You need to be nice AFTER you have a girlfriend. Be fun first, then find a girl, then be nice to her. If you're nice first, that's fine, but it might not be as helpful as you'd think.
If you can't quit the nice guy persona, just make sure you never direct all of your attention to one girl. It'll freak them out. Be nice to everyone, boys and girls, men and women. Don't pay too much attention to anyone, and as I said before, start doing things for yourself. Start having fun. Your focus shouldn't be on someone else, but yourself. If you're happy, in good spirits, having fun (I can't say that enough) then your attitude will be infectious.
Take the initiative, make group plans to do stupid things. Go skydiving with a group of friends.
When I'm speaking my mind, I'm usually talking about the qualities of my genitals. Which way it hooks, which but hangs lower, how small it is, which major political figure it most closely resembles, etc.
small penis + "baby-eater" signs = no white chicks
Here's the thing, chicks are weird. I mean when it comes down to it, that's what I've learned. Especially here in the US. The whole 'dating' thing, and trying to figure it out is not the way to go. If you meet a girl by trying to meet her and trying to hook up, then there's a good chance things would get funny after a while. This country has so people so worried about image that you don't really know who a person is until after they let their guard down and stop trying to me a movie star. Sorry if my advice seems rather negative, but then again dating advice from a computer nerd message board shouldn't be taken too seriously , but coming out of a rather long relationship that ended really badly I don't have too much good to say. Girls are weird and guys are jerks...? Isn't that the way it goes?
Here's the thing, chicks are weird. I mean when it comes down to it, that's what I've learned. Especially here in the US. The whole 'dating' thing, and trying to figure it out is not the way to go. If you meet a girl by trying to meet her and trying to hook up, then there's a good chance things would get funny after a while. This country has so people so worried about image that you don't really know who a person is until after they let their guard down and stop trying to me a movie star. Sorry if my advice seems rather negative, but then again dating advice from a computer nerd message board shouldn't be taken too seriously , but coming out of a rather long relationship that ended really badly I don't have too much good to say. Girls are weird and guys are jerks...? Isn't that the way it goes?
Hey man I'm not getting any younger over here and I still can't figure it out.
I find a lot of what you say here to be correct.
I'm a good guy, good looking, set for life, intelligent, and yet my resume with the girls is like a blank canvas.
The several failed attempts I have made over the years are really depressing.
Hey, I'll admit it. I can face the truth.
The thing is however I will not let my past stop me from embracing my future.
Me and my girlfriend were together for 4 years, first relationship I had ever had that was like a serious thing, the kind of relationship were you don't think about it ending. Things got a little funny between us for a couple months out of nowhere, and then it was the girl leaves guy for guy's best friend (and drummer, stupid drummer...) situation. I thought that only happened in movies and TV shows... The worst part is that until my work picks up enough for me to get my own place, I'm still living with her, and he's over there every day.
So now I'm back to trying to figure out how girls work again. \
That is some ****ed up shit. I can understand you can't afford something else or the lease is joint or in her name or whatever but I'd do anything, move back in with my parents, go to a church shelter, sleep in my car, or even get back together with groverat's mom before I would continue living with an ex-girlfriend who dumped/cheated on me with a former best friend. Your home is like a self-inflicted mind****. You need to figure some way out of that mess man.
Give the man the benefit of hte doubt and assume there is probably a good reason he hasn't kicked her out. Surely he isn't just being a nice guy cause that would be just too damn forgiving. Even Jesus woulda kicked that bitch to the curb if he coulda. Co-signed lease would be a decent enough reason I guess. That's about the only one that I can think of though.
It's actually her mom's house, about two years ago I was in a tough situation and needed a place to live so she let me convert the basement into an apartment. I pretty much hide out downstairs when I'm home, and I have a separate door of my own for if I come home not wanting to deal with them, but I'm trying to make sure I stay on good terms with the family still because I'm still there rent-free. I just throw a few bucks in for bills and stuff every now and then, and buy food sometimes. And I have my own broadband internet I pay for.
Quote:
Originally posted by ColanderOfDeath
That is some ****ed up shit. I can understand you can't afford something else or the lease is joint or in her name or whatever but I'd do anything, move back in with my parents, go to a church shelter, sleep in my car, or even get back together with groverat's mom before I would continue living with an ex-girlfriend who dumped/cheated on me with a former best friend. Your home is like a self-inflicted mind****. You need to figure some way out of that mess man.
I've been staying at a friend's house every now and then, but that $40 a month for broadband can't be completely wasted at home. The parents thing almost worked, my father offered for me to move in, but I don't think he expected me to accept, because a week later when I did his tone changed to "I'll help you find a place then", and the way winters are up here, the car thing is 117% out of the question.
