We had a saying--"What happens in the realm of the golden dragon stays in the realm of the golden dragon." I saw more guys screw around on their wives in Thailand, Singapore, Hong Kong, etc, than anywhere else. I guess the lure of cheap tail with a pretty girl was too much for a lot of guys.
--The Realm of the Golden Dragon is west of the international date line for non-salor types.
very true !
and just a small addition, trust me, this doesn't just happen in the navy hehe anywhere there is an oppertunity, it can happen...
While I'm at my ex-girlfriend's place putting 128 more megs of RAM into her Rev A Bondi Blue iMac running the latest version of Panther (woman,now I bet you're sorry I've gone ), my phone's sitting at home on the worktop. We get the RAM in, but something's not working: Disk Utility won't launch and the text in the Finder's garbled. And I can't fsck: something "can't be repaired." (Maybe I should put this post in Genius Bar too.) What to do. Something in this perfect picture just ain't working. Sorry, my love.
Fuck it, let's go back to mine to get my copy of Panther and we'll try and either boot off the CD or reinstall and zero.
She drives me back to mine, I pick up my messages and discover, finally, this girl I describe in mooning terms above has got my letter (a CD, and I am a genius at long-distance seduction, trust me) and found a way of checking her email. And what does she say? While I'm being driven back to my ex-girlfriend's, I hear (I paraphrase) - 'When are you coming back? Are you coming back to where we were? Or can you come to the city where I live?' Two messages, actually. Some other stuff that makes me laugh. Oh - and the last thing she says is "Miss you."
Well blow me down thrice.
And we can't use the CD at my ex's because it's a DVD and her iMac doesn't know what to make of it.
I swear on the eternal souls, if such things exist, of my parents and my brothers that this is a true and accurate record of the events that occurred earlier tonight.
Oh- now I have to phone her. Help.
in all seriousness I have no idea what the hell you are trying to say. I read it twice to be sure... and feel like I just read the middle of a revision A sitcom script written by someone who has laid off their ADD prescription for too long. The only thing I got from that story aside from a headache was the impression that your exgirlfriend really needs a new Mac. Hope I dont offend you with this but I am really confused as to how this pertains to the topic.
People cheat because they put themselves in compromising situations. Generally they feel alienated, bored, uninterested, unappreciated (or any other excuse to cheat) and feel excited when they are given anything other than the did-you-cook-anything-for-dinner-look. We are so much more primal by nature than people care to admit. It feels good to have someone make advances towards you, but giving in amounts to either weakness or a lack of serious commitment to your spouse. It sucks and whats more so is that carma is a mother F--ker
in all seriousness I have no idea what the hell you are trying to say. I read it twice to be sure... and feel like I just read the middle of a revision A sitcom script written by someone who has laid off their ADD prescription for too long. The only thing I got from that story aside from a headache was the impression that your exgirlfriend really needs a new Mac. Hope I dont offend you with this but I am really confused as to how this pertains to the topic.
It's to do with a recent near brush with infidelity described a couple of posts above the one you quote. In this case, fidelity was a mistake because I nearly lost something that may very well be pretty cool. To conclude, all's well that ends well, since I'm now single and on Tuesday I'm off to see the girl I didn't sleep with.
Yes it derails the thread, yes it's likely that no-one's interested but me, and no I ain't sorry: sharing unlikely events in your personal life with a bunch of complete strangers on the internet turns out to be pretty cool way of getting your head round the weirdest shit.
It's to do with a recent near brush with infidelity described a couple of posts above the one you quote. In this case, fidelity was a mistake because I nearly lost something that may very well be pretty cool. To conclude, all's well that ends well, since I'm now single and on Tuesday I'm off to see the girl I didn't sleep with.
Yes it derails the thread, yes it's likely that no-one's interested but me, and no I ain't sorry: sharing unlikely events in your personal life with a bunch of complete strangers on the internet turns out to be pretty cool way of getting your head round the weirdest shit.
Sorry about your headache though.
Incidentally, the iMac's working a treat.
what can I say your reply made me smile ....even though I still dont understand what you're talking about or how it relates to this thread. Smiles I'll take
People cheat because they put themselves in compromising situations. Generally they feel alienated, bored, uninterested, unappreciated (or any other excuse to cheat) and feel excited when they are given anything other than the did-you-cook-anything-for-dinner-look. We are so much more primal by nature than people care to admit. It feels good to have someone make advances towards you, but giving in amounts to either weakness or a lack of serious commitment to your spouse. It sucks and whats more so is that carma is a mother F--ker
Damn: it just struck me that my display of moral fibre and belief in fidelity has has worked massively to my advantage.
Why wouldn't it? Don't you think that the idea that you wouldn't cheat on a girlfriend- even one you were on the outs with- when faced with an incredibly desireable, sexy, wonderful woman, simply because it was the right thing to do might strike her as a major plus? Hell, I'd want to date you.
I'll never understand people who tell me that fidelity is soooo freaking hard. Cheating is hard. Lying is hard. Hurting someone you supposedly love is hard.
