Man, I'm laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes.
What hurts is that you can actually SEE him doing it! Someone needs to make a GIF of his monkey-dance and graphically add hammers to his flailing hands and place iPads at random intervals along the stage...
(This would make a GREAT Flash ad! Oh, wait a minute...)
Man, ballmer has no vision at all. At least Gates had some vision and knew early on what was gonna be popular. He came up with a touch table at least. I feel like ballmer is just a figurehead who does not understand the industry and possibly has someone write his speeches for him. A little of script and he start yelling some random stuff.
Watch a video with Jobs, with Scmidt, with Gates, with Kevin Lynch even. They know what they are talking about. Then watch ballmer and you just see the incompetence. Now I don't know if he has a speach disability like Bush supposedly had, but its not very good for a CEO.
The guy is in a fantasy land in his ivory tower and the tower is sinking into the sand.
Ivory tower???
Oh, no -- think more like a GIANT smoked sausage, planted into the sand and rising 1,000 feet above the surface. Ballmer has chewed a passage from the bottom to the top, where he resides in all that meaty by-producty goodness!!!
(Let's be honest: all the fat's clearly gone STRAIGHT to his sausage-addled brain.)
Microsoft is merely the bun around this colossal... Oh, I blush!!!
It's kind of sad to actually watch MS fall apart like this. I'm sure the board must know that MS can't succeed in the next gneration of computing with Ballmer yet no one has the guts to say it. They are going to wait until stock prices drop when shareholders dump they're stock and by then it'll be too late. The world will have moved on.
As it is now, the only real advantage MS has is Office. God forbid that monopoly ever falls apart, MS will truly be finished.
Now I don't know if he has a speach disability like Bush supposedly had, but its not very good for a CEO.
With Bush, whether someone liked him or not, he clearly had "trouble with the language." He would be speaking just fine, and then, all of a sudden -- out came a messed-up word or goofed-up phrase. Of course, he followed Clinton, who was one of the best speakers (read: speech-readers) ever to hold office, even if his style was typically boring. (Really, you could always tell that Clinton was reading; I think even Gore was more engaging at times.)
Imagine if Emeril Lagasse had trouble with his catchphrases: instead of saying, "BAM!" he would blurt out, "BLAM!" or "WHAM-O!" or "FLOWERS!!!" -- just not the same. Or instead of "Kick it up a notch!" he would yell, "Flick it in the Scotch!" or "Stick it in your crotch!" Much head-scratching would ensue. () And this is the kind of goofy crap that would happen with Bush. ()
With Ballmer, I generally CRINGE whenever I see that he's going to open his mouth and let forth an utterance. All-too-often, he basically just bores me to death, but he'll let out the occasional whopper that brings out the face-palm (make it a double!).
If the iPad is slow then Windows must be excruciatingly slow.... I mean really! Why does he have to lie...nobody believes him anyway. He makes himself look more like an idiot by being in such denial.
Didn't Ballmer say back in 2007 he wasn't worried when asked about the iPhone and said he liked his strategy very well...hmmm, how's that strategy working, Ballmer.
You have to admit wether you like or hate Microsoft that this guy is not a good leader, visionary or a good example for Microsoft. I almost feel bad for Microsoft. Makes me wonder if Ballmer believes anything he says himself.....nahhhh, he's just a salesman in the shoes of a CEO leading the blind.
Whenever a CEO speaks at an event, it's 100% PR. Only information for the public-at-large should be revealed, and there should be a mission, a message, a goal. The speaker should be well prepped by his PR department, investor relations, legal, etc. I didn't think Jobs was stellar, but Balmer was clearly caught off guard and I think this speaks to a lack of preparation, more than anything else. (Maybe he's been off guard for the past ten years!)
That being said, I think Walt missed the mark by focusing too much on Apple. The real battle for MSFT is with Google. Apple is "closed" hardware/software combo (I don't say that in any pejorative way. It's just that one manufacturer wont rule the world). Google is following MSFT's model: provide OS for multiple manufacturers. Unfortunately for Mr. Softie, they're GIVING it away. Just wait for Chrome OS. The real question for the monkey boy is "How do you compete with that?"
