Is "cyber-sex" cheating?
I imagine you've dealt with this topic before. But since I wasn't here then, I'd be interested in knowing your thoughts on this matter.
If you were to get involved in a steamy relationship with someone online, and if it STAYED online ONLY, would you consider that "cheating" on your significant other?
After all, isn't cyber-sex basically and totally a 'mental' thing?
Could a cyber-sexual relationship with 'someone else' even be 'good' for your relationship with your significant other?
If it isn't too personal a question, have you ever been involved in a cyber-sex relationship? Did your significant other find out? Did she/he have a fit about it?
Just wondering.
And yes, I know it's none of my business!
Carol
If you were to get involved in a steamy relationship with someone online, and if it STAYED online ONLY, would you consider that "cheating" on your significant other?
After all, isn't cyber-sex basically and totally a 'mental' thing?
Could a cyber-sexual relationship with 'someone else' even be 'good' for your relationship with your significant other?
If it isn't too personal a question, have you ever been involved in a cyber-sex relationship? Did your significant other find out? Did she/he have a fit about it?
Just wondering.
And yes, I know it's none of my business!
Carol
Comments
I dont think it's cheating but then again, if my girlfriend was engaging in cybersex I wouldn't want to know about it either. If I found out about it, I wouldn't ask her too stop though. If it started interferring with our relationship, I would consider it cheating and ask her to stop.
It is cheating.
Aries 1B
Originally posted by BR
It's not cheating as long as you never see a picture.
that's an interesting point, a picture to keep is something personal and I would find disturbing. But I'm not sure about webcams... I dont consider going to a strip bar and getting a lap dance cheating. Then again I wouldn't take a photo of the dancer and keep it.
So if I didn't know and she didn't save the feeds, I think a webcam might be acceptable. Tricky, I hope I never have to think about it in the real world.
By the way, Dr. Laura can lick my testicles.
Originally posted by Ganondorf
Cheating is whatever you and yours define as cheating. Cheating is violating the terms of the relationship. It may be cheating to one couple and not cheating to another. It's totally subjective.
that's true but how do you define what's cheating and what isn't until after the fact ? I don't think too many couples work out the finer details of what's cheating and what isn't... maybe they should though.
Originally posted by BR
It's not cheating as long as you never see a picture.
How does a picture really change things?
I mean, there is no 'personal' contact. You've never been together. The relationship occurs only in your mind, via words on a screen. Is that really cheating, do you think?
I mean, you're just having thoughts! - no personal contact.
Isn't that pretty much the same as if you saw someone passing on the street and had 'thoughts' about her. Maybe you see her daily, and have 'daily thoughts'!
Is that really any different from the thoughts you'd have from an online relationship? Just wondering.....
Originally posted by AsLan^
Didn't Doctor Ruth say it was cheating ? or maybe she said it wasnt...
I dont think it's cheating but then again, if my girlfriend was engaging in cybersex I wouldn't want to know about it either. If I found out about it, I wouldn't ask her too stop though. If it started interferring with our relationship, I would consider it cheating and ask her to stop.
I think it's interesting that you wouldn't ask her to stop.
How do you envision that it might interfere with your relationship? (Granted, it's absolutely none of my business.)
How can Dr. Ruth speak authoritatively about something she's probably never experienced?
Of course it's cheating.
Is reading a dirty story cheating?
I am a follower of the Clinton school of thought on "sexual relations"
Originally posted by Wrong Robot
Well if movies have taught me anything, than the mental aspect of sex is more important...'the mind makes it real'
So if your 'mind' gets off on a movie or a porn site, would that be all that much different from an online sex relationship? I mean, it's all via a screen!
Would those anonymous screen experiences (movies/porn) be essentially different from a non-contact, 'mental' experience with someone with a name, who was typing words back to you on a screen?
And lap-dancing isn't really cheating? Isn't it a fairly major physical 'contact' experience?
Wouldn't the sheer physicality of it be 'more' cheating than a 100% 'screen' experience?
His ex is much happier now though . . . wouldn't you be?!
Cybersex, besides being completely ridiculous, is barely involvement . . . so much is left to the imagination that its really almost onanism . .
except
there is that extension of the other person's mind prodding one to think this way and that . . . that extension of the human body called language, via that extension of the human nervous system: the internet
is it cheating?
depends on what is going on and what it means to the participant: if someone is trying it to see what all the buzz is about then it isn't even akin to flirting behind your lovey's back . . .
if one is doing it to reach into another person's mind and caress their labia with glistening phonemes . . . then it is another story entirely
I have to say I'm quite surprised at the overwhelming percentage. Not sure why, exactly. But I definitely am!
Originally posted by Carol A
How does a picture really change things?
I mean, there is no 'personal' contact. You've never been together. The relationship occurs only in your mind, via words on a screen. Is that really cheating, do you think?
I mean, you're just having thoughts! - no personal contact.
Isn't that pretty much the same as if you saw someone passing on the street and had 'thoughts' about her. Maybe you see her daily, and have 'daily thoughts'!
Is that really any different from the thoughts you'd have from an online relationship? Just wondering.....
It's the interaction and seeing who you are interacting with. Phone sex isn't cheating. Cyber isn't cheating.
if its real passion for the other person at the other end of the phone or the computer then its cheating
I don't even think my wife would find it cheating if she were to catch me writing idiotic things like
"and now my zipper is slowly loosening my throbbing meat rocket . . . "
gimme break, how can that be passionate. . . but then again I just don't get it . . if I were to be passionate about someone on the other end then there would have to have been something happening there other than just cybersex and that's where the cheating happens
otherwise its just silly . . complete drollery
Originally posted by pfflam
if one is doing it to reach into another person's mind and caress their labia with glistening phonemes . . . then it is another story entirely
Uhh...interesting sentence.....
(Cough)