Wow, maybe I'm just way more laid back, but a kiss? I mean didn't you ever get drunk in a bar and kiss a girl for no good reason? Infidelity to me is like a lot of things. It comes in many different flavors and not all are the same or deserve the same response. It's way too complex with too many different scenarios to have one feeling on the subject.
I actually think the most damaging thing with cheating is the lying. The most important things in a relationship are honesty and trust, so if you're lying all the time you're fucking with the foundation. If people were more honest with each other and secure in themselves they wouldn't get themselves in half the cheating situations anyway. That said I don't understand the obsession with the physical aspect of infidelity. I mean what's a kiss? What's fooling around? It's not love it's a physical act that we're programmed to perform.
trick fall / Tonton, I agree. I should have said "a kiss can be bad enough": it depends on the circumstances, the intentions, the significance of the person being kissed. A drunken snog in a bar? Forgivable, of course. Snog your ex-boy/girlfriend while your partner's away? Different.
Hassan, I really hope it all works out for you, the signs are very good judging by your earlier posts. Maybe by you being the gentleman regarding fidelity life has worked some kind of voodoo love magic on all concerned. Here's one internet stranger wishing you all the best, Alex.
As one who was infidelious (a telling of a girl that I liked her), a long make out session with the girl, and an almost sleeping with the girl, which led to a break with my girlfirend and the ultimate and emotionally costly falling out with her (understandably), and the resulting short-lived and painfully unfulfilling relationship with the girl, I can say honestly and without hesitation that the utterance of the shared liking of the girl was were the problems began on that side of things. Without having shared those words I probably could have ignored her existence and continued on lusting but not touching. The shared words however opened a door which should not have been opened and let me stray simultaneously into wanting to cheat and stupidly ignoring my girlfriend. Mind you this took less than a week.
It is never worth it. No matter how good things look on the other side, make the break with you sig-other and then find a relationship... like hassan...
I think this is self-induced in most cases, for example if you truely care about the person you should make it a point to try and do things outside of your normal routine. I think stagnancy in relationships is often a result of too much routine. Its the same reason so many people hate their jobs....its not that the job is necessarily a bad job, it just gets boring and they just get tired of dealing with the same ole' shit.
This of course is not the only reason that infidelity occurs, but I feel it is one of the two most common reasons. The second major reason is simply a lack of comitment and self-control. Some people just don't care all that much, which is very unfortunate because they often devistate their partner.
I cheated on an ex-fiance years ago. Our relationship was deteriorating and she was a very dispassionate, angry, and hurtful woman. I cheated because I just wanted to feel something good for a change. Physical pleasure and the feeling that someone cared. The woman I cheated with was in a similar position, she was married and her husband was pretty sorry as well. I just remember both of us clutching each other for dear life afterward, probably being afraid to go back to our SO's.
Eventually I wised up and dumped her.
I'm married now, and as we have great communication, do fun things together, have great sex on a regular basis, so there is no reason to cheat. My wife is my best friend.
Realistically though, as stupid as my ex was, it wasn't good at all to cheat on her. Realistically I should have dumped her and moved on sooner. So anyone who reads this and is thinking of cheating I recommend you assess your relationship and either work it out or dump'em and move on
some people learn about cheating, some dont. i was too long time with a guy who cheated. end of story, i don't like talking about ex's. anyway, he didnt learn.
having the opportunity does not make the cheat. so as long as i love someone, i can be no matter where and surrounded by whom, nothing will happen.
Comments
Originally posted by faust9
We had a saying--"What happens in the realm of the golden dragon stays in the realm of the golden dragon." I saw more guys screw around on their wives in Thailand, Singapore, Hong Kong, etc, than anywhere else. I guess the lure of cheap tail with a pretty girl was too much for a lot of guys.
--The Realm of the Golden Dragon is west of the international date line for non-salor types.
very true !
and just a small addition, trust me, this doesn't just happen in the navy hehe anywhere there is an oppertunity, it can happen...
Originally posted by Hassan i Sabbah
Holy shit. We're going to have a happy ending.
So. Check this out. This is perfect.
While I'm at my ex-girlfriend's place putting 128 more megs of RAM into her Rev A Bondi Blue iMac running the latest version of Panther (woman,now I bet you're sorry I've gone
Fuck it, let's go back to mine to get my copy of Panther and we'll try and either boot off the CD or reinstall and zero.
She drives me back to mine, I pick up my messages and discover, finally, this girl I describe in mooning terms above has got my letter (a CD, and I am a genius at long-distance seduction, trust me) and found a way of checking her email. And what does she say? While I'm being driven back to my ex-girlfriend's, I hear (I paraphrase) - 'When are you coming back? Are you coming back to where we were? Or can you come to the city where I live?' Two messages, actually. Some other stuff that makes me laugh. Oh - and the last thing she says is "Miss you."
Well blow me down thrice.
And we can't use the CD at my ex's because it's a DVD and her iMac doesn't know what to make of it.
I swear on the eternal souls, if such things exist, of my parents and my brothers that this is a true and accurate record of the events that occurred earlier tonight.