If the iPad is slow then Windows must be excruciatingly slow.... I mean really! Why does he have to lie...nobody believes him anyway. He makes himself look more like an idiot by being in such denial.
We have to remember that in spite of Balmer's laughably incompetent antics, he still sits astride a cash cow that is good for at least another decade or more, depending on whether they continue with the current leadership and culture or not. The unholy 3: Windows for server (.NET, Exchange, Communicator, Sharepoint, etc.), Windows for Desktop and Office are fairly well insulated from the consumer market erosion by the huge installed base in corporate infrastructure. Windows Mobile will die a slow death as the old Windows CE/Mobile declines and the new Pink/Windows Phone 7 fails to reclaim any significant lost marketshare. Their entertainment division will continue to putter along with the current product line, making just enough revenue to keep it going.
But it is the 3 that keep Microsoft afloat. We are already seeing some executive bleedout, even as they try to ineffectually reorg. They are substantially damned by their culture and that is something no reorg can change. So while they shed talent, they cannot use the attractiveness of the once golden stock options to attract new talent, so they are forced to take lesser talent or pay much more for the talent they do attract. The 3 are all mature technologies - there is no where to go with them - nothing visionary to build, and development is lock-stepped with corporate restrictions and OEM platform decisions. Look at how HP and HTC have already developed a touch overlay to "assist" Windows in delivering a multitouch experience - and add overhead to the OS and CPU. It will take a decade or more to see any adverse impact to the 3, but it will come, because it is the natural cycle of things. And the harder you fight either the aging process (without providing a way to metamorphose your business for the next paradigm) the worse the end result is.
"There may be a reason they call them Mack trucks"
Umm yeah there is a reason. Mack is the name of the company that makes them.
You know that feeling of embarrassment you get from watching a really bad comedian? That's exactly how I felt reading that crap line.
Here's the problem with Ballmer.
In 2007 he mocked the iPhone only to be trounced by Apple with it. Now here he is saying PCs are going to stick around... something tells me he's going to be trounced again.
This guy is such a tool. It's almost sad to see him in charge of MS. Never been a fan of MS but I don't want to see him destroy the company either... haha
He reminds me of the Iraqi Information Minister during the Iraq war.
Comments
Ballmer NO LIKE pad - Ballmer make CONFUSED by pad!!! It shiny pretty thing! Me not know how do shiny pretty thing work... Me SMASH! ME SMASH it!!!!!
Man, I'm laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes.
Man, I'm laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes.
What hurts is that you can actually SEE him doing it! Someone needs to make a GIF of his monkey-dance and graphically add hammers to his flailing hands and place iPads at random intervals along the stage...
(This would make a GREAT Flash ad! Oh, wait a minute...)
Watch a video with Jobs, with Scmidt, with Gates, with Kevin Lynch even. They know what they are talking about. Then watch ballmer and you just see the incompetence. Now I don't know if he has a speach disability like Bush supposedly had, but its not very good for a CEO.
The guy is in a fantasy land in his ivory tower and the tower is sinking into the sand.
Ivory tower???
Oh, no -- think more like a GIANT smoked sausage, planted into the sand and rising 1,000 feet above the surface. Ballmer has chewed a passage from the bottom to the top, where he resides in all that meaty by-producty goodness!!!
(Let's be honest: all the fat's clearly gone STRAIGHT to his sausage-addled brain.)
Microsoft is merely the bun around this colossal... Oh, I blush!!!
As it is now, the only real advantage MS has is Office. God forbid that monopoly ever falls apart, MS will truly be finished.
Now I don't know if he has a speach disability like Bush supposedly had, but its not very good for a CEO.
