Being someone looking in from the outside, Tiger, my guess is that you are getting jerked around.
[quote] I wanted to visit her about a month ago but she won't let me.
Yeah, you see we hadn't talked for aquite a while (almost a month)<hr></blockquote>
If you have your timeline right...then this doesn't make sense:
[quote]she was in the hospital for a very long time, even in a coma for some of the time. She can't get on the computer yet because she fractured both of her arms so she wouldn't be able to type.<hr></blockquote>
I would assume, based on experience of a kid getting hit by a car and being in a coma..that she was in the hospital far longer than a month, if she was in one.
I really think this girl is just pulling your strings...if someone was to do that to me, I would dump them.
[quote]and she's done this before to me where she hasn't come on or whatever so we could talk<hr></blockquote>
There you go, that's your answer. She's stringing you along and made up this story of being in a coma and in the hospital. If I'm wrong, then so be it and I'll apologize...but until you prove that she actually was, then I'll be under the assumption that she is psycho.
I'll dig up something for you to read...based on personal experience..about something along this line...
<strong>I agree with you...but come on man. Nobody is making up stories about being in a coma or anything....</strong><hr></blockquote>
You're dealing with a woman man. Get with the program.
The others have pointed it out to me. Sounds like she's giving you the brush off. I hope not, I hope she did get hit by a car and can't type. No wait I mean not that. Just that ... well that didn't come out right. Okay kidding aside it does seem a bit odd.
One way or the other you'll have to get something of the full story from her. I've been jerk around by girls too. They make up all kinds of stuff. The good thing is that they grow out of it.
Reason for not calling her? She told me not to.</strong><hr></blockquote>
You care about her, right? Call her and tell her even though she told you not to call you were worried about her so you called. If she doesn't like it she's not worth it.
Tiger (may I call you Tiger?), it's been my experience (not 100%, but enough to know) that people - men AND women - in relationships are capable of the most devious, underhanded, full-of-shit headgames and treachery ever to be known.
Of course, the opposite holds true as well. In many cases.
But it hurts to get yanked and played with (figuritively, of course...literally, it's kinda fun...heehee).
But seriously. It's kinda sad, but I've learned to "sleep with one eye open" regarding certain people, certain types of people, certain relationships, etc.
I take NOTHING for granted.
I've had horrible, horrible lies and things told directly to my face.
Do what you feel you must.
But also, step back and analyze everything with a more detached, objective eye. Protect yourself. Don't let yourself be used or messed with.
No woman (or guy, depending on your gender or preference) is worth the heartache, agony, anger, sleeplessness, sick-stomach-feeling, etc. that comes with being played, lied-to, etc.
TONS of fish in the sea. And most of them are probably really good. It just so happens the bad ones are really, really bad and will **** with your heart and mind if given half a chance.
Reading through this thread, some of this stuff just sounds really suspect and shaky at best, you know?
Tiger, didn't you have a long thread a while back about someone messing with your AOL IM account and your phone or something?
I agree with cosmonut and pscates. In fact, if you're on the level here, it sounds to me like you've gotten yourself tangled up with a real live psychopath! I highly recommend this book: <a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1572304510/qid=918606296/sr=1-3/102-2005748-1784951" target="_blank">Without Conscience</a>. It's an eye-opener. And I bet nails the head on whoever it is that's fücking with you (sounds to me like it's your "girlfriend").
Totally understand what you're saying. I have stepped up and told her that I would not stand for anything anymore, and right now we are broken up (although titles dont matter, we're still practically together and I still plan on it). I've even taken the route where I feel that maybe IF I do what everyone says and go get one of those fishes in the sea while I wait for her, she'll realize something. I'm by no means full of myself or conceited, its the exact opposite, but nobody else has been the guy that I have been all this time for her. And nobody else has been as good to me as she has. Reality is that I dont get some of the stuff she puts me through, but I do understand her to some etent. But is it really fair to make me wait so long to be with her again?
