Vile Britannia! (What Hollywood thinks of us limeys)
Not the first article on this topic I've seen in a Brit newspaper, but easily the funniest! 
Ho ho ho!
Ho ho ho! Ho ho ho!
Comments
Originally posted by The Blue Meanie
Not the first article on this topic I've seen in a Brit newspaper, but easily the funniest!
Limmies make such good baddies ( and pervy old butlers )....they've all got the smarmiest accents...and have that arrogant " old boys " look down pat..
They make the devil look sauve...and all the more deadlier..
But it's just a phase...it will pass...& eventually you'll be ignored like the rest of the world..
I want the baddies of the future to come from Belgium...
der Kopf where are you ? ...
Ps you've forget Bond ?
Home James..................brrrrrrrrmmmmmm.....
Originally posted by aquafire
Ps you've forget Bond ?
Although played in the films by an englishman, irishman, welshman, scot and australian, Bond the character was half scots, half swiss.
This is an important distinction as the article makes a good stab at pretending to be about the british but it is obviously referring to the english throughout and finally succumbs and just uses english in the last two paragraphs.
This follows the standard english practice of only including other parts of britain when they can share some of the glory (e.g. scottish athletes are only refered to as british if they win medals) or deflect some of the blame (e.g. with reference to this article, when was the last time you saw someone play a Nazi sounding like Sir Mac O' The Isles?).
I don't want to sound like I've a chip on my shoulder (especially as I'm part-english myself) but this double-standard bugs me more than if they just got it plain wrong--like the americans.
Or: it's Hollywood. Who cares?
I know I don't. Not anymore than I care about British tabloid headlines.
The article forgot to mention the rewriting of history with Americans doing things those Brits did ... what was that (awful) Val Kilmer film with 'Mericans invading a sub to get the Enigma machine? Originally done by the Brits?
Originally posted by segovius
Exactly.
But that Guardian article is actually a crock of BS. The fact is that the only reason that Brit actors 'concorde it over the pond' is because their government is too stupid and short sighted to fund the arts.
Basically to them, if it ain't 'conservative' (small c - no flames) business then it won't make money so it don't get funded. Meanwhile Hollywood (and Bollywood) coins it in while the Brits complain. Lame.
All they can do is witter on about 'astounding Brit successes' like the Full Monty which would never have got made without Hollywood cash but they haven't got what it takes to actually fund a film industry themselves so they just complain about being cast as villains (that's nothing to what would happen if I was casting director) and whinge about it while everyone else parties on.
Sad
Segovius, old bean, I don't know if you noticed but Hollywood has the WORLD, not just the Brits, by the balls.
Do you think that the US government's funding of Hollywood is what makes it successful? I'm certain you don't ... so why should UK funding make that country's film industry a success?
This 'anyone who complains about the way the US treats them must be jealous' crap is getting sooooooooo boring.
I mean, look at Microsoft. Anyone who slags them off (them being so successful 'n rich and all) must be jealous of their market dominance and excellent business skills, right?
Originally posted by Harald
Naaaaa.
The article forgot to mention the rewriting of history with Americans doing things those Brits did ... what was that (awful) Val Kilmer film with 'Mericans invading a sub to get the Enigma machine? Originally done by the Brits?
I'm glad you commented on this. The worse part about that movie was the Americans actually did capture a sub and take an Enigma machine. They weren't the first to do it, though, so had the producer just change the name of the movie to reflect the U-boat that the Americans captured everything could've been more accurate.
I saw part of that movie and watched the interview by the producer at the end of the DVD. The funny/irritating part of that interview was he was talking about the British, had a Union Jack in the background, but still casted Americans to play the role of the British. Why couldn't he have just hired British actors and make it the British who captured the machine? Or, why couldn't he have just changed the name of the movie to reflect one of the subs the Americans captured and avoid all this controversy? Hollywood stupidity! It's things like that why I don't go watch movies really anymore.
Originally posted by Harald
Segovius, old bean, I don't know if you noticed but Hollywood has the WORLD, not just the Brits, by the balls.
Never mind the Bollocks..there is always Bollywood...
