slim-X, keep the Pocket Pud-Puller as our free gift to you!"



    "Call now at 1-800-455-2222. That's 1-800-455-2222. That number again, 1-800-455-2222. Call today, operators are standing by at 1-800-455-2222. OR send check or money order to:



    Harper Bullshit Marketing, Inc.

    Box 55218

    Lake City, FL 33951



    Allow 3-41 weeks for delivery!"
  • Reply 5 of 23
    Anyone ever seen those Systemax ones? I just love watching those!



    "Not only do you get the Athlon XP, but you got the Lexmark printer and scanner! We're practically giving this stuff away folks!"
  • Reply 6 of 23
    gregggregg Posts: 261member
    [quote]Originally posted by seb:

    <strong>That "Tornado" thing for car intake/carbs looks kinda cool.



    The principle makes sense. Kinda expensive though.

    \</strong><hr></blockquote>



    I saw that on TV the other day. It is intriguing. But I asked myself, if it's such a great device, and really works, why don't all car makers employ it as a standard feature? It's not rocket science. The concept is simple, so it's no amazing technological breakthrough. But I'd still like to know if it really works, or is just hype.
  • Reply 7 of 23
    g4dudeg4dude Posts: 1,016member
    [quote]Originally posted by TigerWoods99:

    <strong>Anyone ever seen those Systemax ones? I just love watching those!



    "Not only do you get the Athlon XP, but you got the Lexmark printer and scanner! We're practically giving this stuff away folks!"</strong><hr></blockquote>



    I love those. "We shopped around and got you the best price possible. Regularly $2299 but yours today for only $1799. It's great. It will change you family's life. You are investing in your childs future. Built-in 3D GRAPHICS and 128 megs of RAM. This machine is amazing!" Then I go to dell.com and configure the same system for $1199. Those Systemax infomercials are pathetic.
  • Reply 8 of 23
    cosmonutcosmonut Posts: 4,872member
    Because I'm a Broadcasting major and know about programming techniques, the reason they do the "call in the next 7 minutes and we'll [fill in the blank)" is two-fold.



    1) If they say "call in the next x minutes," then people will be more likely to call and order. If they didn't say that, most viewers would be like "well, I'll write down the number and think about it or do it later" and they never call. Lost sales.



    2) The other is a programming strategy: if they limit the time people SHOULD call, then the companies know what time the viewers were watching and what times are more successful than others (late night, early morning, Sunday morning, etc.). Makes for better statistics.



    I'd say the worst one of those I saw was a product that looks like a bow without a string. You're supposed to shake it back and forth and get the same workout in a much faster time because it's the same number reps sped up so that your workout lasts like 2 minutes instead of an hour. Please.
  • Reply 9 of 23
    [quote]Originally posted by CosmoNut:

    <strong>



    I'd say the worst one of those I saw was a product that looks like a bow without a string. You're supposed to shake it back and forth and get the same workout in a much faster time because it's the same number reps sped up so that your workout lasts like 2 minutes instead of an hour. Please. </strong><hr></blockquote>



    Ah, the infamous BodyBlade



    Anyone ever watch Shop-At-Home? I used to when Don West was on there. That was a GREAT show...going crazy of Tiger Woods Gem Mint 10s. That was great. Of course he was fired and is now in a lawsuit over selling fake Tiger cards.



    [ 12-26-2001: Message edited by: Horned_Frog ]</p>
  • Reply 10 of 23
    Ooh another good one I just saw...the George W. Bush coin...and if you read the fine print, it is authorized by the Government of Libyeria??? :eek: :confused: <img src="graemlins/bugeye.gif" border="0" alt="[Skeptical]" />
  • Reply 11 of 23
    crusadercrusader Posts: 1,129member
    The best ?As seen on TV? ads are the 1/2 hour ?shows? late at night, where they endlessly demonstrate a product in front of a huge audience. I also love to hate the ads where they have a guy interview another guy from a firm that has had great success all do to the first company's great marketing. Oh and the electro ads were the ?Doctor? (who got his MD in cuba) guarantees results. Right
  • Reply 12 of 23
    I saw a thing on ESPN about that Tiger Woods card. Top grade those things were going for crazy amounts.
  • Reply 13 of 23
    There is a funny one where some "miracle" diet pill interviews a Dr. Robert Akins. Of course, they are hoping to capitalize on the success of the Atkins diet and hoping people will see the name and think. "yeah, my firned, co-worker, whomoever mentioned that name." Of course thir product has nothing to do with the Arkins diet, but the similar name is meant to trick Joe SixPack.
  • Reply 14 of 23
    cosmonutcosmonut Posts: 4,872member
    Whenever I see those shows, I stop to figure out the, "yes, but" question that they never bring up. For example:



    One I saw had that special tube with a paint roller on the end of it. You just load the thing up with paint, and slowly push it out through the front as you roll across the wall.



    I then thought to myself, "yes, but how do you clean it? There's no way to open it up. You'd have to run an assload of water (or even worse, terpentine) through it to get it totally clean."



    Every one of those has a "yes, but" that they never tell you about.
  • Reply 15 of 23
    We have the Food Saver and it's not bad at all. In fact it's rather good. It does just what they say it does and well too. My wife loves it.
  • Reply 16 of 23
    noahjnoahj Posts: 4,502member
    Shoot, why couldn't this thread have come along sooner. I just ordered about a week ago the AirCore cooking set. Looks really good. Heat it up and it bakes the food without having to stay on the heat. Sounds like a good way to bake stuff and save on electric bills (ours just went up 30+% :eek: ) . So anyhow I figure buy it and if I don't like it they will get it back...



    Anyone else bought those or saw the infomercial? Very cheesy, two women talking about how they have no time to get the job done as they have kids in sports and one is convincing the other how well it works. What the heck...Money back gurantee...



    [ 12-27-2001: Message edited by: NoahJ ]</p>
  • Reply 17 of 23
    [quote] Shoot, why couldn't this thread have come along sooner. I just ordered about a week ago the AirCore cooking set. Looks really good. Heat it up and it bakes the food without having to stay on the heat. Sounds like a good way to bake stuff and save on electric bills (ours just went up 30+% :eek . So anyhow I figure buy it and if I don't like it they will get it back... <hr></blockquote>

    My wife and I were watching that one the other night and were just rolling, funniest infomercial I've seen in a while. Interesting concept though.
  • Reply 18 of 23
    there's a "As Seen on TV" store at a local mall here in southern california... at the block in orange, CA. it's pretty decent size, and gets lots of walk thru traffic.



    sounds like you'd have a field day in there...
  • Reply 19 of 23
    I once bought a psychic friend....that didn't work either. When Cleo ask me for my name and credit card number I say "I don' know you tell me"...aparently she wasn't psychic enough



    Anyone seen that guy that screams about the "tiny little adds in news papers ALLLL accross the nation" that will make you millions. What I wonder is why is he trying to sell his information on how to get rich if it worked so great for him.

    By the way Ralph Nader did a report on this exoping tons of people and companies as fraud



    [ 12-29-2001: Message edited by: someoneelse ]</p>
  • Reply 20 of 23
    cosmonutcosmonut Posts: 4,872member
    [quote]Originally posted by someoneelse:

    <strong>

    By the way Ralph Nader did a report on this exoping tons of people and companies as fraud



    [ 12-29-2001: Message edited by: someoneelse ]</strong><hr></blockquote>



    Ralph Nader is a crotchety old man and I didn't vote for him for President, but he's f*ing intelligent and honest in a lot of other ways.
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