Oh- now I have to phone her. Help.
in all seriousness I have no idea what the hell you are trying to say. I read it twice to be sure... and feel like I just read the middle of a revision A sitcom script written by someone who has laid off their ADD prescription for too long. The only thing I got from that story aside from a headache was the impression that your exgirlfriend really needs a new Mac. Hope I dont offend you with this but I am really confused as to how this pertains to the topic.
Originally posted by Playmaker
in all seriousness I have no idea what the hell you are trying to say. I read it twice to be sure... and feel like I just read the middle of a revision A sitcom script written by someone who has laid off their ADD prescription for too long. The only thing I got from that story aside from a headache was the impression that your exgirlfriend really needs a new Mac. Hope I dont offend you with this but I am really confused as to how this pertains to the topic.
It's to do with a recent near brush with infidelity described a couple of posts above the one you quote. In this case, fidelity was a mistake because I nearly lost something that may very well be pretty cool. To conclude, all's well that ends well, since I'm now single and on Tuesday I'm off to see the girl I didn't sleep with.
Yes it derails the thread, yes it's likely that no-one's interested but me, and no I ain't sorry: sharing unlikely events in your personal life with a bunch of complete strangers on the internet turns out to be pretty cool way of getting your head round the weirdest shit.
Sorry about your headache though.
Incidentally, the iMac's working a treat.
Holy shit. We're going to have a happy ending.
Hooray!
Incidentally, the iMac's working a treat.
Hooray!
Two happy endings for the price of one.
Originally posted by Hassan i Sabbah
Yes it derails the thread, yes it's likely that no-one's interested but me...
That couldn't be further from the truth.
Keep us posted on how things go in the coming weeks. Personally, I'm thrilled for you.
Originally posted by Hassan i Sabbah
It's to do with a recent near brush with infidelity described a couple of posts above the one you quote. In this case, fidelity was a mistake because I nearly lost something that may very well be pretty cool. To conclude, all's well that ends well, since I'm now single and on Tuesday I'm off to see the girl I didn't sleep with.
Yes it derails the thread, yes it's likely that no-one's interested but me, and no I ain't sorry: sharing unlikely events in your personal life with a bunch of complete strangers on the internet turns out to be pretty cool way of getting your head round the weirdest shit.
Sorry about your headache though.
Incidentally, the iMac's working a treat.
what can I say your reply made me smile
Originally posted by Playmaker
People cheat because they put themselves in compromising situations. Generally they feel alienated, bored, uninterested, unappreciated (or any other excuse to cheat) and feel excited when they are given anything other than the did-you-cook-anything-for-dinner-look. We are so much more primal by nature than people care to admit. It feels good to have someone make advances towards you, but giving in amounts to either weakness or a lack of serious commitment to your spouse. It sucks and whats more so is that carma is a mother F--ker
Sure but why to people get that way?
Originally posted by Hassan i Sabbah
Damn: it just struck me that my display of moral fibre and belief in fidelity has has worked massively to my advantage.
Why wouldn't it? Don't you think that the idea that you wouldn't cheat on a girlfriend- even one you were on the outs with- when faced with an incredibly desireable, sexy, wonderful woman, simply because it was the right thing to do might strike her as a major plus? Hell, I'd want to date you.
I'll never understand people who tell me that fidelity is soooo freaking hard. Cheating is hard. Lying is hard. Hurting someone you supposedly love is hard.
A kiss is bad enough.
Wow, maybe I'm just way more laid back, but a kiss? I mean didn't you ever get drunk in a bar and kiss a girl for no good reason? Infidelity to me is like a lot of things. It comes in many different flavors and not all are the same or deserve the same response. It's way too complex with too many different scenarios to have one feeling on the subject.
I actually think the most damaging thing with cheating is the lying. The most important things in a relationship are honesty and trust, so if you're lying all the time you're fucking with the foundation. If people were more honest with each other and secure in themselves they wouldn't get themselves in half the cheating situations anyway. That said I don't understand the obsession with the physical aspect of infidelity. I mean what's a kiss? What's fooling around? It's not love it's a physical act that we're programmed to perform.
It is never worth it. No matter how good things look on the other side, make the break with you sig-other and then find a relationship... like hassan...
(billy bob sky)
Originally posted by Scott
Sure but why to people get that way?
I think this is self-induced in most cases, for example if you truely care about the person you should make it a point to try and do things outside of your normal routine. I think stagnancy in relationships is often a result of too much routine. Its the same reason so many people hate their jobs....its not that the job is necessarily a bad job, it just gets boring and they just get tired of dealing with the same ole' shit.
This of course is not the only reason that infidelity occurs, but I feel it is one of the two most common reasons. The second major reason is simply a lack of comitment and self-control. Some people just don't care all that much, which is very unfortunate because they often devistate their partner.
Eventually I wised up and dumped her.
I'm married now, and as we have great communication, do fun things together, have great sex on a regular basis, so there is no reason to cheat. My wife is my best friend.
Realistically though, as stupid as my ex was, it wasn't good at all to cheat on her. Realistically I should have dumped her and moved on sooner. So anyone who reads this and is thinking of cheating I recommend you assess your relationship and either work it out or dump'em and move on
having the opportunity does not make the cheat. so as long as i love someone, i can be no matter where and surrounded by whom, nothing will happen.