Originally posted by X X
I'm glad you commented on this. The worse part about that movie was the Americans actually did capture a sub and take an Enigma machine. They weren't the first to do it, though, so had the producer just change the name of the movie to reflect the U-boat that the Americans captured everything could've been more accurate.
I saw part of that movie and watched the interview by the producer at the end of the DVD. The funny/irritating part of that interview was he was talking about the British, had a Union Jack in the background, but still casted Americans to play the role of the British. Why couldn't he have just hired British actors and make it the British who captured the machine? Or, why couldn't he have just changed the name of the movie to reflect one of the subs the Americans captured and avoid all this controversy? Hollywood stupidity! It's things like that why I don't go watch movies really anymore.
Ah yes, that was 'U571' wasn't it? Quietly outrageous. Caused quite a stink in the UK even before it was released. As I understand it though, X X, it wasn't Americans playing Brits in that film, it was Americans playing Americans pretending to have done something actually done by the British. Apparently the director had to be shamed by veterans' organisations into including an acknowledgement in the closing credits that it was actually the Royal Navy who captured the first Enigma machine.
Originally posted by Moogs
You act as if Hollywood is capable of constructing a meaningful opinion.
Or: it's Hollywood. Who cares?
Know what you're saying there, Moogs - but a big chunk of the world queues round the block for the Hollywood dream factory. How many of those millions take an interest in historical fact? Not many. So it
does matter, on some level.
Maybe we should make a film about how it was actually a crack British commando unit who won the Battle of Gettysburg...
And yes, Britain and Ireland have some stunning places, Salisbury Plain and Stonehenge are pretty scary for that feeling of being in an ancient landscape too. Peace and love, Alex.
I must admit when it comes tae atavistic stereotyping I find ye cannae whack the COMMANDO comic books (a purely British phenomenon I expect). In the winter months when the snaw's up tae the lintels and I'm doon tae my last ship's biscuit I oft climb up tae the attic and read my auld stash. The dialogue goes something like this...
"Achtung Das Englander!" RATATATATATAT!!!! BOOM!
"Take this Fritz!" RATATATATATATA RATATATATATA! WHOOSH! BANG!
I suspect this isnae entirely in the new spirit o' entente cordiale correctness, but they're still in print and a bluidy fine read too on a winter's nicht.
All hail Sir Mac!!
Everyone knows that native 'mericans were not peaceful, ecologically balanced types, but raging lunatics - just itchin' to pounce on an unsuspecting wagon-train full of innocent settlers with their wives and young-un! They were cannibals. That's why they were always after the white meat, if you know what I'm sayin.
Why, if whitey hadn't done the righteous thing and slaughtered those bastards until their ass 'n' feathers were hanging over the Pacific, we might not have this glorious country we have today! The United States might be nothing more than a canker sore of a nation. Just imagine: New Jersey might be our capitol! Canada might extend down all the way to Kentucky in the east and Arizona in the west. Hell, Mexico might be twice as big. No Texas!
Sure, our friend Rotto might approve of this, but what about the rest of us. Well, at least professional hockey would be a more viable sport in that instance. Reasonable salary caps and all....
Did I mention.... Hollywood sucks festering rhino testicles?
Cross-over here with the 'your society is racist' thread ... Euro / US WAS racist as evinced by the above.
So when did it stop, I ask those who say our societies are not racist?
(maybe don't reply to this here!)
Yes, Hollywood DOES matter. Maybe not to many (but not all) Americans but the 'dream factory' does position America in the mind of 'mericans as the supreme do-er of all good, and makes it look like Babylon to those who want to see it as Babylon.
Originally posted by aquafire
Limmies make such good baddies ( and pervy old butlers )....they've all got the smarmiest accents...and have that arrogant " old boys " look down pat..
They make the devil look sauve...and all the more deadlier..
But it's just a phase...it will pass...& eventually you'll be ignored like the rest of the world..
I want the baddies of the future to come from Belgium...
der Kopf where are you ? ...
Ps you've forget Bond ?
Home James..................brrrrrrrrmmmmmm.....
Bond is produced by a British company