With Bush, whether someone liked him or not, he clearly had "trouble with the language." He would be speaking just fine, and then, all of a sudden -- out came a messed-up word or goofed-up phrase. Of course, he followed Clinton, who was one of the best speakers (read: speech-readers) ever to hold office, even if his style was typically boring. (Really, you could always tell that Clinton was reading; I think even Gore was more engaging at times.)
Imagine if Emeril Lagasse had trouble with his catchphrases: instead of saying, "BAM!" he would blurt out, "BLAM!" or "WHAM-O!" or "FLOWERS!!!" -- just not the same. Or instead of "Kick it up a notch!" he would yell, "Flick it in the Scotch!" or "Stick it in your crotch!" Much head-scratching would ensue. (
With Ballmer, I generally CRINGE whenever I see that he's going to open his mouth and let forth an utterance. All-too-often, he basically just bores me to death, but he'll let out the occasional whopper that brings out the face-palm (make it a double!).
Now I don't know if he has a speach disability like Bush supposedly had, but its not very good for a CEO.
Bush has a BRAIN disability.
Didn't Ballmer say back in 2007 he wasn't worried when asked about the iPhone and said he liked his strategy very well...hmmm, how's that strategy working, Ballmer.
You have to admit wether you like or hate Microsoft that this guy is not a good leader, visionary or a good example for Microsoft. I almost feel bad for Microsoft. Makes me wonder if Ballmer believes anything he says himself.....nahhhh, he's just a salesman in the shoes of a CEO leading the blind.
That being said, I think Walt missed the mark by focusing too much on Apple. The real battle for MSFT is with Google. Apple is "closed" hardware/software combo (I don't say that in any pejorative way. It's just that one manufacturer wont rule the world). Google is following MSFT's model: provide OS for multiple manufacturers. Unfortunately for Mr. Softie, they're GIVING it away. Just wait for Chrome OS. The real question for the monkey boy is "How do you compete with that?"
If the iPad is slow then Windows must be excruciatingly slow.... I mean really! Why does he have to lie...nobody believes him anyway. He makes himself look more like an idiot by being in such denial.
He's still looking for the START button.
How is iPad slow in taking notes???? May be he was slow in typing or in thinking.....
Its running iPhone OS on a borrowed iPad (not his) and certainly can't run Windows 7...silly
But it is the 3 that keep Microsoft afloat. We are already seeing some executive bleedout, even as they try to ineffectually reorg. They are substantially damned by their culture and that is something no reorg can change. So while they shed talent, they cannot use the attractiveness of the once golden stock options to attract new talent, so they are forced to take lesser talent or pay much more for the talent they do attract. The 3 are all mature technologies - there is no where to go with them - nothing visionary to build, and development is lock-stepped with corporate restrictions and OEM platform decisions. Look at how HP and HTC have already developed a touch overlay to "assist" Windows in delivering a multitouch experience - and add overhead to the OS and CPU. It will take a decade or more to see any adverse impact to the 3, but it will come, because it is the natural cycle of things. And the harder you fight either the aging process (without providing a way to metamorphose your business for the next paradigm) the worse the end result is.
"There may be a reason they call them Mack trucks"
Umm yeah there is a reason. Mack is the name of the company that makes them.
You know that feeling of embarrassment you get from watching a really bad comedian? That's exactly how I felt reading that crap line.
Here's the problem with Ballmer.
In 2007 he mocked the iPhone only to be trounced by Apple with it. Now here he is saying PCs are going to stick around... something tells me he's going to be trounced again.
Which is exactly MS's *problem* - they believe the world is made of PCs and Word docs.
nokia has nice phones.
we missed the boat, but we're in 5th place!
i fired a lot of people.
i don't know what a PC is.
i use a hammer to smash PC.
what they need is to focus on that big ass "surface"...
THAT's the future of computing... a Table.
Ballmer NO LIKE pad - Ballmer make CONFUSED by pad!!! It shiny pretty thing! Me not know how do shiny pretty thing work... Me SMASH! ME SMASH it!!!!!)
HA! Awesome.
He reminds me of the Iraqi Information Minister during the Iraq war.