Yes, there are many complications to our relationship. But being that she is a grown woman she can make her own decisions. It's like she has to impress her dad or something. SHe does things for him. I'm not that quote on quote perfect rich good at sports good looking guy he wants. Those guys were all jackasses to her. Is it her parents? If so, f*ck them if you seriously love me and want to be with me.
I've heard it all the time that "I want to be with you but now just isn't the right time". I don't put anything on her that a normal guy wouldn't expect from his girl. In fact I'm probably more understanding and put up with a lot more than most would. I'd assume it's because of sh*t I've dealt with both now and in the past. Decide to lose her, and I've lost everything.
She always has an excuse everytime I want to come visit her or want her to visit. I'm being put 3rd or 4th or 5th. It's like....I put her first and foremost, so I expect the same from her. I can't be behind anything. You guys all see it my way. She acts like NOBODY would see it my way. Like what she does is right, what I do is wrong. Wanting to be with her right now is wrong. No.
I went to orientation btw a little over a week ago. Nice girls. I even talked to one, no flirting nothing going on....just basically talk. I even felt guilty for that. I avoid it for Stefanie. If this continues though....you can believe that I'm going to make it clear she's losing out. I can't do it any longer.
Maybe if I was with one of those girls, she'd realize and come back. But why do that? There are plenty of fish in the sea. I've heard that....but nobody knows exactly the situation and how close I am with Stefanie. I love her, and I'll marry her. I can't think any other way.
This is getting too long and I've already said more than I should......
Comments
<strong>I e-mailed her cousin and she still hasn't replied. Gee, I guess this is what I get.</strong><hr></blockquote>
That really is ****ed up. Something definately isn't right...
[quote] I wanted to visit her about a month ago but she won't let me.
Yeah, you see we hadn't talked for aquite a while (almost a month)<hr></blockquote>
If you have your timeline right...then this doesn't make sense:
[quote]she was in the hospital for a very long time, even in a coma for some of the time. She can't get on the computer yet because she fractured both of her arms so she wouldn't be able to type.<hr></blockquote>
I would assume, based on experience of a kid getting hit by a car and being in a coma..that she was in the hospital far longer than a month, if she was in one.
I really think this girl is just pulling your strings...if someone was to do that to me, I would dump them.
[quote]and she's done this before to me where she hasn't come on or whatever so we could talk<hr></blockquote>
There you go, that's your answer. She's stringing you along and made up this story of being in a coma and in the hospital. If I'm wrong, then so be it and I'll apologize...but until you prove that she actually was, then I'll be under the assumption that she is psycho.
I'll dig up something for you to read...based on personal experience..about something along this line...
<strong>
Hmmm, perhaps, but i have seen so much idiotics comportements in my life, that i would not bet my hand on this .
And there is necessary a phone in her room, so there is no reason why you could not call her.</strong><hr></blockquote>
<strong>I agree with you...but come on man. Nobody is making up stories about being in a coma or anything....</strong><hr></blockquote>
You're dealing with a woman man. Get with the program.
The others have pointed it out to me. Sounds like she's giving you the brush off. I hope not, I hope she did get hit by a car and can't type. No wait I mean not that. Just that ... well that didn't come out right.
One way or the other you'll have to get something of the full story from her. I've been jerk around by girls too. They make up all kinds of stuff. The good thing is that they grow out of it.
Good luck. I have to drive back to Ann Arbor now.
<strong>I agree with you...but come on man. Nobody is making up stories about being in a coma or anything....</strong><hr></blockquote>
You never know...
I agree with you...but come on man. Nobody is making up stories about being in a coma or anything....<hr></blockquote>
And you know this how?
Oh yeah...an email
[quote]Just got that. It's from her cousin<hr></blockquote>
Have you met this "cousin"? It's interesting that they don't have your phone number...so impersonal to send an email.
So why don't you call her??
If it was me and I couldn't drop everything right then, I would at least call.
Come on, don't tell me you don't have a little bit of doubt in you?