I saw Barishnikov perform at MIFA last night. While I was there I saw an Asian guy decked out with two count 'em, two! blondes. Maybe get your hands on tickets to dance / ballet / theatre?
Yeah it should be easy for you, a man whose glorious phallus is larger than my entire body.
Oh shit. . . did those pictures get on the internet already? The grass skirt didn't offer much coverage.
Anyway, you should try it sometime. A lot of young folks think that it's terribly difficult to get a girl on a date. It's not. She probably won't jump in your pants, (and if she does, I'd say back off) but it gives you a little bit of time to find out if you like her or not, and vice versa. Hence the definition of a "date."
Princeton girls are known to be a bit paranoid about male-female relationships until the 5th reunion when they realize they were crazy. But still, the quick date is very possible, and if she says no, the seed has been planted. Then it's your duty to ask again in a few days if she's good looking enough to merit that kind of attention.
There are rare occasions where it can build up into a great pile of shit, but even so, it's not really that big of a deal.
I'm a bit confused on what type of a girl I want because the most interesting conversations with my friends are philosophy/psychology/science related and I don't think I want that in a relationship (since I already talk about it with friends).
Well, see, um, uh. Alright. If you cant have a conversation with your girlfriend on a level equal or above that that you have with your friends then you are going to have a very boring relationship. What interests you with your friends will remain interesting to you regardless of whether your girlfriend is there or not. Also, undoubtedly you will spend time where both your friends and your girl friend are all present, why would you want your girlfriend to feel out of the loop?
Above that, you seem to be looking for a girlfriend which while realistic is probably the best way to have a bad time in everything you do that is remotely related to a girl you find attractive. It seems like you need to grow up a little more (no offense), and find someone you like to spend time with and see from there.
A) Find another place to live, even if you have to swallow your pride and go back to your family or an old neighbor or something. Where you are at is not a healthy place for you.
Once you've moved out, walk up behind your friend and kick him in the nuts. Walk away without a word.
3) Once A & B are taken care of, be glad in the knowledge that before you can marry someone and have it work out, you generally need to go through multiple relationships. Hopefully with different types of girls to find out what you like and don't like in women and vice versa.
It's as much a way to learn about yourself as it is a way to have good times / get laid / etc.
PS - BUNGE - it's not his place. You can't kick her ass out if it's not your place.
Comments
Originally posted by bunge
You need to be nice AFTER you have a girlfriend. Be fun first, then find a girl, then be nice to her. If you're nice first, that's fine, but it might not be as helpful as you'd think.
If you can't quit the nice guy persona, just make sure you never direct all of your attention to one girl. It'll freak them out. Be nice to everyone, boys and girls, men and women. Don't pay too much attention to anyone, and as I said before, start doing things for yourself. Start having fun. Your focus shouldn't be on someone else, but yourself. If you're happy, in good spirits, having fun (I can't say that enough) then your attitude will be infectious.
Take the initiative, make group plans to do stupid things. Go skydiving with a group of friends.
Great advice, bunge.
When I'm speaking my mind, I'm usually talking about the qualities of my genitals. Which way it hooks, which but hangs lower, how small it is, which major political figure it most closely resembles, etc.
small penis + "baby-eater" signs = no white chicks
Originally posted by groverat
Eugene:
small penis + "baby-eater" signs = no white chicks
Are you positive about the baby-eater sign?
Originally posted by Extras.rsrc
Here's the thing, chicks are weird. I mean when it comes down to it, that's what I've learned. Especially here in the US. The whole 'dating' thing, and trying to figure it out is not the way to go. If you meet a girl by trying to meet her and trying to hook up, then there's a good chance things would get funny after a while. This country has so people so worried about image that you don't really know who a person is until after they let their guard down and stop trying to me a movie star. Sorry if my advice seems rather negative, but then again dating advice from a computer nerd message board shouldn't be taken too seriously
Hey man I'm not getting any younger over here and I still can't figure it out.
I find a lot of what you say here to be correct.
I'm a good guy, good looking, set for life, intelligent, and yet my resume with the girls is like a blank canvas.
The several failed attempts I have made over the years are really depressing.
Hey, I'll admit it. I can face the truth.
The thing is however I will not let my past stop me from embracing my future.
Fellows
So now I'm back to trying to figure out how girls work again.
Originally posted by Extras.rsrc
The worst part is that until my work picks up enough for me to get my own place, I'm still living with her, and he's over there every day.
Kick her ass out.
Originally posted by Extras.rsrc
it was the girl leaves guy for guy's best friend (and drummer, stupid drummer...) situation.
