New charges against Lance Armstrong

steve666steve666
Posted:
in AppleOutsider edited January 2014
New charges against Lance Armstrong



PARIS, France -- Lance Armstrong's record setting seventh Tour de France victory, along with his entire Tour de France legacy, may be tarnished by what could turn out to be one of the greatest sports scandals of all time.



Armstrong is being quizzed by French police after three banned substances were found in his South France hotel room while on vacation after winning the 2005 Tour de France.

The three substances found were toothpaste, deodorant, and soap, which have been banned by French authorities for over 75 years.



Armstrong's girlfriend and American rocker Sheryl Crowe is quoted as saying "we use them every day in America, so we naturally thought they'd be ok throughout Europe."



Along with these three banned substances, French authorities also found several other interesting items on Armstrong that they have never seen before, including a backbone and one testicle.
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Comments

  • Reply 1 of 52
    andersanders Posts: 6,523member
    How is it that everybody who thinks other nationalities are nationalists and don´t like americans have nationalists tendencies and don´t like other nationalities?
  • Reply 2 of 52
    durin oakenskindurin oakenskin Posts: 202member
    If this thread was meant to be funny, it didn't work. It's just disgusting.
  • Reply 3 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Oh, come on! How can you read that and not laugh?

    You guys need to get out more.
  • Reply 4 of 52
    durin oakenskindurin oakenskin Posts: 202member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    Oh, come on! How can you read that and not laugh?



    Maybe because it's not funny? Because there is a big possibility that Armstrong really cheated? Because of Freedom Fries? Because the French are always to blame for everything? Because of the outcome of every political thread in this forum? Because the superiority of the Americans demonstrated by certain members in this forum? Because we might know France better than you? Because...
  • Reply 5 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by durin oakenskin

    Maybe because it's not funny? Because there is a big possibility that Armstrong really cheated? Because of Freedom Fries? Because the French are always to blame for everything? Because of the outcome of every political thread in this forum? Because the superiority of the Americans demonstrated by certain members in this forum? Because we might know France better than you? Because...



    Don't get your panties in a bunch, its called a joke.

    Americans have a sense of humor, I guess that's another form of superiority.
  • Reply 6 of 52
    durin oakenskindurin oakenskin Posts: 202member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    Don't get your panties in a bunch, its called a joke.

    Americans have a sense of humor, I guess that's another form of superiority.



    Ah, I see. Didn't know that.
  • Reply 7 of 52
    audiopollutionaudiopollution Posts: 3,226member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    Americans have a sense of humor, I guess that's another form of superiority.



    That's the only funny thing that you've posted in this thread.



    Pathetic.
  • Reply 8 of 52
    bronxitebronxite Posts: 104member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    Oh, come on! How can you read that and not laugh?

    You guys need to get out more.



    this board is populated by a bunch of dick in ass liberals and europeans. of course they aren't going to have a sense of humor and of course they are going to jump to the conclusion that Lance doped and jump all over any questionable evidence suggesting he was
  • Reply 9 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by audiopollution

    That's the only funny thing that you've posted in this thread.



    Pathetic.



    What's pathetic? That you can't take a joke?

    Buy a life for Christmas
  • Reply 10 of 52
    audiopollutionaudiopollution Posts: 3,226member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Bronxite

    this board is populated by a bunch of dick in ass liberals and europeans. of course they aren't going to have a sense of humor and of course they are going to jump to the conclusion that Lance doped and jump all over any questionable evidence suggesting he was



    Brilliant! I'm utterly stunned. You've set a new bar. We'll be convening a special committee in the secret 'libruls only' section of the forum in order to come up with a response. That is, if we can figure out that ass & dick thing you seem so knowledgable of.



    Thanks for furthering your countries decline.



    Now quick! I hear your mom calling.
  • Reply 11 of 52
    audiopollutionaudiopollution Posts: 3,226member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    What's pathetic? That you can't take a joke?

    Buy a life for Christmas



    What's pathetic is that you're trumpeting 'sarcasm' as an indicator of superiority.



    There's a special section of hell in which you have to listen to sarcasm and puns for eternity.
  • Reply 12 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by Bronxite

    this board is populated by a bunch of dick in ass liberals and europeans. of course they aren't going to have a sense of humor and of course they are going to jump to the conclusion that Lance doped and jump all over any questionable evidence suggesting he was



    It really has been taken over by a Left-Wing Group who are rabidly Anti-American and Anti-Israeli and who have no sense of humor at all.
  • Reply 13 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by audiopollution

    What's pathetic is that you're trumpeting 'sarcasm' as an indicator of superiority.



    There's a special section of hell in which you have to listen to sarcasm and puns for eternity.



    What is your major malfunction, private!?

    It was humor, they don't have sarcastic humor in Europe?

    Did that dissapear along with all kind of common sense?
  • Reply 14 of 52
    audiopollutionaudiopollution Posts: 3,226member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    What is your major malfunction, private!?

    It was humor, they don't have sarcastic humor in Europe?

    Did that dissapear along with all kind of common sense?



    My point is that sarcasm, in competition with pun, has claimed the title of 'lowest form of humour'. That joke scores a 3 on the superiority scale.
  • Reply 15 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by audiopollution

    My point is that sarcasm, in competition with pun, has claimed the title of 'lowest form of humour'. That joke scores a 3 on the superiority scale.



    Thats because you have no sense of humor
  • Reply 16 of 52
    audiopollutionaudiopollution Posts: 3,226member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by steve666

    Thats because you have no sense of humor



    I think the problem is that I speak English, whereas you speak American.



    The humour is getting lost in translation, as I'm sure my expectations aren't too high.



  • Reply 17 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by audiopollution

    I think the problem is that I speak English, whereas you speak American.



    The humour is getting lost in translation, as I'm sure my expectations aren't too high.







    And who has the superiority complex?
  • Reply 18 of 52
    addaboxaddabox Posts: 12,665member
    Jesus.



    Could we please close this thread?
  • Reply 19 of 52
    steve666steve666 Posts: 2,600member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by addabox

    Jesus.



    Could we please close this thread?



    I start a thread with a very funny joke and now there's a request to close it already?



    What is the matter with you people?
  • Reply 20 of 52
    audiopollutionaudiopollution Posts: 3,226member
    Quote:

    Originally posted by addabox

    Jesus.



    Could we please close this thread?



    Nah. The longer the thread gets, the funnier it becomes. A 'lock' would be the obvious punchline.
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