How should I call when she has casts on both her arms? If she can't type on a computer she's not gonna be able to talk on a phone.
They do have my phone number. Her cousin lives like down the street from her or something and yeah.
How should I call when she has casts on both her arms? If she can't type on a computer she's not gonna be able to talk on a phone.<hr></blockquote>
You never did answer me...did you meet this cousin? And have you actually met this girl you call your GF?
someone can dial for her and she can put the phone between shoulder and head, or they could hold it for her while she says a quick hello...
And I asked you why YOU don't call her?
[ 07-28-2002: Message edited by: TOOL ]</p>
Reason for not calling her? She told me not to.
Reason for not calling her? She told me not to.<hr></blockquote>
And why not? If you 2 were bf/gf, I would imagine that you could basically call anytime.
And especially now that she "was in a coma" and all that BS...
<strong>Yes to all your questions.
Reason for not calling her? She told me not to.</strong><hr></blockquote>
You care about her, right? Call her and tell her even though she told you not to call you were worried about her so you called. If she doesn't like it she's not worth it.
I dont get her and Im not going to stand the things she does, but Im not going to expect something like that to be "made up"
I'll call her tomorrow and see.
Of course, the opposite holds true as well. In many cases.
But it hurts to get yanked and played with (figuritively, of course...literally, it's kinda fun...heehee).
But seriously. It's kinda sad, but I've learned to "sleep with one eye open" regarding certain people, certain types of people, certain relationships, etc.
I take NOTHING for granted.
I've had horrible, horrible lies and things told directly to my face.
Do what you feel you must.
But also, step back and analyze everything with a more detached, objective eye. Protect yourself. Don't let yourself be used or messed with.
No woman (or guy, depending on your gender or preference) is worth the heartache, agony, anger, sleeplessness, sick-stomach-feeling, etc. that comes with being played, lied-to, etc.
TONS of fish in the sea. And most of them are probably really good. It just so happens the bad ones are really, really bad and will **** with your heart and mind if given half a chance.
Reading through this thread, some of this stuff just sounds really suspect and shaky at best, you know?
I agree with cosmonut and pscates. In fact, if you're on the level here, it sounds to me like you've gotten yourself tangled up with a real live psychopath! I highly recommend this book: <a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1572304510/qid=918606296/sr=1-3/102-2005748-1784951" target="_blank">Without Conscience</a>. It's an eye-opener. And I bet nails the head on whoever it is that's fücking with you (sounds to me like it's your "girlfriend").
Yes, there are many complications to our relationship. But being that she is a grown woman she can make her own decisions. It's like she has to impress her dad or something. SHe does things for him. I'm not that quote on quote perfect rich good at sports good looking guy he wants. Those guys were all jackasses to her. Is it her parents? If so, f*ck them if you seriously love me and want to be with me.
I've heard it all the time that "I want to be with you but now just isn't the right time". I don't put anything on her that a normal guy wouldn't expect from his girl. In fact I'm probably more understanding and put up with a lot more than most would. I'd assume it's because of sh*t I've dealt with both now and in the past. Decide to lose her, and I've lost everything.
She always has an excuse everytime I want to come visit her or want her to visit. I'm being put 3rd or 4th or 5th. It's like....I put her first and foremost, so I expect the same from her. I can't be behind anything. You guys all see it my way. She acts like NOBODY would see it my way. Like what she does is right, what I do is wrong. Wanting to be with her right now is wrong. No.
I went to orientation btw a little over a week ago. Nice girls. I even talked to one, no flirting nothing going on....just basically talk. I even felt guilty for that. I avoid it for Stefanie. If this continues though....you can believe that I'm going to make it clear she's losing out. I can't do it any longer.
Maybe if I was with one of those girls, she'd realize and come back. But why do that? There are plenty of fish in the sea. I've heard that....but nobody knows exactly the situation and how close I am with Stefanie. I love her, and I'll marry her. I can't think any other way.
This is getting too long and I've already said more than I should......