... The worst part is that until my work picks up enough for me to get my own place, I'm still living with her, and he's over there every day...
Ouch
Originally posted by ColanderOfDeath
You need to figure some way out of that mess man.
Kick her ass out.
Originally posted by bunge
Kick her ass out.
It's actually her mom's house, about two years ago I was in a tough situation and needed a place to live so she let me convert the basement into an apartment. I pretty much hide out downstairs when I'm home, and I have a separate door of my own for if I come home not wanting to deal with them, but I'm trying to make sure I stay on good terms with the family still because I'm still there rent-free. I just throw a few bucks in for bills and stuff every now and then, and buy food sometimes. And I have my own broadband internet I pay for.
Originally posted by ColanderOfDeath
That is some ****ed up shit. I can understand you can't afford something else or the lease is joint or in her name or whatever but I'd do anything, move back in with my parents, go to a church shelter, sleep in my car, or even get back together with groverat's mom before I would continue living with an ex-girlfriend who dumped/cheated on me with a former best friend. Your home is like a self-inflicted mind****. You need to figure some way out of that mess man.
I've been staying at a friend's house every now and then, but that $40 a month for broadband can't be completely wasted at home. The parents thing almost worked, my father offered for me to move in, but I don't think he expected me to accept, because a week later when I did his tone changed to "I'll help you find a place then", and the way winters are up here, the car thing is 117% out of the question.
Thanks guys.
"hey, I've seen you around at the [insert place here], do you want to get some coffee sometime?"
The worst thing that can happen is that she'll respond with "no."
I saw Barishnikov perform at MIFA last night. While I was there I saw an Asian guy decked out with two count 'em, two! blondes. Maybe get your hands on tickets to dance / ballet / theatre?
Originally posted by Splinemodel
Advice on dating:
"hey, I've seen you around at the [insert place here], do you want to get some coffee sometime?"
Yeah it should be easy for you, a man whose glorious phallus is larger than my entire body.
Originally posted by DiscoCow
Yeah it should be easy for you, a man whose glorious phallus is larger than my entire body.
Oh shit. . . did those pictures get on the internet already? The grass skirt didn't offer much coverage.
Anyway, you should try it sometime. A lot of young folks think that it's terribly difficult to get a girl on a date. It's not. She probably won't jump in your pants, (and if she does, I'd say back off) but it gives you a little bit of time to find out if you like her or not, and vice versa. Hence the definition of a "date."
Princeton girls are known to be a bit paranoid about male-female relationships until the 5th reunion when they realize they were crazy. But still, the quick date is very possible, and if she says no, the seed has been planted. Then it's your duty to ask again in a few days if she's good looking enough to merit that kind of attention.
There are rare occasions where it can build up into a great pile of shit, but even so, it's not really that big of a deal.
Originally posted by Splinemodel
The grass skirt didn't offer much coverage.
A fucking 747 wouldn't offer enough coverage. It scares me.
It scared me. For life.
Originally posted by stevegongrui
I'm a bit confused on what type of a girl I want because the most interesting conversations with my friends are philosophy/psychology/science related and I don't think I want that in a relationship (since I already talk about it with friends).
Well, see, um, uh. Alright. If you cant have a conversation with your girlfriend on a level equal or above that that you have with your friends then you are going to have a very boring relationship. What interests you with your friends will remain interesting to you regardless of whether your girlfriend is there or not. Also, undoubtedly you will spend time where both your friends and your girl friend are all present, why would you want your girlfriend to feel out of the loop?
Above that, you seem to be looking for a girlfriend which while realistic is probably the best way to have a bad time in everything you do that is remotely related to a girl you find attractive. It seems like you need to grow up a little more (no offense), and find someone you like to spend time with and see from there.
Edit: and take bunge's advice.
Two things [ok, three things]:
A) Find another place to live, even if you have to swallow your pride and go back to your family or an old neighbor or something. Where you are at is not a healthy place for you.
3) Once A & B are taken care of, be glad in the knowledge that before you can marry someone and have it work out, you generally need to go through multiple relationships. Hopefully with different types of girls to find out what you like and don't like in women and vice versa.
It's as much a way to learn about yourself as it is a way to have good times / get laid / etc.
PS - BUNGE - it's not his place. You can't kick her ass out if it's not your place.
Originally posted by Splinemodel
Advice on dating:
"hey, I've seen you around at the [insert place here], do you want to get some coffee sometime?"
The worst thing that can happen is that she'll respond with "no."
Oh she will say yes, but is an alien space vampire who likes to walk around naked, and sucks your life out of you and you die...
or, she says no, yells rape and sprays you in the eyes with pepper spray....